Japanese Stone Garden
by evie4
Summary: B'Elanna's change after the Barge of the Dead affects everyone. Events in the Alpha & Delta quads shake up Voyager & the Federation. Starfleet shows its true colors. Bajor and Tuvok are caught in the middle. Harry grows up. Seven adapts.
1. Epiphany

Once she was officially released from Sick Bay, B'Elanna Torres hurried to her quarters as quickly as she could without drawing attention to herself. She needed to be alone so that she could work through everything that happened. And, she needed to get her temper in check before she saw Captain Janeway again. B'Elanna did not care if the captain did not share her same beliefs. It would be strange if anyone else on board did considering she was the only Klingon within 65 thousand light years of their current location. But, she expected the captain to at least acknowledge them. At least respect them. Janeway did not. 

What she does not understand is the captain's position. If Tuvok entered Pon Far and chose to die, she would let him. Of this B'Elanna was absolutely convinced. Yes, he is the captain's oldest friend and most trusted advisor. He is also head of security. She would not want to loose him for personal and professional reasons, but she would respect his wishes. This was a matter of her mother's eternal existence. Pon Far is about sex. She can't understand how the two compare. Of course, she could not and did not say these things out loud. She did not explain that she was on the Barge of the Dead with her mother and needed to remain there until she did what had to be done. What she said was that she did not want any medical treatment. B'Elanna remembers saying that several times. She could not understand how those instructions were unclear!

Because the captain ordered the doctor to intervene her before she could make atonement or elect to take her mother's place, she knows Miral is dead and will exist in torment and dishonor. B'Elanna silently chastised herself for being the cause of this while knowing that there is only one thing she can do for her mother now. These thoughts are spinning around in her head as she makes her way back to her quarters. Once inside, she comes to a decision that she hopes others will not interfere with even if they do not understand or respect it.

She did not want to get into it with anyone and she did not want any visitors. Her only hope was that Chakotay would understand this and honor her wishes. Sitting in front of her console, she takes a few moments to order her thoughts before composing her formal request for two weeks personal leave. She knew that after her dangerous holo deck activities there would be questions and concerns. That was resolved over two years ago but the captain still restricted her holo deck usage. There would be many who would suspect a repeat performance but this could not be helped and she would not explain the particulars to any of them. B'Elanna tried not to be overwhelmed emotionally by the realization of what her stubborn pride and utter lack of honor has done. 

After forwarding the request to Chakotay she started her mental things to do list. Knowing that she needed to begin preparations, she took steps to insure her privacy. Hopefully, the captain would get the message. 

B'Elanna was not an expert in all things Klingon. Truthfully, she wasn't an expert in anything Klingon except the Bat'leth and all other forms of combat and fighting. She had her secret stash of every Klingon weapon ever to exist. If the captain only knew about that assassin's knife in her underwear drawer she'd have a fit. Fleeting memories of things her grandmother tried to teach her weren't lost over the years, just placed in the back of her mind. Customs, rituals, prayers and raditions. She seemed determined to scorn them as a teenager. Now that she took the time to think about it, B'Elanna had to admit, she was a pretty lousy Klingon. But this, this experience with her mother rocked her world then spun it off its axis. She knew what she saw, felt, and endured. She knew it was the truth.

Chakotay said nothing from his seat on the bridge as he read B'Elanna's request for leave. It was by the book. More than by the book, it was air tight and as formal as it gets since she cited every applicable Starfleet regulation and code . This told him several things. First, B'Elanna intended to have her leave. Second, she did not wish to discuss anything with him or anyone else. Third, she was cutting off any complaint from the captain. Finally, she recognized the likelihood that he or Janeway would bring up what happened in the past. As much as her reckless holo deck activities scared and angered him at the time, he understood that she was not trying to kill herself. She was trying to feel something. Janeway did not. He also disliked the fact that after two years she still had restricted holo deck privileges and everyone on the ship knew it. Chakotay knew B'Elanna took that as a sign that the captain did not trust her. On some level he agreed but knew he could never voice that opinion. He also knew that unless the captain removed those restrictions on her own, they would remain. 

Steeling himself for the conversation that he knew would follow once he brought her request to the captain's attention; he rose and followed her to her Ready room at the end of Alpha shift without a word or an invitation. Janeway knew that look. She suppressed the 'what's happened now' that was on the tip of her tongue as she motion for him to have a seat.

"Chakotay, I assume by your expression that there is something on one of those pads I am not going to like?"

"Not necessarily."

That was just cryptic enough to get her attention so she nodded for him to continue.

"Its about Lt. Torres."

Immediately she catches that he used her rank and not her first name. 

"What has she done?"

Already Chakotay isn't liking where this is heading and tries to stop it.

"She hasn't done anything that I'm aware of." Instead of explaining he simply hands over the data pad.

Intrigued, Janeway accepts it and starts to read. With a raised eye,

"This is unusual for B'Elanna. Every I crossed and T dotted. What is she up to?"

"She requested leave."

"Yes, I can see that. Why? Don't tell me you think she's going to try something again?" This does cause the captain some concern.

Choosing his words carefully,

"No. There is no reason for her to experience that again."

"Then why does she need two weeks leave? She practically lives in Engineering and never takes time off. Afraid someone might get too close to 'her' warp core or start messing around with her engines."

Then she stops and loses the smile that graced her face moments ago.

"What's going on?"

"I haven't spoken to her personally. She only sent me the leave request." And that's all he wanted to say.

Janeway thinks about it a few minutes, clearly worried.

"This is about her not wanting to be treated in sick bay. Do you think she'll try to hurt herself again?" Not waiting for an answer,

"Computer. Locate Lt. Torres."

"Lt. Torres is in her quarters."

"Katherine, she wasn't trying to hurt herself then. That was over two years ago and there really isn't much she can do as you still have her holo deck access restricted."

He wasn't as successful as he wished in concealing his real opinion on that subject and that surprised her. He never mentioned it before. Opting not to get into it she decides to check B'Elanna's condition for herself.

"Janeway to Torres."

"Unable to comply. You are not authorized access while in privacy mode."

That causes both of the captain's eyebrows to shoot up. She is the captain, who else would have access??? Then she remembers her skilled and crafty engineer could do anything she wanted to the ship's systems whenever she got ready.

"Who is authorized access to Lt. Torres while in privacy mode?" She practically hissed.

"Unable to comply. Privacy seal engaged. Level 9A security clearance required."

Yeah, now she's ticked for several reasons. What she really wants to know is how B'Elanna has access to Level 9A clearance. Since Starfleet captains have Level 10 security clearance she's just glad B'Elanna didn't lock out her over ride ability. When she thought about it, she realized B'Elanna probably could have done just that. [What is she hiding?] But a privacy seal means someone has access. The captain tosses a suspicious glare at the man sitting across from her while she addresses the computer.

"Over ride authorization Janeway Alpha Gamma 994."

"Communications access to Lt. Torres is restricted to all persons except Commander Chakotay and Lt. Commander Tuvok."

Chakotay called on all his training and discipline to keep a straight face. He wasn't sure what B'Elanna was up to but he knew why he had access. The only reason she wanted to hear from him was for confirmation that her request was granted. After that, he's pretty sure she'll take him off the list. Including Tuvok was a brilliant move. Katherine couldn't complain and she'd get nothing but the bare bones facts from Tuvok. It was good to see that the Maquis within her was still active and kicking.

Janeway slumps back in her chair thinking about this new development. She doesn't know what's going on with B'Elanna. Allowing Chakotay access is understandable and expected considering their friendship so she doesn't question that. What she can't figure out is why she included Tuvok. She considers that he did offer to teach her meditation techniques in the past and wonders if he is assisting her now. Then she remembers whom she's dealing with and came to the same conclusion as Chakotay. [B'Elanna doesn't want to deal with anyone, especially me, and figures I won't press the issue if Tuvok is allowed access.]

"Computer. What else has Lt. Torres initiated in the last...3 hours?"

"Unable to comply. Privacy seal engaged. Level 9A security clearance required."

Exhaling deeply and trying not to be annoyed, she starts over.

"Over ride. Authorization Janeway Alpha Gamma 994."

"Lt. Torres initiated a large scale recycling, replicated several items, and activated privacy restrictions for her quarters and com unit."

"What was recycled?"

"All standard issue Starfleet furnishings. 30,000 replicator rations deposited into her personal account at 13:00."

No longer suspicious or irritated, the captain is confused and extremely concerned. [Why would she get rid of all her furniture? This makes no sense!]

"List all persons who have access to her quarters."

"Secured access limited to Lt. Commander Tuvok."

"What do you mean secured access?"

"Lt. Torres authorized unrestricted entry for DNA matching Lt. Commander Tuvok. Site to site transport limited to DNA matching Lt. Commander Tuvok."

"And her com unit?"

"At 17:00, incoming communications restricted to all persons except Lt. Commander Tuvok."

Even Chakotay is surprised by these measures. Getting rid of all her furniture made him suspect that B'Elanna was about to conduct some ritual and wanted to insure space. Plus, he considers that she probably needed the rations to replicate the necessary items for the ritual. He also realizes that she really isn't interested in whether or not leave is granted since it appears she's going to take it regardless and suppresses his laughter at that. 

The captain is shocked. Her mind goes back to Chakotay's veiled reference to B'Elanna's holo deck restrictions. Honestly, she hadn't thought about it in awhile. It was over two years ago and she seems fine. But this nonsense about refusing medical treatment because of honor and something about a death barge was too much. 

Katherine Janeway was as tolerant of alien customs and beliefs as anyone. She was a Starfleet captain, it was impossible for her not to be. But B'Elanna wouldn't give any details and refused to explain any of her mumbling while she was not lucid. [Its clear she does not want to be interrupted—what could she possibly be doing in there—except for Tuvok.]

"Chakotay, what's going on?"

"I haven't spoken to her."

"That's not an answer and you know it. I guess I can understand her not wanting to be bothered but why all these specific measures dealing with Tuvok? Even you aren't allowed entry. Why?"

He doesn't want to get into it but he knows that he's got to say something on B'Elanna's behalf. He's still caught between a rock and a hard place because he can't bring up the captain not trusting her without dishonoring her. [This is going to give me a headache.]

"The obvious answer would be that she doesn't want to see me until she's finished doing whatever she intends to do. As for Tuvok, there can be any number of reasons."

Janeway is not comfortable with Chakotay's reticence and apparent discomfort discussing this subject. That's never happened before. He is always vocal on her behalf. On behalf of any member of the crew. 

"Does this have anything to do with my restricting her holo deck privileges?"

"I can't discuss that."

Not the response she was expecting. She's genuinely confused,

"Please be more specific. I don't understand."

"Katherine, I voiced my opinion on the subject at the time as your first officer. It would...dishonor B'Elanna for me to address that issue in any way."

This gets her attention. Honor is not a word taken lightly with Klingons though her knowledge and understanding of their culture is limited, she's starting to get a clue.

"B'Elanna hasn't said anything to me about it. Honestly, I haven't thought about it too much. If she hasn't asked for the restrictions to be removed, there must not be a problem."

The way she is looking at him screams this is a question not a statement and your captain is waiting for an answer. He's dangerously close to a line he does not want to cross but knows he must say something. Hoping he's got the right words,

"It would dishonor her to ever speak of it." His expression pleads that she doesn't ask anything else.

This is news to her. She isn't going to press and nods that she gets it though she doesn't. Armed with a bit more information she gets back to the matter at hand.

"So, all of this unrestricted access for Tuvok is really for my benefit? She thinks I will either refuse her leave or will attempt to monitor her? Allowing Tuvok in is her way of pacifying me?"

He knows it isn't the most productive way for a first officer to deal with his captain but he's really trying not to fall off the fence on this one. Instead of answering he just stares at her blankly as if those were rhetorical questions and she isn't expecting an answer.

"Fine. I can take a hint. You might want to work on your facial expressions in the future. The eye twitch was a dead give away. I have no problem with you granting her leave. Something tells me you better hurry up because you'll be off the access list by 17:00."

At that, he did smile 'cause they both knew it was the truth. Leaving as quickly as he could to meet his deadline, Chakotay bolted for the turbo lift. After confirming that he was alone,

"Chakotay to Torres."

"Torres." Hoping for the best and bracing herself for the worst she waits impatiently.

"See you in two weeks."

"Thank you." 

After closing the connection she restricted his communications access even though she was certain he would not try to contact her again. Then she went back to organizing and arraigning all the necessary items. The twenty-four Varhamma pillar candles didn't require nearly as many repicator rations as she imagined. B'Elanna was more than a bit surprised to find a Federation ship actually had Adanji incense listed in the data base. Then she figured other species might simply appreciate the fragrance. For Klingons it had only one purpose. It was essential in performing _Mauk-to-'Vor_. Traditionally, honor is restored when a Warrior takes the life of the one who took the honor from their relative or close friend. That wasn't going to happen in this case as she was restoring honor to both her mother and herself. Instead, a blood letting was required. B'Elanna looked down at her ma'veq, the ceremonial knife specifically for _Mauk-to-'Vor_, and knew that was going to hurt. She thought about the oath she was going to swear and knew she better mean it. batlh potlh law' yIn potlh puS. "Honor is more important than life." After what she just experienced, B'Elanna had absolutely no problem with swearing those words. They were the truth and she was going to work everyday for the rest of her life to keep them.

She did not have much in the way of personal property. Before their ship was destroyed and they were forced to beam over to Voyager, the one thing B'Elanna did was rush to her quarters to grab her Qob SuvwI and her grandmother's Bat'leth. She carried those two things everywhere even though she hadn't opened the satchel in years. She never understood why she felt compelled to drag it everywhere she went across the Alpha quadrant since the day she left home for the academy but she did. 

Now she's in the Delta quadrant, of all places, and the day has finally come for her to face her only fear. Vulcans aren't the only species with protocols for addressing emotions, they're just more inclusive. The only restrictions Klingons place on emotions are external and that is a matter of personal preference depending on the circumstances. With the exception of fear. It is to be suppressed completely until such time as one is able to identify the cause of it and then it must be expelled by conquering it. Her disinterest in all things Klingon was rooted in many things but when she pealed back the protective layers and the lies she told herself she was forced to admit that it was really to hide her fear of not being accepted by other Klingons if she decided to live as one. It was the coward's way out but that didn't make it easy. 

Something inside her whispered that her grandmother anticipated this. L'Naan did not accept her daughter's choice to marry a human and disowned Miral for a time, refusing to speak with her. B'Elanna never knew the particulars but even Klingon children have enhanced hearing. She listened to some of her relatives tell the stories when they thought she was asleep or did not notice her crouching in the shadows. But when L'Naan learned that her daughter was pregnant she softened just a bit. After seeing that B'Elanna was Klingon and not human, she welcomed Miral back into the family and even gained a bit of civility in her address when speaking of her daughter's husband. Apparently, she no longer minded his inferior human genes after seeing her beautiful granddaughter and counted them as a blessing. 

B'Elanna didn't like spending time with most of her relatives on Qo'nos, save a cousin or two, except for her grandmother. She loved her and she always felt accepted with her. L'Naan took time with her to explain her family history and what it meant to be daughter of the Empire. Some of that was difficult to comprehend as a 6 year old, but she mostly just liked hearing her grandmother's stories. L'Naan taught her many things, or at least tried to, and she exposed her to many other things. 

Time with her grandmother made up for the 180 her mother did after her father walked out. Miral was determined to be the perfect Klingon even at the expense of her daughter. Rules started popping up everywhere all of a sudden. The day before her father walked out was the last time either of her parents touched her. That was the hardest rule for her to get. "Klingons don't hug." Her mother said it enough over the years that she didn't want to hear it again. The first time Miral mentioned it surprised B'Elanna and prompted her to respond, 

"Since you hugged me last week does that mean we weren't Klingon until today?"

Her mother said nothing but the look told B'Elanna not to go there again. She also felt it wise not to mention that L'Naan hugged her. But life conspired to kick B'Elanna Torres in the teeth again. A few months after her 8th birthday, her grandmother entered the halls of Sto-Vo-Kor. That was it. Her one positive link to all things Klingon disappeared. And Miral managed to do the impossible. She became even more intense, restrictive and as far as B'Elanna was concerned, a righteous pain in the neck. She could not wait to get away from home as soon as she could. 

Now her mother was gone. Gone to Gre'thor. Doomed to suffer an eternity for her daughter's dishonor. B'Elanna knew that was her fault. She saw the proof. She heard the charges and she was forced to relive and remember every single thing she did. She had confirmation with her very own eyes while on the Barge of the Dead. And even then, when she could have done something to prevent it, when she finally understood the truth of the situation, she was ripped away before she could restore the honor she took from her mother. 

B'Elanna could not turn her mind away from the thoughts going round in her head. Nor would she turn away from what she knew was the truth. As B'Elanna sat on the floor in her living room staring at the unopened Qob SuvwI before her; she knew it was time to confront the past and restore her own honor. Only then would the sins of the child be cleansed and Miral released from Gre'thor to rest in Sto-Vo-Kor. She knew she had to do this and for the first time in her life, she desperately wanted to channel the Klingon within hoping she would answer. Yes, the two weeks leave was necessary because she had rituals to perform for herself as much as for her mother. The gods are fickle and cruel some times but today they gave B'Elanna exactly what she always said she wanted. To be left alone. 

She said she did not need anyone else. She had not spoken to her mother once since she left home for Starfleet academy seven years ago. When her father left her mother he apparently forgot that he had a 5 year old daughter because it was 12 years before she heard a peep out of him. Returning to the dorm after class one day she had a message from him. What did a man say to his 17 year old daughter that he hadn't bothered to contact in years? Obviously not much more than some tripe about welcoming her to Starfleet and hoping she is doing well in her classes. When she got to the part where he wished her a rewarding and successful career in Starfleet, B'Elanna knew this was the big kiss off. She was less than 3 months into her first semester and he was wishing her well years into her career? Yeah, she wasn't stupid. He wasn't planning on keeping in touch and was discouraging her from trying. 

Though he would never admit it aloud, there are rare occasions when Tuvok is surprised. It is a misconception started by Vulcans that they do not have emotions. Vulcans experience emotions but they do not express them. Nor do they allow themselves to be ruled by them. That is the purpose of suppressing them. Logic and order were all that was necessary. Today, he was surprised. He did not show it but he was most definitely surprised. 

A copy of the incident report concerning Lt. Torres' accident during the away mission was forwarded to him almost immediately upon their return. He knew she was being treated in sick bay. He said nothing when one of his people reported that she refused treatment mumbling something about her mother, a death barge and that she needed to return. Even if they did not understand the significance of what they were hearing, he did. Tuvok was fairly certain that even the Doctor did not have information regarding this within his holo matrix or access to that information from the ship's computer. Initially, he wondered if she would confide in Commander Chakotay but dismissed that. He was a spiritual person and would be understanding of what he might piece together but he would have no specific knowledge or information. Lt. Torres was Klingon, she would not explain. 

Surprised again, Tuvok simply read the security report before him. He wasn't going to bother asking how B'Elanna got a hold of Level 9A security clearance codes. He was pretty sure she could make the ship do anything she wanted. Either that or it was something she acquired during her time with the Maquis. No, that was not what surprised him. The massive recycling she did was no surprise once he learned she requested leave. And he just _happened_ to read her formal petition. He knew what she was about to do. Even seeing his name listed within all those codes wasn't the big surprise. The thing that caused Tuvok to stare darn near open mouthed at his terminal was the fact that every single action Be'lanna Torres took after leaving sick bay was 100%, absolutely logical. He could find no fault with any of her actions and was impressed with her quick thinking and resourcefulness. 

Vulcans have been in space for several millennia. They made First Contact with Klingons centuries ago. As with many other species they encountered, after time, Vulcans gained a considerable amount of insight and knowledge about the particulars of their culture. The Vulcan High Command had sensitive information on every race within the Federation as well as many outside of it. Vulcans were present when humans made First Contact with Klingons and had a front row seat for the disaster that followed. Tuvok was a member of Starfleet prior to the signing of the Khitomer Accord over 80 years ago. His personal knowledge and understanding of the language, culture, beliefs and customs was extensive. While they were emotional and intense, they built a productive society and a strong Empire while expanding their boarders and influence throughout the Beta quadrant for over 1,000 years. Emotional as they are, it works for them. 

Because of his personal knowledge of certain Klingon beliefs, he had some understanding of what Lt. Torres was experiencing. He did not think that any human other than, perhaps, Jean Luc Picard would have picked up on the significance of what the Lt. was mumbling in her semi conscious state. Based on the actions of both Captain Janeway and the Doctor, he is certain they did not. 

He also knows Katherine Janeway. It will not take long for her to contact him once she learns of Lt. Torres' specific actions. Understanding the delicate nature of her situation and the extreme privacy something like this requires, not to mention the fact that her own honor is at stake; he attempts to prepare himself for the inquest he knows will take place. As if on cue,

"Janeway to Tuvok."

"Tuvok."

"I'd like to see you in my Ready room at your earliest convenience."

"I am on my way, captain."

"Understood. Janeway out."

After Chakotay left, the captain spent a few minutes trying to unravel some of the many revelations she witnessed today. Most of them did not make any sense. Even after checking the data base she still did not have nearly enough answers. She is aware that her First Officer harbors some resentment at B'Elanna's continued holo deck restrictions. How was she to know that it was a matter of honor? No, she did not regret her decision, it was her responsibility to do so at the time. What Janeway did not know is that it would not have been necessary to do anything to prevent B'Elanna's activity other than demand that the Lt. give her word of honor that she would not participate in any holo deck programs with the safety disengaged. 

What concerned her was that after checking the logs, she discovered that B'Elanna hadn't used the holo deck in over two years. It did not occur to her that she would not. She thought it was a computer error. Surely, that could not be possible. She knows that she has seen B'Elanna going to and from the holo deck. Then she took a few minutes to think about that. The captain remembers seeing her at Sandrines on a few occasions. She also attended the winter holiday party—after arm twisting and a formal notice that all senior staff were required to attend. [B'Elanna and Tuvok are alike in that one respect. If I don't issue a direct order, they wouldn't attend half the social gatherings on this ship!] Several minutes of searching confirmed that the only time B'Elanna initiated a holo deck program in the last two years was when she was working on an engineering problem, designing or testing some Borg technical upgrades or running diagnostics for the Doctor's program. 

"Nothing for herself. Not even an exercise program."

She wonders if this is the only way B'Elanna can guarantee that she won't slip into destructive behavior but Chakotay's unwillingness to discuss the matter made it clear that B'Elanna staying away from the holo deck had something to do with her honor rather than her emotional state. The captain just didn't get it. 

"What is she doing with all her holo deck time?"

A little more checking and she has her answer. Nothing. Its just sitting there accumulating. Five months worth of holo deck time. 

"Mr. Paris would have a heart attack if he ever found out about that!"

Setting that mystery aside, she tried to find information on the death barge. The only reference she located was for a Barge of the Dead. Unfortunately, there was nothing listed. No explanation and no citation to other sources. She checked and double checked, nothing. Only two Klingons ever attended Starfleet academy or served on a Federation ship. One of them was 65 thousand light years away at Deep Space 9. The other was hold up in her quarters doing god knows what. She'd get no answers from either of them. She considered asking Seven. The Borg assimilated Klingons, the Son of Kovar having personally made a quasi appearance on the ship, perhaps Seven would know. Then she decided that she should consult Tuvok on the matter first. She's fairly certain he has some knowledge of it. If it became necessary, she'd ask Seven later. 

"From the way B'Elanna refused to discuss the matter and wouldn't explain I assume its something personal. But there was plenty of information on Sto-Vo-Kor. That is the Klingon after world. Ugh!"

Before she could get too frustrated with her lack of information, the door to her Ready room chimed.

"Enter."

"You wished to see me, captain."

"Yes, Tuvok, have a seat." She's not sure how to play this but its Tuvok she's dealing with so she decides to just go for it.

"After being released from sick bay, B'Elanna requested and was granted two weeks leave. She didn't say why and Chakotay was not forthcoming with any details. Are you aware of your part in her leave?"

She's pretty sure he is. Everything she did would have been routed through to security and since he and Chakotay are the only ones with level 9 security clearance, he had to notice her changes.

"You are referring to the privacy restrictions on her quarters and communications?"

"Yes."

"I am aware of those."

She waited but he didn't say anything else. Was it just her or did anyone else find them strange? Taking a new tactic, she decides to gather some information from a real time source.

"When B'Elanna was first brought in to sick bay she was semi conscious and refused medical attention."

Still, Tuvok just stared at her blankly in his customary Vulcan manner but Janeway's instincts told her that he knew something.

"You don't find that strange?"

"Most of the things many people on this ship do rise to a level of strange quite often."

"She mumbled something about honor and a death barge. I checked the computer. There is a Klingon reference to something called a Barge of the Dead but there is no information listed. There are no other citations and there isn't even a file. You have more knowledge and experience with Klingons. Have you ever heard of it?"

"Yes."

The relief on her face was obvious. Now she wouldn't have to involve Seven and could just get the information from her friend.

"Well, what is it? And do you have any idea why she wouldn't talk about it or explain?"

"It is a very private matter among Klingons. It is expected that she would not speak of it."

"Are you stalling?"

"Vulcans do not stall."

"Fine. Is there a reason that you aren't forthcoming with information?"

"Yes."

"Tuvok, I don't want to pull teeth. Just give it to me straight."

Her colorful idioms were rewarded with a raised eyebrow before he began.

"As I said, it is a highly sensitive and extremely private matter among Klingons. She will not speak on the matter. Had she been fully conscious, you would not have this information."

"That's not an answer to my question. What could that possibly have to do with honor?"

Taking a few moments to phrase the answer in his head first,

"Everything with Klingons has to do with honor. It is complex."

She realizes two things. In the last 10 minutes, her friend and Chief Tactical Officer gave her absolutely no information and did not seem to have any intention of doing so. Moreover, it was apparent that he knows or suspects exactly what was going on.

"Do you find her privacy restrictions or that she has shut herself off from everyone except you the least bit strange?"

"No."

Resigned to his one word cryptic answers,

"Why?"

"Her actions were logical."

Nonplused, she can do nothing but stare. Tuvok, the Vulcan poster child, just said B'Elanna Torres— of all people—was acting logical! 

"You know what she's doing and why she's doing it?"

"Yes."

Knowing when she's beat,

"Fine. Is there any reason to worry about her? She has a history. Will she harm herself?"

"No."

"No to which question Tuvok!"

Sensing that his captain is just about at the end of her tether he takes a different approach.

"I have an understanding of what is occurring. She is in no danger. Her actions, as I said earlier, were both logical and necessary."

Forestalling the interruption he sees about to take place,

"We should do nothing to interfere with her leave for the next two weeks. She must not be disturbed for anything short of an order to abandon ship. This includes Red Alerts or any emergency in Engineering. We should act as if she is not on board Voyager until she exits her quarters. We should also safe guard her privacy and not disclose the information to others, even the senior staff, while alerting them that she is not to be disturbed. I believe this could qualify as medical leave to prevent others from encroaching on her privacy."

Then he clammed up and let her work through what he just said. He did not particularly like giving away this much information but he deemed it necessary to make the captain aware of the full extent of the delicateness of the situation.

Katherine Janeway did not expect Tuvok to say any of the things he just shared with her. She still did not understand anything that B'Elanna was up to or anything that occurred in sick bay but she did understand that Tuvok was serious in his recommendation. She would take it seriously.

"I don't understand but I trust your judgment. Is there anything else I need to know?"

"It would be...advisable that we never mention this or make any reference to it in the future."

"Whatever this is sounds serious. So be it, she won't hear a peep out of me. I'll speak to the Doctor after we're through and issue a gag order. From the way Chakotay sat here earlier tight lipped refusing to discuss certain things with me, I gathered that it was something but didn't know what."

Then she takes a minute to consider the holo deck restrictions and fills Tuvok in on what she just learned.

"That is understandable."

"Huh? Two years out here without using any of her personal holo deck time. You don't find that strange?"

"No. It is logical under the circumstances."

"You're gonna have to do better than that, old friend. I don't understand. She hasn't asked me to remove the restrictions and the only thing Chakotay would say was that he would not discuss the matter with me. Something about dishonoring B'Elanna."

He's silent for several moments but she caught the almost imperceptible nod.

"That is also logical. Now that I am aware of the situation I, too, do not think it prudent for me to comment on the subject. As I said earlier, everything with a Klingon has to do with honor. I would, however, advise that you not initiate a conversation with her on the subject."

"This makes no sense."

"Perhaps."

"Explain."

"It does not make sense to you because you lack certain facts and an in depth understanding of Klingon culture. It is completely logical to me because I do not."

"And Chakotay?"

"He was her captain and friend. You have an understanding of me and of Vulcan culture that others on this ship do not. Our situations are similar."

And that was all he intended to say on the matter. She got it.

"Fine. I won't pry and I'll take all of your advice. Anything else?"

"That is all."

"Alright, I've taken up enough of your off duty time. Go, enjoy your evening."

"Thank you captain. Enjoy yours as well."

With that, Tuvok rose and left slightly faster than normally.

"Everyone's trying to get away from me today!"

It did not take long, once everyone was assembled around the conference table, for the others to notice B'Elanna's absence or the presence of Lt. Carey in her place. The captain took an extensive amount of time informing the Doctor that the highest level of doctor patient privilege extended to B'Elanna's visit in sick bay as well as her medical leave. He was to make no comment or discuss it with anyone. His notes regarding her treatment were to reflect the barest information with no comments or observations by him. He was also to include a simple and vague notation in her file that she was on medical leave. That did not go over well.

"Captain, you can't be serious? There is no physical reason for Lt. Torres to be placed on medical leave. Now, if you are suggesting that there is a psychological reason, which I might agree to based on her refusal to accept treatment, then she needs to be evaluated. Other than that, I cannot falsify her records."

[Really, how unprofessional does she think I am!]

Squaring her shoulders,

"Doctor, I don't think you heard me so I'll give you a few minutes to review my words. Unless there is something wrong with your holo matrix that requires you to be taken off line for a full diagnostic? One that would most likely take at least two weeks to complete."

[So, its come to extortion around here. Whatever happened to the sanctity of the medical profession!]

"Ah yes, I believe that in my haste earlier I forgot to inform you that I placed Lt. Torres on medical leave. One can never be too sure with those types of injuries."

"That's what I thought."

"Hmph."

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

"As I recall, there was no mention of Lt. Torres refusing medical treatment and I don't recall her even being conscious when she arrived. And due to her medical condition, your recommendation was that she be allowed to convalesce in her quarters but is not to have any visitors or be disturbed in any way. No matter what, least she feel compelled to...prematurely end her leave in an effort to be available to her friends or to help out in Engineering when she requires extensive and uninterrupted rest."

"You seem to have a firm understanding of my diagnosis and recommendations even before I voice them."

"I expect you to address this at the staff meeting tomorrow once the subject of her absence arises."

"Of course."

"Good day Doctor."

With that she turns and waltzes out of sick bay. The doors close just as he utters,

"Same to you Mr. Hoffa."


	2. Secrets and Lies

There was general surprise from everyone around the table as the Doctor made his brief report. Well, surprise from everyone but the three most senior officers. Tom Paris didn't say anything but he's gotten pretty good at reading Tuvok over the last few months so he knew something was up. One glance at Chakotay and he could tell that the three of them were all in on it together and the Doctor was their scape goat. Paris sat silently but he was in sick bay when B'Elanna was beamed in. The others were walking wounded so he attended to them efficiently and released them within a matter of minutes. He knew that B'Elanna was refusing medical treatment and that the captain waited for her to loose consciousness and then ordered the Doctor to use any means necessary to save her. The Doctor was going on about Klingon beliefs ranking up there with Vulcan witch doctoring and tea leaves.

He said nothing, but he saw the look on B'Elanna's face when she regained consciousness and realized what was done. The captain and the Doctor were both trying to explain the situation but she shut down. She didn't want to hear anything they had to say as soon as she realized they did not honor her wishes. Paris also heard enough to understand that the captain was trying to question her about something she said earlier but she wouldn't talk. Something that had to do with her honor and having to return to the Barge of the Dead. Tom Paris didn't know B'Elanna well but he knew her long enough to know she didn't use the word lightly. Chakotay entered shortly after she left and his reaction to the Doctor's report made Tom suspect that he had some kind of understanding of what B'Elanna experienced and that he did not approve of the Doctor's actions even if he didn't voice it. Now she is on medical leave.

Paris was also on the bridge when Chakotay meet with the captain for some time then rushed to the turbo lift. He saw Tuvok enter about ½ later and noticed the way he left quickly after staying in there almost as long as Chakotay did. All his instincts screamed that something was definitely up and that neither of them were pleased with Captain Janeway or the Doctor. That was more than enough to put him on alert. Tuvok and Chakotay never agreed on anything!

The captain assigned Seven to help out in Engineering but was clear that no major changes or upgrades should be instituted unless it was an emergency. Seven merely nodded but she felt that was the captain's way of encouraging Lt. Torres' inefficient means of running her department. Neelix was immediately informed that Lt. Torres would not be in need of any "moralling" or care during her recovery. He was a bit put out but decided that after she returned to duty he'd devote a little extra time to her. Harry Kim was plain old concerned for his friend and hoped she'd be alright.

When the two weeks ended, B'Elanna returned to Engineering without a word or comment to anyone. She did not know she was supposed to check in with the Doctor first because she had no clue that her personal leave was changed to medical leave. It didn't matter. After the captain's strong arming, the Doctor was content to be left out of it and didn't say a word. Her staff was concerned about her the entire time. Everyone knew she hated sick bay and hated time away from Engineering. They all firmly believed she had no knowledge that Seven helped out during her absence because they were all certain that knowledge would have forced her from her sick bed. Little did they know B'Elanna Torres didn't have a bed anymore.

B'Elanna replicated a simple pallet and a pillow while she was putting all her other items together. After 2 weeks of sleeping on the pallet, she decided that it was much more agreeable than the bed and saw no need to change that. Plus, she liked having the additional replicator rations in reserve. She also secured two large pillows. One she would sit on while working since she wasn't going to return the couch, chairs or desk. The other she would use for meditation should the mood ever strike her. She supposed that it was only polite to offer one to a guest should she ever have company. That wasn't going to be a problem as Chakotay and Harry Kim were the only two people to ever enter her quarters.

That made her stop and think for a few minutes.

"185 people on board this ship. We've been in the Delta quadrant for over three years and only two people have ever dropped by." 

She mused while overseeing a complete diagnostic of all Engineering systems on her return. They all saw that one coming and prepared themselves a few days in advance. The Chief might have been ill and even managed to stay away during her recovery, but she would check every single piece of equipment and system as soon as she returned just to make sure nothing was out of place. For the most part, everything was in order. With the exception of passing out assignments, answering a few questions here and there, and stopping by to check in with each team, she said little throughout the entire shift. They did notice that she took a short break at exactly 11:58 and returned at 12:17. No one asked and it really didn't seem like a big deal. But, when she didn't stop for lunch, Nicolette wondered if the Chief actually thought those 19 minutes qualified as a lunch break. Smart enough not to stick her hand in the lion's mouth, she didn't say a word.

As the weeks went by, many people on Voyager started to notice subtle and not so subtle changes in a few of their senior officers. Vorik and Nicolette both saw a pattern to B'Elanna's day. She arrived at the same time as usual, continued to run a tight ship and remained several hours into Beta shift as she had for years but they both noted differences. Everyday for the past 6 weeks she took a break at 11:58 and returned at 12:17 unless there was a crisis. That was strange but not so strange compared to the one or two other difference. She was much quieter. Oh, she would still holler across that catwalk when she needed. But she wasn't hollering. She didn't loose her temper once. Normally, this type of behavior is preferred in a boss. But after 3 years, they did not know what to make of the change. Instead of creating a relaxed atmosphere, it made a few people edgy and nervous that she was planning something as soon as they got too comfortable. 

When Seven waltzed into Engineering two months later, everybody thought that was going to be the one thing to set things back to normal. They were...surprised.

"Lt. Torres, Captain Janeway ordered me to assist in Engineering today while you all realign the warp core and replace the gel packs in the forward nacelles."

Seven really did not want to hear the explosion that was sure to follow but waited nonetheless. B'Elanna was making some last minute changes in assignments when Seven arrived and hadn't looked up from her work station while she spoke. Uncharacteristically, B'Elanna looked up and nodded to Seven then glanced around briefly searching for something. Finally she turned back to Seven and handed her a data pad.

"This is the repair schedule at present. I'm still making a few adjustments so you have a choice. Would you prefer to stay here and monitor the progress or do you mind crawling through Jeffries tubes?"

It was a draw as to who was more stunned by those words. Everyone listened carefully while keeping one eye on the two women as they worked, certain that this would be the thing to set the chief off. Seven stood there staring at B'Elanna wondering where the hidden insult was. She briefly considered she was simply being set up but couldn't find anything in her words. Seven didn't know how to respond still supposing B'Elanna's attitude to be a trick. For her part, B'Elanna just stood there waiting. Finally deciding it best to flush her out,

"I have no preference. Which ever you decide."

"Ok, I planned to head up to the nacelles since Harry and I have already worked out our system of relaying information back and forth from the bridge. We're keeping an open com link. Make sure that you are patched in as well so that you can make adjustments down here."

Then she turned and picked up another pad, passing it to Seven without thinking. 

"I want to test the warp core last. Can you stay longer than Alpha shift if needed?"

Still shocked, "Yes."

"Fine. You can work from my station. Make a back up of the sensor logs and download it to a pad for me. I want to review our progress later. Thanks."

Then she turned to the group ready to pass out the finalized work schedule and assignments,

"Ok folks, step up and grab em while they're hot. Let's have nothing but assess and elbows for the next 8 hours. Vorik, you're with me."

Then she grabbed a tool kit, several gel packs, a utility belt and left. No one knew what that was all about and no one wanted to think too much on why it happened.

Captain Janeway sat on the bridge awaiting the explosive hail from one or both ladies but nothing came. She was sure Seven made it to Engineering by now. It wasn't that she was usurping B'Elanna's authority, she made the assignment because she felt that it would be best to have both of them working on the testing and upgrades. Janeway glanced at Chakotay after 15 minutes,

"You don't think they killed each other and the crew wasn't able to alert security?"

He noticed some major changes in B'Elanna over the past couple of months that seemed very positive but he had no illusions when it came to Seven. He didn't know what she did locked away in her quarters for 2 weeks but was pretty sure it didn't include Borg sensitivity training.

"No. The crew has a system worked out for just that possibility. They would have contacted security at first blood."

"Funny."

"I was serious."

"Oh. Well, what do you think is taking so long?"

"Haven't a clue."

"Torres to Bridge."

Janeway tossed Chakotay a look that said, 'here we go' then responded,

"Bridge."

"Hi captain. Harry, we're ready to start."

Everyone on the bridge sort of glances around because they heard the captain and Chakotay talking. Harry doesn't miss a beat.

"Hey B'Elanna. What's your position?"

"Junction 42A. I'm at 13."

"Standby." He sets those coordinates then responds,

"Ready when you are."

"Ok. Seven are you getting this?"

"Yes, we are ready. You may proceed."

"Fine, let's do it."

Nobody on the bridge really knows what's going on. Harry has better clue because he can see that Seven is logged in at B'Elanna's station. He isn't sure what that's all about but since B'Elanna doesn't seem to mind and is in a good mood, he doesn't care. Janeway just looked at Chakotay then leans in and whispers,

"What's going on?"

"I haven't a clue." And, he didn't. The captain couldn't let it go at that. Plus, B'Elanna shouldn't be working alone so she breaks in for a moment.

"B'Elanna, you aren't up there alone are you? And where is Seven?"

"Seven is coordinating things from main Engineering. Vorik is with me."

Captain Janeway had many questions after getting that bit of news but wasn't about to ask anything over the com link. Everyone seemed to be getting along so she wouldn't pry but it was still strange.

At 11:42 B'Elanna got an update from Harry on the last gel pack she and Vorik installed then responded.

"Ok, let's take a break. We'll resume at 12:30 if no one minds."

No one minded because everything was going according to schedule. No one outside of B'Elanna's crew had the slightest idea why she was calling for a break that early. It wasn't like her at all. Normally, the captain would have to insist that she stop working. At first they figured it was her lunch break but that didn't make any sense. As far up in the nacelles as they were, it would take 15 minutes to get out unless she initiated a site to site transport. But, that wasn't an option since she took transporters off line. Everyone in main Engineering knew why she called for a break they just didn't know what she was going to do. At exactly 12:30, B'Elanna hailed the bridge for an all clear to resume. Harry worked in Engineering several times over the last few months and knew she always took a 19 minute break at the same time each shift he was there. He didn't say anything the first few times but when it looked like a regular thing he quietly asked Nicolette.

"Your guess is as good as mine, or ours because we don't know. She's done that everyday for months since she returned from sick leave."

Concerned that it had something to do with her illness, he didn't say anything because he didn't want to put her on the spot. When preparing for the test, Harry anticipated that she'd do something like this. He was quick to respond because he wanted to cut off all speculation from the bridge crew, including the captain. It was obvious by her surprise that she didn't have a clue. Tuvok had his own suspicions. He had 'reports' of her precise movements and was all but certain of what she was doing. He, characteristically, said nothing.

"Alright B'Elanna, I'm ready when you are."

"Good. Seven, all clear?"

"We are ready." She too, was curious about the timing of the break and the fact that the Lt. asked for one. That was not normal behavior for her but she did not voice her questions. Knowing their exact location, she calculated that it would take ½ hour for B'Elanna to travel to and from that section of the ship. Finally, she considered that it was merely a bathroom break and that B'Elanna, too, had calculated the amount of time she would need. 

Two months before B'Elanna's injury and sick leave, Tuvok was not pleased to learn that his security training holo program was altered by Lt. Paris some time during their first year in the Delta quadrant. Nor was he pleased to learn most of the crew secretly treated it as a holo novel for entertainment purposes over the past three years. Nevertheless, he sat silently during the staff meeting as the captain praised him for the work and commented that she enjoyed it just as much as the others. 

"Captain, it was not intended for recreation purposes. I was merely preparing security for certain possibilities that might have arisen as a result of integrating the former Maquis members into Voyager's crew."

Chakotay didn't like that at all but he had to concede the wisdom behind Tuvok's actions from a security perspective. Silently, he wished his crew had prepared for something like that so they could have weeded out all the various Federation and Cardassian spies within their organization.

While Tuvok was as dismayed as a Vulcan could be by the crew's response, he had to admit that he was impressed with Lt. Paris' skill as a holo programer. His attention to detail was impeccable. Everything down to the smell of a plant or the exact taste of a beverage was perfect. When he commented on this, he wished he hadn't considering the captain's response.

"Well, that settles it gentlemen. Between Tuvok's creative mind at coming up with scenarios and Tom's programming abilities, I think we have a winning team. I, for one, can't wait to see what you two come up with next."

The look she gave them both indicated that it was a closed subject and they ought to get to it. Tuvok was dangerously close to internally sighing as the others started making suggestions for the next program. He said nothing and endured it with Vulcan stoicism while mentally calculating the precise amount of additional meditation time he would need to assimilate the oddities in human behavior that evening.

Tom didn't really say anything. When he first found the program he didn't really have much to do on board. It was during their second week in the Delta quadrant and he didn't have any friends. He was also trying to keep a low profile and stay away from the newly arrived Maquis members who all wanted his head on the block. He and Harry hadn't become friends yet and the day was pretty long and boring after his 8 hour shift on the bridge. That was one of the reasons he spent so much time in the holo deck or working on programs in his quarters. It filled in the time. Sandrines was his prize accomplishment and he was glad that the rest of the crew enjoyed it. That sort of took the heat off of him for awhile.

Well, until the captain pulled him aside and guilt tripped him into becoming the Cazon spy in order to flush out the Voyager spy. He had to lie to everyone, act like the screw up and jerk that he tried hard to make people forget he was and just generally be a pain in the ass. The only person on board who seemed the least bit concerned for him was Harry. Actually, Harry went out of his way to try to be there for him and it tore Tom up inside to play his part. Apparently, he did an Oscar winning performance because two years later people still remembered. All it did was stir up old resentment with the Maquis crew, especially those on the lower decks. Now, they really weren't sure if he was putting on an act or if he really would have thrown in with the winning side. His biggest problem was Chakotay. The things he had to say to him cut deep while reopening wounds that hadn't healed. It took a long time for Chakotay to get over his resentment that Tom betrayed them in order to get out of prison. 

No matter what the captain said to him at the time, Chakotay wouldn't believe Tom Paris hadn't sold them out. It took Seska taunting him that she tipped off Starfleet to Tom's Maquis cargo run, leading to his arrest and imprisonment, to cause him to ease up just a bit. Unfortunately, his part in the undercover mission broke all the trust they'd managed to build up between them over that first year or so on board. Everyone thought Tom Paris was an over privileged screw up who got by because his father was Admiral Paris. They didn't know the half of it. They didn't know what a crappy father he was and they didn't know what a crappy life he had. They didn't know that the Admiral didn't bother to show up at his son's trial or that he made it clear Tom Paris was no son of his and should get the maximum penalty. That was why he ended up in Auckland penal colony after his short lived Maquis career. 

Caldik Prime ruined his Starfleet career before it even got started but people weren't interested in the details of what really happened. He never shared them and he never discussed it. What was he supposed to say? He lied. Well, technically he didn't correct Starfleet academy investigators when they came up with their own conclusions of how the accident occurred. The investigation was completed while he was in a coma and after he woke up they handed him their findings for him to sign off on. He read it and knew it wasn't the truth. Red Squad was in an area executing a move they weren't supposed to be doing because it was banned by Starfleet for the very reason it failed. All of them died except Tom Paris and that was a testament to his skill as a pilot even during his academy days. He executed his movements perfectly but he still crash landed and those on board his shuttle died. The others did not fly as well as he did and several of them ended up getting caught in each other's "jet wash" before spinning out of control and burning up in the planet's atmosphere. 

On occasion former Maquis members and even Chakotay would throw the Caldik Prime incident in his face. Accusing him of getting his teammates killed then waltzing away scot free. It didn't work like that. He didn't consider any of what he was forced to live with as getting away with anything. The nightmares came like clock work every night and he relived the incident on a daily basis. He still had nightmares of mangled corpses that used to be his friends. They were his constant companions but he never said a word. No one seemed to remember that the only reason the truth came to light is because HE confessed. Yeah, it was after graduation and after he was assigned to the Enterprise, a posting he did not want but his father pulled strings and had him assigned without his knowledge or consent. The Board of Inquiry wasn't interested in the fact that he confessed to something that he had gotten away with for no other reason than it weighed heavily on his conscience. He was reprimanded, subject to disciplinary action and pretty much marked for life in Starfleet. He didn't last long after that. 

But even after being drummed out of Starfleet with no career options he had a chance to cut a deal and get a lighter sentence if he informed on the Maquis he didn't. He took it like a man. Or a condemned man, that is. So when Captain Janeway showed up offering him a chance to pilot Voyager on their mission to the Badlands to flush out his old comrades, he took the offer seriously. He knew they moved around a lot. He knew they knew he was arrested and imprisoned. They had to think he'd roll over on them. It had been an entire year, and he was new to their organization so it wasn't like he knew any sensitive information. Paris was certain that he couldn't give them anything. His one mistake was trying to ride the fence. He figured he could get out of prison for that one mission and have an opportunity to fly a star ship, something he knew he didn't have a snowball's chance in hell of ever doing again, while not lying to Captain Janeway or betraying the Maquis. His plan was to fly around in circles. How was he supposed to know Chakotay would still be there or that they'd get snatched up by that crazy Caretaker and whisked off to the Delta quadrant. He didn't even think Seven would have calculated the probability of that outcome as more than nil. 

Paris knew the captain made him that offer out of some misguided loyalty to her mentor. Paris could never understand how he treated his son worse than dirt his entire life but doted on Katherine Janeway from their first meeting. She was his protegee and the epitome of what he expected in a Starfleet cadet and later as an officer. She thought the sun rose and set by Eugene Paris. A mutual admiration society that caused Tom to suffer from eye strain on more than one occasion from rolling them too much. Nevertheless, she was always nice to him as a kid and when she was around, his father wasn't so...himself. That, alone, scored her major points in his book. 

So, when she came to him and proposed dragging him into her latest madness he could not refuse. He owed her his life. No one else wanted to be in the Delta quadrant except him. He had nothing waiting for him back in the Alpha quadrant except a scarlet O for outcast. Here, he got to do the one thing he loved and never thought he'd ever get to do again, fly a Federation star ship on a daily basis. For that, he'd put up with the crap from others of the crew. Or so he thought. He agreed because he couldn't refuse her anything. He begged her to tell Chakotay but she was firm that only Tuvok would know of the plan. Two years later he was still dealing with the fall out. Chakotay couldn't be mad at the captain and it was a waste of time to be mad at Tuvok who wouldn't even notice. That left Tom and he more than made up for his inability to punish the other two.

Working with Tuvok was...fun. That was not something he would have ever considered a possibility from spending time with a Vulcan but it was the truth. Vulcans don't judge. That's somehow connected to emotions, he supposes, because Tuvok didn't seem interested in dwelling on his past mistakes. He listened to his suggestions and was never disparaging when he did not think something would work. The other reason that he preferred time with Tuvok is that it wasn't emotionally charged. He didn't have to be "on" during their work sessions so he could just be Tom. He didn't get the impression that Tuvok was waiting for him to screw up or fail because that would have been illogical and unproductive. That caused him to let down his guard and drop the facade of 'good time Paris, golden boy' at the door. Until then, he hadn't realized how much of an emotional strain the act put on him. And, he hadn't realized how much he wanted to be done with it. That's why he sort of encouraged Tuvok to come up with more than one program even if they wouldn't release them all at once. The time they spent together took the edge off of the time he spent elsewhere on the ship and gave him a legitimate excuse not to be what everyone else expected.

Tuvok really hadn't worked with Mr. Paris at all and was not looking forward to it. It did not take long once they were behind closed doors in Tuvok's quarters to realize that the public face of Tom Paris was quite different from the private one. No one could question his skill as a pilot and it seemed to be his only redeeming quality at first glance. Tom Paris had gotten them out of near misses and certain death or capture on numerous occasions with maneuvers that weren't in Starfleet's pilot training manual. Tactical and the helm need to be in sync during combat maneuvers. The ship had to be in place for weapons to hit their target and it had to be out of the way to escape becoming a target. It took some time but they both began to anticipate each other. Truthfully, there wasn't much for the captain to do during those situations because she trusted both of them. She could see that they'd found their grove after some time and they always seemed to keep the ship moving and out of harms way while B'Elanna made sure that Voyager stayed in one piece and warp drive stayed on line long enough for them to get out of danger.

It was during their time working together that he sensed there was much more to the man who seemed shallow and transparent initially. Tuvok was not blind. He might not be emotional but that did not mean he could not see or appreciate how they affected others. The secret mission was necessary and critical for Voyager's survival. Tom Paris was the most likely and believable candidate for a traitor so his selection was logical. That didn't mean that Tuvok couldn't see what the experience might cost him on a personal level. He watched Paris' interaction with the captain from the moment he returned to the ship after their arrival in the Delta quadrant. While initially distrustful of his actions, he could see that Paris' loyalty was to Captain Janeway first and that it was unwavering. That also made him the logical selection. Tuvok was certain that he would agree to the plan if he were approached from a personal perspective rather than given an order. To date, he had not witnessed Tom Paris say no to Captain Janeway once.

Now that he had the opportunity to spend time with Paris away from other members of the crew he could discern that he was not a happy man. In fact, for one with an image of being the life of the party and center of social activity the man spent a great deal of time alone. Tuvok noticed that Tom spent his free time with Harry Kim or B'Elanna Torres when she decided to participate in an evening at Sandrines on occasion. He also noted that Lt. Paris ate most of his meals with Mr. Kim. Careful scrutiny and closer inspection revealed that those were the only people that he spent time with. He said nothing but Tuvok got the impression that Paris preferred spending time with him and that was why they continued working on different projects. The first one took a few months to complete due to their other duties and traveling through a particularly hostile area of space. Several weeks before finishing, Paris nonchalantly suggested that they start working on a follow-up while they were still in creative mode. He agreed. Truth be told, aside from his social time with Captain Janeway or assisting Seven, Tuvok spent a great deal of time alone as well. Partly because of his distaste for some of the more...colorful and illogical activities on board the ship. Partly because Vulcans were rarely at the top of the 'must invite to insure a good time' list. It did not bother him in the least as he found more productive ways of utilizing his time. It wasn't until after working with Paris that he considered the possibility that he might be missing out on some things. He decided to commit that observation to further study and evaluate his hypothesis at a later date.

If it were possible to pin point the shift in Tom Paris' overall personality and demeanor it would be after what he and several others referred to as the away mission from hell. Four months after B'Elanna's return from the Barge of the Dead, Tom was accused of murder. It seemed air tight and even Voyager's crew believed he did it. The only people who supported him were Harry, B'Elanna, and the captain—to an extent. She was in a predicament that caused her to balance the lives of her entire crew against the life of one man. They had nothing to exonerate him and even though she was grieved on a personal level, Tom was certain that she couldn't and wouldn't allow the others to suffer just for him. He didn't want them to. 

B'Elanna seemed more intense than usual in her defense of him to other members of the crew. They did not realize that she took the defense of her friend's honor very seriously. She had no proof but he swore he did not do it. She didn't need him to swear anything. She knew he didn't do it and she wouldn't allow anyone to comment otherwise in her presence. They knew to shut up and move along when she was in the room. Harry was just plain broken up about the whole thing. He was absolutely convinced that his friend was innocent though he couldn't offer anything to satisfy the authorities on the planet other than his word. It was getting them no where. When he offered to stay behind with Tom others were shocked. Tom and the captain refused to consider it. Harry didn't consider it a sacrifice, he considered it both his privilege and responsibility as his friend. He was still shut down from staying.

The one to save Tom Paris was Tuvok. One handy dandy mild meld and he had all the evidence they needed to catch the guilty party and expose an entire corrupt underground organization within the planet's government. Yeah, they felt like jerks after that but what could they do? They offered a general apology and told Voyager to collect their crew and scram from their system as soon as possible. They didn't need to be told twice. That experience was the straw that broke Tom Paris' back. He wasn't interested in dealing with any of them after that. Hell, even Chakotay thought he did it. That's when he realized that he only had three friends on board the ship and that'd probably be all he'd ever have. Tuvok wasn't interested in a thank you.

"Mr. Paris, I simply acted logically. There was one way to prove your innocence and I had the ability to do so."

"Yes, but you didn't think I was guilty when you initiated the mind meld did you?"

"No, I did not."

"That's a heck of a lot better than all but two other people on the ship. On some level, and I don't really want to think about how much, I think even the captain suspected that I might be guilty."

Vulcans do not lie but they do elect to withhold the truth rather than release information that would serve no logical purpose. He said nothing about his private discussions with the captain when she seemed to indicate that she, like others, thought he might have done it. That was one reason she spent so much time trying to work on a way for him to receive a reduced sentence from the death penalty instead of trying to track down the guilty party. Tuvok definitely believed Tom Paris did not need to know that piece of information if he was going to have any peace once returning to the ship.

"As I said, there is no need to thank me. It also serves no purpose to consider the thoughts of your fellow shipmates. You were exonerated and we are returning to the ship. Everyone knows that you are innocent."

"No, everyone knows that I got out of it. That, they can't help but notice since I won't be facing the firing squad at dawn. There will still be many people who will question whether this was one more time Tom Paris skated by. One more time when he lucked out of something that he was guilty of and got away scot free."

Tuvok immediately picked up on his tone and demeanor even though Lt. Paris did a commendable job at concealing his true feelings on the subject. The time that they spent working on the holo programs showed him a very different side of Tom Paris, one he was certain others did not see. It would be illogical for them to harbor certain feelings and beliefs about his character if they did. Then Tuvok considered that most of the crew rarely did what was logical. He also learned many things about Tom Paris during that mind meld that he did not know previously. It was not his intention to invade the man's privacy but he had to initiate a deep telepathic scan in order to uncover the truth of what occurred on the planet. In doing so, he had a greater understanding of the man before him. He was impressed that he suppressed those thoughts and emotions so well that his character seemed fixed and permanent in the minds of his shipmates. Until that moment, he had no idea of the extent of what he endured on board Voyager for the past few years or the price he payed for participating in the undercover operation. This caused Tuvok to re-evaluate the long established Vulcan theory that the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few. 

Tuvok also discovered something that would be shocking if he weren't Vulcan. How Starfleet Medical psych exams missed the fact that Tom Paris is empathic was beyond him. Now some of his choices and behavior made sense. His preference for limiting his friendship to Harry Kim who had a quiet and consistently pleasant disposition seemed logical. Tuvok also noted that he spent more time with B'Elanna Torres after her visit to the Barge of the Dead and her own change occurred. Finally, he considered Tom's willingness to work with Seven differently than others on the ship. He heard enough gossip to know that most people thought it was an attempt to insinuate himself in her life sexually. Tuvok surmised that because Seven rarely experienced strong emotions other than with Lt. Torres and the fact that she did not exude the same degree of disparagement toward him as other crewmen he preferred working with her. Finally, he considered that as a Vulcan, his own lack of emotions was a welcome respite from what he received from just about every person on board the ship. 

He also considered Commander Chakotay's personal animosity toward Paris in a different light. As a Vulcan, Tuvok is detached enough to observe the feelings of others even when they attempt to conceal them. Chakotay rarely attempted to conceal his distrust for Lt. Paris. Having to work and live in such a negatively charged atmosphere on a permanent basis with little hope for the situation changing had to weigh heavily on the man. At first, he wondered why Lt. Paris never mentioned his empathic ability. Then he correctly concluded that information was more dangerous to him than anyone else. Paris had enough to deal with picking up stray emotions from his detractors. He was certain that if some individuals learned of this ability they would simply turn it into a weapon by purposely sending him overwhelming negative thoughts and feelings on a consistent basis. Tuvok said nothing and resolved not to allude to what he inadvertently learned in any way. It was obvious that Lt. Paris intended to keep a great deal about himself well hidden. 

"Mr. Paris, the important thing is that you know you did not commit the crime and that you are free. What others may or may not believe is irrelevant. I have found that humans prefer their own opinions and beliefs to what is logical, factual and truthful. I believe the history of—Yellow Journalism on Earth is sufficient evidence of my proposition. You cannot control the thoughts of others. Only your own actions. Perhaps when we return to Voyager you would be interested in learning some simple meditation techniques that might assist you."

Tom thought about that for a few long moments. He wasn't sure it would help but he definitely thought it couldn't hurt. Maybe there was something to hanging out on the existential level that might help him shut out the growing negative vibes he was sure to pick up from most of the crew. It always happened like that. After that whole Cazon mess he had to practically shut himself off from the crew without making it look like he was hiding. Having to man the helm with Chakotay's eyes boring holes in the back of his neck darn near caused all his shields to crack and it took months to repair the damage. For a long time, Harry was the only person he could tolerate. This was going to be hell.

"Yeah, I think that's a good idea. Thanks."

Tuvok could almost see the path his thoughts were taking while he stood silently waiting for Paris to make up his mind. He was gratified that his suggestion was taken to heart and resolved to be of assistance in teaching him the basics to help him get through this latest blow to his psyche without revealing his true understanding of the seriousness of the situation. 


	3. Inspector Gadget

Some secrets don't get to remain a secret very long. More changes in B'Elanna were starting to be noticed by others outside of Engineering. The fact that she did not throw a colossal fit when the captain suggested that she and Seven work together made more than a few people suspicious that she was planning something. It has been 8 months since her injury and strange sick leave so her staff has decided that there is no other shoe to drop. They no longer paid any attention to her 19 minute break and probably would have considered it abnormal if she didn't take it. They simply worked around her schedule. Seven noticed while they were upgrading the forward nacelles and realigning the warp core 6 months ago. She never commented. On the few occasions that she was in Engineering, she realized that it was not a one time event and that the crew paid no attention to it. That did not stop her from being curious. She picked up on the fact that Lt. Torres never mentioned it or made any announcement as to where she was going or when she would be back. She also noticed that the crew continued working as if it were expected. 

Perhaps Seven would not be interested in Lt. Torres' actions if her attitude and behavior hadn't changed. B'Elanna still would not tolerate unauthorized changes to any ship's system or permit Seven's previous attempts at tinkering. For her part, Seven realized that, as inefficient as it was, if she simply submitted a request or asked Lt. Torres to make certain changes or systems upgrades to Astrometrics, B'Elanna would agree. Often times, if Seven stated exactly what she wanted, B'Elanna would simply allow her to make the changes on her own without submitting a request. She was not sure what to make of it and felt it necessary to consult and outside authority. Her disposition was just too much of an alteration in her previous continence to go unnoticed. 

Seven was not sure who would be best to pose her observation. The captain encouraged her to seek her out with questions on humanity and dealing with the crew on a personal level in her attempt to fit in. Some of her lessons were strange and the analogies she offered illogical. Tuvok was much better at answering her questions in a way she could understand, though he was not human and did not express emotions. Seven quickly learned that most of his thoughts and theories were based on many years of careful study as a neutral outside observer. She decided he would be the one to consult. Once she explained the situation to Tuvok he took a few minutes to compose his thoughts before answering. While he had some suspicions as to the root of Lt. Torres' change in disposition, he could not address them directly.

"On its face, some of the actions of many members of the crew, human or not, seem extremely illogical and inefficient. However, you have noticed that in the past you were unable to successfully carry out your desired changes without extreme opposition from Lt. Torres."

"Yes, we more often than not, ended up in arguments that either required the intervention of security or the captain to mediate before the situation was resolved."

"And you now find that simply making a request to Lt. Torres eliminates that?"

"Yes, she either agrees to make the changes during that shift or the next available one. At times, she simply allows me to do it myself without supervision as long as I record the exact systems I am altering and submit a report specifying the changes I made."

"Do you find her requirement that a report be filed of the changes you make logical?"

"I did not in the beginning but she explained that if she and her staff were unaware of any of my upgrades it could cause problems in other areas."

Seven shifts just a bit uncomfortably in her seat as she recalls her disregard for B'Elanna's rules early on and how that caused a complete power drain that shut down transporters and burned out several gel packs in numerous areas of the ship. Still she felt she had to defend herself,

"It is still an inefficient means of working. Within the Borg, one simply solved a problem when it occurred and there was no need to waste time discussing it or filing reports."

"Your logic is flawed."

That caused a high arching eyebrow in response.

"Explain."

"Borg exist within a collective. The hive mind insures that everyone is aware of the thoughts of others. Reports are filed but in a different manner. The problem is discussed but non verbally. The collective consciousness disseminates the information to everyone instantaneously. We are not a part of a collective. We are individuals."

Seven had not considered this at all. In all the time she was on board Voyager, the captain never presented the situation in this manner. 

"So you are saying that my actions were illogical, not Lt. Torres?"

"To some degree. Her reactions to you were emotional and unproductive as well. Everyone on board this ship is required to follow certain rules and procedures. That is the only way that we can function properly. As individuals, our performance does not rise to a level of efficiency as the Borg but we were not intended to do so. There are many things individuals can accomplish that the Borg never will. Applying Borg practices and logic to individuals is illogical."

"Thank you for that assessment I had not considered this. Do you have an opinion as to why Lt. Torres no longer yells at me or is no longer angered by my presence in Engineering?"

"Perhaps your willingness to be flexible has some bearing on the situation."

"No. She is the one who initiated a change in our interactions. She is the one who refrained from becoming angry when I entered Engineering the day we tested the upgrades to the warp core. She accepted my presence and asked if I had a preference as to where I wished to work for the day. Then she asked if I was available to remain beyond Alpha shift if necessary. Finally, she placed me in charge of her department and left."

Tuvok was not aware of this information though it is logical to conclude that Lt. Torres made some observations or decisions about preserving her own honor while working with Seven.

"Not all actions or situations require dissection. Have you responded positively to her attempts at creating a more efficient and less hostile work environment?"

"Yes. It was not my intention to do so but I found that I instinctively reacted to her behavior. She is a very skilled engineer and I find that her creative mind is able to make leaps of intuitive logic that I am not."

"Is that displeasing?"

"Not necessarily. I find myself questioning the validity of my abilities."

"How so?"

"I am artificially enhanced by the Borg. I have the knowledge of countless species within me. I have an eidetic memory and have assimilated everything I know about engineering or science from the Borg or this ship's computer core. Lt. Torres has none of those things. Her ability is natural. Her thought process seems chaotic at times but she consistently manages to create viable solutions to the most overwhelming problems. She also had no knowledge of Borg systems before I came aboard this ship and yet she is the one who works with the Doctor when I malfunction."

"It is an inefficient use of time to question your ability. You have all of the things you mentioned and you know why you have them. Perhaps you are learning that Borg principles are not applicable in all situations, especially among individuals. Your initial dismissal of everyone on board this ship, and especially Lt. Torres, as inefficient and inferior was not, perhaps, the most effective means of fostering a productive working environment. Vulcans working with humans centuries ago made the same mistakes. Had we simply observed that, while they are emotional beings who allow those feelings to rule them, it works for them at times. And they are at their most creative and most productive when they are allowed to experience their emotions. They are also at their most destructive. It is a...catch 22, I believe."

"Thank you. This has been most informative. Your assessment and counsel have been of great assistance to me over the past two years."

"I am gratified to be of assistance." 

Armed with these new insights and perspectives from Tuvok, Seven thought that closer attention to Lt. Torres was required. She noticed that as the Lt.'s attitude about her presence in Engineering changed, so did that of the crew. They greeted her as if she were welcome and not there to threaten their boss. She also noted that with the exception of Vorik, which is understandable as he is Vulcan, people smiled when they met her eye and were nicer to her. She was not sure what to make of this behavior but was certain that it was a direct result her interactions with Lt. Torres. 

"Interesting. Because she is nice to me, the crew has decided to be as well."

Then Seven admitted that she was nicer to them. She did not demand and she did not constantly point out deficiencies in their work. Once she accessed previous encounters she noticed that she did that a great deal in the past. Still, curiosity got the better of her and she wanted to know where Lt. Torres went for 19 minutes everyday during Alpha shift. She knew it was not her business but she hoped that it might give her some greater understanding as to the alteration in the Lt.'s behavior towards her. Knowing that B'Elanna had enhanced hearing, sight and olfactory senses, Seven kept a wide berth between them just in case. She watched B'Elanna leave Engineering on schedule and head down the corridor to the turbo lift. Knowing that she could not follow she checked the destination and noted that it stopped on deck 9. [Officer's quarters?] Seven was not sure where she thought B'Elanna was headed but she hadn't considered that she was going to her quarters. The computer verified that she was inside. At exactly 12:15, she left her quarters and returned to main Engineering. Seven had to admit that B'Elanna timed it perfectly. Exactly two minutes was needed to travel between Engineering and her quarters and B'Elanna factored in an additional two minutes for the return trip. Instead of solving the mystery, Seven had more of one. She could not figure out what B'Elanna was doing in her quarters that required precisely 15 minutes each day. 

It did not take long for her to put the pieces together after she started noticing other things about B'Elanna. Aside from her weekly social lessons with the Doctor, studies in humanity with the captain, time with Tuvok, and her recreational activity with Naomi Wildman, Seven spent the majority of her day working Astrometrics or finding other work on board the ship to do when she was not regenerating. This left her with a considerable amount of time in solitude. She would never phrase it as such but, for the first time in her life, Seven of Nine was bored. There could be no other reason to explain her growing obsession with unraveling the mystery that was B'Elanna Torres. No, she would never phrase it as such. If asked, Seven would merely state that she was engaged in a study of individuality to enhance her understanding and broaden her perspective of humanity. She conveniently left off the small part about B'Elanna being Klingon because it did not completely fit into the parameters of her alleged scientific experiment.

Once she took a closer look at Lt. Torres, Seven noticed that there were some changes in her physical appearance. From the time she arrived on Voyager, B'Elanna wore a short hair style known as a bob or a page boy. Both of these names sounded ridiculous to Seven and she saw no connection between the name and the style. The names did not conjure up a mental image that had anything to do with hair so she dismissed them as irrelevant and moved on. Now she noticed that Lt. Torres wore her hair pinned up in a manner similar to her own but not as—severe. She surmised that B'Elanna was no longer cutting her hair. That potential revelation gave her no information that would assist her in understanding the reasons Lt. Torres no longer engaged hostile interactions with her. 

As the weeks went by, Seven was gathering no new information to answer any of her questions. She briefly considered asking the Lt. why she was nice to her but decided against it. The Doctor spoke often about not 'rocking the boat'. It took some time for her to understand the concept but once he explained she was able to extract a clear picture from the imagery that the phrase induced. 

"Perhaps Lt. Torres has not noticed that she is no longer hostile toward me? It would be illogical to call it to her attention if she is likely to resume her previous behavior once she is made aware of the situation."

Seven decided that she should do something more productive than watching and speculating. The Doctor's social lesson #18, 'how to win friends and influence people', came to mind. Initially, she thought it was irrelevant. Why waste time with either of those concepts? The only time she spoke with Lt. Torres was during a shared project or when she had a request to make. But, the Doctor informed her that individuals are more likely to open the lines of communication and get to know one another during social outings. Seven had little interest in participating in the numerous social activities on board Voyager. She did notice that B'Elanna Torres shared her and Tuvok's reluctance to attend and only did so when the captain issued a direct order to senior staff. 

Seven was not so caught up in finding answers to her own dilemma to notice that Lt. Paris stopped suggesting recreation events several months ago. She could not determine the exact time but she was certain that he had not made any suggestion since the away mission where he was accused of murder. She also noted that he was less talkative than previously during staff meetings. They did not engage in idle chit chat when he plotted various navigation routes in Astrometrics as she anticipated he would feel compelled to do so. When she took a few more moments to search her memory she realized that he had not suggested any parties or social activities since he started working with Tuvok on the holo programs 13 months 1 week and 4 days ago. Filing that observation away, she went back to the task at hand.

After giving it considerable thought, Seven decided that she would suggest something that would seem natural for them to both participate in. Aside from something dealing with engineering there wasn't much else. Then Seven considered an exercise program. 

"She is Klingon. I know that she has a Bat'leth as she attacked me with it my first month on Voyager. Perhaps she would like to spar?"

Seven hoped that B'Elanna wouldn't see this as a challenge but merely an attempt to participate in an activity in which they were both familiar with. Seven was all but certain that no one else on board was proficient enough for the Lt. Seven timed her approach as perfectly as she could. She did not want to ask B'Elanna in the presence of others in case there was a negative reaction. She also did not want to say anything while B'Elanna was in a foul mood or distracted. Captain Janeway once explained the concept of having the home court advantage and Seven thought that B'Elanna would be more agreeable to the suggestion if she went to her in Engineering. Knowing her schedule, Seven set off about 30 minutes after Alpha shift ended when she was sure that B'Elanna would still be in her office working. That would insure relative privacy. [Unless she starts screaming.]

"Lt. Torres, may I speak with you for a moment?"

Hoping nothing's broken or in need of an overhaul right then, 

"Yeah, Seven. Come on in. What's up?"

Seven hadn't expected to get this far and had to come up with something quickly.

"I require a certain amount of regular exercise during the week. Captain Janeway and I used to play Velocity weekly but we have not in some time. I was wondering if you would like to participate in a recreational activity."

B'Elanna just stared. It was a surprise. She wasn't mad but she was surprised. She knew that at some point she was going to have to speak with Seven but she was not sure if the overture of a personal conversation would be welcome. Now that Seven has asked her to work out, she thinks it might be possible.

"I don't might working out but I'm no good at Velocity. I really don't know how to play."

"Actually, I thought perhaps we could work through one of the Klingon Bat'leth training programs. I have knowledge from the Borg and I started using those programs after I stopped playing Velocity."

Then she stopped talking and looked up at B'Elanna hoping that she hadn't said something offensive.

For her part, B'Elanna stared again. She wasn't sure why Seven made the suggestion but she was willing to take her at face value. She hadn't sparred in three years. The exercises she did in her quarters helped her to keep the movements but once the captain put the restrictions on her holo deck usage she did not return. She isn't sure how she feels about this but thinks it's a good idea.

"That's fine Seven. Its been a long time since I used any of those programs. I am severely out of practice."

That was news to Seven but she did not pry. She was implementing 'don't rock the boat' protocol.

"We can start at any level you desire. When are you available?"

Now that she had the offer put to her, B'Elanna was kind of excited about the prospect of sparing and couldn't conceal her enthusiasm.

"Well...how about this evening? Did you have plans?"

Much more than Seven hoped for. She never though Lt. Torres would agree.

"No. My evening is free. It is 16:30 now. How much time do you require to prepare?"

"Well, first you gotta check to see if one of the holo decks is available. I can finish this stuff any time. So I can leave whenever. It'll take me less than ½ to get ready. I've got my own armor and Bat'leth."

At that Seven raised an eyebrow graciously while the corners of her mouth twitched up ever so slightly,

"Yes, I remember."

B'Elanna laughed when she thought back on the day Seven had to be referring to then got serious.

"Those days are over Seven. I never apologized to you for that and I am sorry."

[An apology! She apologized to me?]

"You were sufficiently provoked. You reaction was logical."

Then Seven checked the availability and found that there was a 2 hour block of time available in exactly ½ so she reserved it and they both went off to get ready.

Seven replicated her own battle armor and Bat'leth two years ago for several reasons. Most importantly, she calculated that it was more efficient and less time consuming. She also contemplated the likelihood of Lt. Torres returning to finish the job one day and thought it prudent to be prepared to defend herself should that occur. 

At exactly 16:56, Seven of Nine unwittingly solved the mystery of B'Elanna Torres when they met in the hallway several yards from the holo deck. It was a sight to behold and caused every single head that passed B'Elanna Torres to turn and do a triple take. Dressed in full Klingon battle armor, carrying her Bat'leth with her long wavy mane of jet black hair flowing, B'Elanna Torres looked every bit a true Daughter of the Empire. And that's when all the pieces fell into place for Seven of Nine. She realized that for the last 11 months or so B'Elanna was slipping away to her quarters everyday to preform the Plea for the Dead. Seven never would have imagined that B'Elanna was conducting the mid day offering of prayers for her ancestors because the dead cannot rest if the living do not honor their memory. 

Now Seven understood that the changes in B'Elanna's attitude and behavior toward her were a matter of personal honor. Seven also realized that B'Elanna's acceptance of her offer to share a recreational activity and her apology earlier were also connected to her honor and appreciated the seriousness of the situation. As a result, Seven was determined not to do anything to ruin it. She did feel more secure in her conduct toward B'Elanna over the last few months. She was never certain before if the Lt. was lulling her into a false sense of security and would one day switch back to their old way of interacting. Now she understood that was not the case so she was firm in her resolve to return the honor B'Elanna was bestowing on her.

Seven made no comment other than an approving nod which B'Elanna returned. The blonde hair was a dead give way along with many other characteristics but B'Elanna was impressed that she looked the part—or as close to it as she could. This was also the first time B'Elanna had ever seen Seven with her hair down. In the beginning she wondered if it was always pinned up like that because she regenerated that way. But she wisely kept her mouth shut on that.

A few crewmen were concerned that Voyager's showdown at the OK Corral was finally here. News spread of Seven and B'Elanna with Bat'leths and not many people knew what to make of that. Yes, the past year had been the quietest since they were both on board but that was when they weren't armed! Tuvok was informed after several people contacted security with anonymous reports of Bat'leth sightings. He was not concerned and informed security to stand down and not get involved. 

"It appears they have found common ground. Apparently, Seven of Nine was the one thing to get B'Elanna back onto the holo deck."

He prepared himself for questions from the captain about what this might mean but hoped she would remain silent on the issue. 

Two hours later they both left the holo deck in good spirits. Both were starving and both were unaware of the stir they caused as they made their way straight to the mess hall for dinner.

"I am not in the mood for whatever creation Neelix has prepared for the evening."

"Yeah, its been a good evening so far, I don't want to ruin it either. We can always replicate something."

"True. Now that I am no longer required to consume the Doctor's liquid nutritional supplement, I have observed that Neelix takes personal offense to anyone choosing to replicate a meal instead of selecting one of his—preparations."

"Just ignore him. I do."

"A viable solution."

Just as they finished their conversation, they walked into the mess hall still unaware of the heads turning in their direction or the open mouth stares from every single person—with the exception of Tuvok. That didn't stop Tom Paris from staring and then turning to his look at his dinner companion.

"Does nothing cause you the slightest bit of surprise?"

It was a genuine and legitimate question considering the circumstances. Surprise is technically not an emotion as much as it is a state of awareness so he let that go. Over the past year he'd gotten to understand Tom Paris much better and he also understood human reaction to Vulcan non reaction better than he ever had. One thing he learned from Paris was that humans define certain words differently than Vulcans, thereby leading to confusion as to what is an emotion and what is not.

"Generally, yes. However, I had warning of this. Apparently the sight of Seven of Nine and B'Elanna Torres carrying Bat'leths is cause for great alarm."

"Funny. That's not what I meant. Look at B'Elanna. She's worn her hair pinned up for awhile so I never noticed before."

Tuvok wasn't offended. He discovered several months ago that Tom realized Vulcans do have a sense of humor that is merely masked as dry wit. Very subtle and very intentional. 

"Noticed what?"

"How Klingon she looks."

"Does that disturb you in some way?"

"Absolutely not. She looks fantastic. Seven doesn't look ½ bad herself. Those are definitely two women not to mess with."

"I agree they do appear to be formidable opponents."

"You can say that again."

Tuvok's suspicions seemed to be confirmed with nothing more than B'Elanna's appearance. Just as Seven's mystery was solved. He surmised that she was officially out of the closet, however unintentional her action today might have been. He approved. 

Neelix wasn't sure what any of this meant but kept close watch on both of them just in case they were about to commit some ritual fight to the death that must be engaged in or near a kitchen. Seven reserved a table in a way that caused Tuvok to raise his eyebrow, everyone else to jump in shock, and B'Elanna to laugh out loud. She pierced the table top by slamming her Bat'leth right in the center. Everyone got the point as the two ladies headed to the replicator. Once there she turned to Seven,

"Uh, I only replicate Klingon food. Will that offend you?"

Seven didn't miss a beat responding.

"Not at all. Perhaps a Klingon meal is in order for both of us. I have tried the Gagh. As I have never had the actual dish I am unsure how it is supposed to taste but I add a small amount of sodium to mine."

"Yeah, this isn't the best recipe. I re-calibrated the one in my quarters to exact specks. Other than that its pretty good. I say we go for it. How about a little non alcoholic Blood Wine for you?"

"Perfect."

Yeah, they turned heads and their meals could have turned stomach if others looked too closely at what they were eating. Once they saw the metal plates and mugs, everybody knew not to sneak a peek.

Chakotay wasn't sure what was going on when he and the captain entered the mess hall 15 minutes later to see the strange make up at two tables. As if Seven and B'Elanna's general appearance and the fact that they were together obviously sharing a Klingon meal wasn't enough to send him into hyper space. But then he glanced over and saw Tuvok and Tom Paris, of all people, looking as if they were having a pleasant dinner by choice and not by circumstance. [Great, my two least favorite people!]

Tuvok said nothing but he saw the captain and Chakotay enter out of the corner of his eye. Within moments he also saw Tom's back stiffen though he was facing in the opposite direction of the door and did not see them enter. Didn't matter. Chakotay sent off waves of dislike for Tom Paris. To his credit, Tuvok had to admit that Tom's reaction was imperceptible to everyone but him because he knew what was happening. Tom recovered almost immediately and continued as if nothing unpleasant occurred.

Captain Janeway noticed the odd pairings and made the rounds. Chakotay opted to skip their table and move straight over to speak to B'Elanna and Seven. Chakotay said nothing about the way they were dressed, the obvious Klingon meal before them or the fact that there was a Bat'leth firmly imbedded in the table. All things considered, it was a rather ordinary evening on Voyager.

Seven stopped by B'Elanna's quarters because they were reviewing the spectral designs for a new shuttle. Tom's idea. Something that would have more fire power, faster maneuvering, and stronger shielding than the standard Starfleet shuttles they kept losing. It was really the first step in his over-all plan which he hadn't yet discussed with the captain. Tom's a better empath than Tuvok suspected because he picks up Tuvok's fleeting emotions from time to time. It was just as he thought, Janeway didn't believe he was innocent either. He was getting over that just like he got over the need to wear the mask or play the game months ago. People noticed his routine and behavior had definitely changed. He didn't care. 

Now that Seven was hanging out with B'Elanna, she was hanging out with him and Harry as well. Harry was determined to master Kaltoh, a 3D Vulcan game of logic. Seven was silent in her skepticism after one look from B'Elanna. Tuvok was supportive in his own way.

"What you lack in skill you exceed in determination, Mr. Kim." 

Then Tuvok proceeded to wipe the proverbial floor with Harry once again. Tom laughed. He was a heck of a lot better. Then again, he and Tuvok had been playing for months. He's not sure but he thinks that the fact he was a lower level chess master helped. Tuvok agreed. They play chess on occasion and Tom wins just as much as he loses. 

Gracious, in a Vulcan sort of way, Tuvok offered a suggestion that might help Harry.

"The purpose of Kaltoh is to find the seeds of order in the mists of overwhelming chaos. I suggest you begin with Pleenok. It is a tool to designed assist in the training of primary Vulcan logic."

Harry considered that for a few minutes and then agreed.

"Ok, I'll study anything that will help build a foundation but that doesn't mean I'm not going to stop learning how to play this game."

"I will not attempt to discourage your valiant efforts."

Tom and Seven made eye contact before turning their gaze on Tuvok. Both were silently wondering how Tuvok was going to spin it once Harry found out Pleenok was a children's game. All they got in response was a blank stare. Tuvok was pretty sure he'd be hearing from Harry by the end of the night.

The first time Seven entered B'Elanna's quarters she was shocked. She'd only visited the captain and Tuvok's quarters but thought Starfleet was extreme in their distinction between rank.

"Lt. Torres?"

"B'Elanna. I told you to call me B'Elanna."

"B'Elanna. Does Starfleet normally place such a great distinction between accommodations for its officers or is this the result of you having once been a member of the Maquis and not an original Voyager crew member?"

Seven just could not see how Captain Janeway could allow her to live like this. Nothing but two pillows on the floor in the living room. She strode into the bedroom. A simple pallet and pillow roll. Seven noted the prayer alter and the betleH bey' (Bat'telh display) as well but knew those were added by B'Elanna. Even Seven, who lived in the cargo bay, had more items than this. Where was the famous Federation's sense of equality?

"Huh? Oh, no this is my version of redecorating. I doubt anyone else's quarters look like this."

"Explain."

"For personal reasons, I got rid of all my furniture awhile ago. I decided that I like it this way, more space. So I didn't change it back."

Seven would not question her on the subject further once B'Elanna mentioned personal reasons. She knew it would be an insult to do so. 

"It is efficient." And that's all she was prepared to say on the matter.

It took some time but they were able to work through all of Tom's calculations and iron out a few kinks in the design. B'Elanna and Seven were both impressed with his work. Neither of them realized that he had it in him. Of course, Seven worked with Tom enough over the past year that she sensed he was hiding some of his abilities though she could not understand why. One evening, Seven decided to discuss it with B'Elanna because she did not think that she should ask Tuvok considering their apparent close friendship and she did not feel comfortable questioning the captain about a member of her crew.

"We all hide Seven. Some times its easier that way. Some times we think its easier that way. I don't know what Tom's life was like growing up but I assume the pressure of being Admiral Paris' son was intense. Maybe he thought it was better to act average so that he wouldn't be pushed so hard by his father. From what I've heard, he wasn't a very nice man and didn't treat Tom well. That's just gossip and nothing you should ask Tom about. Family issues are delicate and sensitive matters among humans."

Seven thought for a few moments then decided to go there.

"Among Klingons I imagine as well."

B'Elanna's head shot up at that. But then she took a deep breath and exhaled.

"Yes. I had the privilege to be neither to most people. Klingons thought I was too human. Humans thought I was too Klingon. My parents didn't help the situation much."

"I apologize if I have treaded on a—painful subject. I am not always aware when my desire for understanding crosses into offense."

"You didn't offend me. You simply made me think about the truth. There was a time when I didn't know where I belonged. When I was afraid to be me because I feared rejection. I've been rejected most of my life."

"But that has changed?"

"Yes. Most definitely yes. I am Klingon. I am not ashamed of it. My human—sperm donor, because I can't call the guy who walked out on me 20 years ago and only bothered to contact me once a father, is inconsequential and irrelevant. Until I was 5, I've lived on a human colony where my mother and I were the only Klingons. It was difficult and children were cruel. I tried to act like them but was never accepted. After my parents split up, we moved to Qo'noS but for the last 8 years I've lived almost exclusively among humans so it was second nature to down play my Klingon heritage for their benefit. To make them feel more comfortable with me. Yeah, that's illogical considering one look at me and its obvious I'm Klingon. But, I hoped that if I acted human enough, tried to fit in enough, people would accept me or at least not judge me."

"You were unsuccessful?"

"Duh. No. Not anymore than anyone around here forgets you are Borg."

"True. I have learned not to dwell on it. Captain Janeway wishes for me to explore my humanity. I have done so but I am not interested in that any longer."

That was news to B'Elanna.

"Ok, so what are you interested in?"

"Exploring my individuality. I have no desire to become less Borg. That is not possible. Especially considering that I regenerate nightly in a Borg alcove and am treated by both the ship's doctor and the chief engineer. No one else on this ship can say that."

B'Elanna laughs.

"Yeah, that definitely makes you individual. Unique and one of a kind."

"The same things can be said about you."

"True. I'm not hiding anymore. And I'm not ashamed of who I am. Its taken a long time for me to get to this point but I am comfortable with myself and I am happy for the first time in my life."

Her expression is thoughtful and a bit unsure. Seven is learning to read B'Elanna as well as Harry Kim and Tom Paris. Harry is the easiest to read. He rarely attempts to conceal anything. She prompts,

"B'Elanna?"

"There is something I have been meaning to say to you for some time. I wasn't sure how to broach the subject and now that we've become friends, I don't want to mess that up."

Seven isn't sure where this is going. She was pleased with their friendship and enjoyed spending social time with Tuvok, Harry and Tom as a result of it. It was unsettling to think something B'Elanna might say would change that. Steeling herself, she opted to hear the truth because that was logical.

"You were implementing 'don't rock the boat' protocol with me?"

B'Elanna thought about that and laughed softly. 

"Yeah, I guess you could say that."

"Very well. What is it that you wish to say?"

She knew she had to say this. Correcting her behavior was only part of what was required. 

"When you first came on board, I did not want you here. You were still apart of the collective and a threat to the ship and crew. My hostility toward you was open and justified. But, after you were severed from the collective and became an individual, I was still hostile and went out of my way to be cruel. The simple truth is that I considered you a personal threat."

This was not what Seven expected to hear though she was unsure what she expected B'Elanna to say.

"Explain."

"I finally found a place where I belonged and felt secure. I was Chief Engineer of a Federation star ship. Granted, I got the job by virtue of being stuck in the Delta quadrant, but it was MY job. Then you showed up with your superior Borg efficiency and knowledge and I was scared that Captain Janeway might consider you the better person for the job and remove me. 

On a more personal note, the captain started spending more time with you. The time she used to spend with me. I know she was trying to help me fit in and get to know me better and that as time went on I didn't need the constant attention, but I still felt like I was being replaced. I felt like she was rejecting me like everyone else in my life had. So, instead of saying something to the captain or taking the time to consider that you needed time with her more than me, I took my anger out on you instead. There was no basis for me resenting you other than jealousy and that is dishonorable. I am sorry and I hope that you will forgive me."

"B'Elanna, I never considered the cause of your dislike for me. I did little to encourage any positive interactions between us. Over the past few months, I evaluated my own behavior after I arrived and it did not, as the Doctor says, earn me any points. A strange euphemism but accurate. I have also come to terms with the fact that I harbored a significant amount of jealousy toward your natural ability as an engineer when mine is the result of Borg enhancement. In truth, I admit that there were many times I purposefully and illogically antagonized you. I am unsure why I did so. On some level I believe it was based on your willingness to treat me the same as you would anyone else who behaved as I did. 

With the exception of Harry Kim and Tuvok, the crew feared or hated me. Captain Janeway was the only one who thought I had the potential to reclaim my humanity but on many levels she saw me as a child. You did not make allowances for my behavior or disregard for certain rules. You were not afraid to speak your mind or tell me exactly what you thought. Finally, you were the only person who expected me to live up to the same standards as everyone else. That was intriguing. No one else engaged me in conversation. Even though you were insulting or threatening to inflict great bodily harm, it was still a conversation.

As for my time with Captain Janeway, I did not know that she mentored you prior to my arrival. It is logical but I did not consider it. Neither of us acted honorably toward each other. I owe you an apology as well and am sorry."

B'Elanna was shocked. She truly had no idea that Seven, with all her Borg efficiency, was capable of being jealous of her ability. 

"So basically, both of us acted like dishonorable idiots for no reason. Apology accepted."

Relieved that she had restored some of her honor; B'Elanna sat back quietly absorbing the full extent of her own insecurities in the past. After several minutes Seven was compelled to break the silence because she did not understand its cause.

"B'Elanna, you have not spoken for 7.2 minutes. Is there a problem?"

"No. I've been thinking about something for a long time and I'm not sure how it will go over with others."

"Is it something of a personal nature?"

"More of a personal choice but yeah, it only effects me." 

"Then the opinions of others are irrelevant."

She can't help but smile, "You're right. I just didn't want to have to get into it with the captain. Chakotay I don't think would say anything and would probably understand. Even if he didn't understand, he knows me well enough to keep quiet."

Seven isn't sure she should ask so she adopts what she hopes is a supportive expression and nods like she's in on some big secret. B'Elanna laughs.

"We're gonna have to work on your expressions or you're gonna have to stick to the eyebrow thing. You want to know?"

"Only if it is something you wish to share."

"I don't care, it isn't a secret. Besides, I just made up my mind that I'm going to do it. I drafted it about 8 months ago but never submitted it."

She reaches over to a stack of padds on the floor then hands one to Seven. All she got was the classic raised eyebrow for a reaction but B'Elanna's starting to be able to tell them apart.

"This is a formal notice of name change."

"You no longer wish to be B'Elanna Torres?"

"Honestly Seven, I never was B'Elanna Torres. Maybe for about 6 months or so. Don't ask its an idiom. The point is, I'm not B'Elanna Torres. I am B'Elanna, daughter of Miral. Granddaughter of L'Naan."

"I do not believe Klingons traditionally include the grandparent in their address." Eyes shining with laughter.

B'Elanna cracked up.

"No, I just added that part for fun. You aren't the only one around here who gets to be an individual."

"I approve. The captain may not."

"Yeah, good thing its something that's submitted to the First Officer. Anyway, its none of her business but I know shell probably be dying to ask questions. You defacing one of the tables in the mess hall with your Bat'leth probably isn't going to help my situation."

"She will question your motives perhaps, not your right to do so. She still does not understand why I do not wish to adopt the name Annika Hanson. It is not my name. I am Seven of Nine and I am not ashamed of that."

"Ok, why does she care what you call yourself? You've been using the name for the last, what 19 years, that's a lot different from my situation."

"B'Elanna, we are the same age an yet, in Captain Janeway's eyes, I am less than 4 years old because that is all the time I have lived severed from the collective since I was assimilated at the age of 6. I may not have the experience with individuality that the rest of the crew has but I believe that there are many on board with less emotional maturity than I. 

I also believe she interprets it as a sign that I am unwilling to embrace my humanity. Perhaps she feels I am still clinging to the Borg because I am uncomfortable or unsure about human practices. There are many human practices that are foreign to me. I make mistakes constantly. Because I do not wish to dismiss or forget my Borg designation does not mean that I have any desire to return to the collective, I do not. I believe that is one of Captain Janeway's fears."

"Whoa, that's heavy stuff. I'm not sure I could even tackle that last part. Overall, I think you're doing ok in your Borg-human melding. Though I think you could probably make a better Klingon than human. But that's just my opinion."

"True. Klingons are much easier to understand. The language and customs are clear. The code of honor is clear and quite efficient. I understand all of the nuances of the culture and the practices. Humans are less—defined."

"Yeah, and I wondered why I could never figure out how to fit in with humans. I didn't understand them. You can't do anything about the captain's fears other than refrain from running through the ship hollering that you want to be a Borg drone again."

"You are not being helpful."

Once she pulled herself together and stopped laughing B'Elanna got serious.

"Sorry. Keep making your mistakes. There's really nothing you can do about that. Besides, you learn from each one of them. Its not your job to convince the captain. The only thing you have to do is be you."

"Sound advice. Perhaps you should apply that to your own situation."

"Nobody likes a smart ass."


	4. Its not a Banjo!

"It is deception."

"It is logical."

Tuvok is forced to sit back and consider what the universe is coming to when Tom Paris decides to lecture him on what is or is not logical.

"Explain."

"You and Seven speak the same language some times." Then Tom raised his hand to cut Tuvok off from what he knew would be a reminder that all of them spoke the same language, Federation Standard.

"Don't say it. Anyway, B'Elanna and Seven checked the design, Harry went over it too just to be sure. Technically, any one of them could present the proposal. They did just as much work as I did."

"It is deception."

"Mind singing a new tune? That record's played out."

There are times when Tom tests all of his Vulcan discipline. Tuvok darn near rolled his eyes in response to that. [We must stop meditating together. There is a reason there are no empaths on Vulcan.]

"It was your concept and your design. As with any responsible design engineer, you requested others verify your work. They did. It is no less your work. Asking B'Elanna or Seven to present it to the captain is a deception. It gives the appearance that one of them is responsible for the project."

"A) That's the whole point. B) You failed to refute my contention that it is logical because we both know that it is."

"Explain."

"We've discussed that. Anyway, there is no way that Captain Janeway or Chakotay—you do remember Chakotay don't you—would ever give the project serious consideration if they knew it was a Tom Paris creation and we both know it. This way, they come to a decision on the proposal based on the merits of the information in front of them. They aren't prejudiced by my involvement and they accept or pass on it for legitimate reasons. Tell me that isn't logical and I'll hand you a mirror and show you a Vulcan who lies."

Tom said nothing as he struggled to keep a straight face and pretend he did not see it but he was marking this day on his calendar as soon as he got back to his quarters. He decided that since the whole point is that Vulcans suppress and not express emotions he can't count what he feels come from Tuvok from time to time. He knows that technically, as an empath that's cheating. But this was a whole different ball game. His facial expression may have been neutral but Tom Paris knew exactly what he saw. Tuvok just rolled his eyes!

"Hey, Maquis wait up!"

She stopped and smiled. Only one person would holler that through the corridors of Voyager with its ticking time bomb of combustible mixed shipmates.

"Shake a leg Starfleet, I don't have a day."

"We need to talk."

He looked serious so she got serious.

"Ok, what's going on?"

"Its about Tom."

"ghuy'cha'! What happened?"

"No nothing like that." Then he looked around at the few people in the hall who decided not to even bother pretending that they weren't trying to listen in.

That group gave many people many things to talk about and speculate on for the past year. The only one who continued to seem normal and unchanged was Harry Kim. B'Elanna was just different. Ok, they knew she was half Klingon so no one, even her Maquis crew mates, were surprised that she spars with the Bat'leth once a week. Doing it with Seven is strange considering their history but they'll concede that the Borg is as strong as a Klingon so its understandable. But, seeing them hanging out together is just weird. And what is with B'Elanna??? The hair, the clothes. Its not just battle armor when she's on the holo deck. All her off duty clothes are the grey and black traditional Klingon clothes. She even wears the outer robes! Since when did SHE go Klingon? 

And then there was the notice of name change. Chakotay couldn't do anything but shake his head. He really didn't see that one coming though he guessed that it made sense. He knew the captain wouldn't think so. As much as Tuvok grates on his nerves [no that's not true he doesn't as much as he use to, I guess I just react out of habit now.] he intervened on B'Elanna's behalf and kept Katherine away from her. Chakotay isn't sure what Tuvok said specifically but Janeway told him enough to let him know that Tuvok knew a hell of a lot more than he did. He couldn't be mad about that because it was knowledge he had long before meeting B'Elanna and not something she told him. Then he wondered if Tuvok was actually welcome to spend time with her during her leave. No, he decided that didn't make any sense considering his instructions to the captain. Still, in the last several months he couldn't help but notice Tuvok spending time with B'Elanna and Seven in addition to Harry and Tom. He still has no clue what that last part is all about. Harry's too naive and too much of a nice guy. That explains why he's friends with Tom, the others he just doesn't get.

Chakotay knew to keep silent on that and many other things. Especially if he was going to slip this one by Katherine without her deciding that she needed to counsel B'Elanna on the matter first. Now that she has gone full Klingon, Chakotay's pretty sure the captain won't fair too well in the discussion. He's not sure how the rest of the crew will react but he also considers this is one of those times B'Elanna doesn't care so he won't either. He does see that its dated 8 months prior to this and considers that a good sign. It means this isn't a rush decision. He isn't saying a word. If she wanted his opnion on the matter, which he's certain she does not, she would have come to him first. That made him chuckle as he updated the crew manifest to reflect the name then set the ship's computer to do the same. This way anyone trying to reach Lt. Torres would be immediately informed that no such person exists since the formal change of name and that if they wished to be connected with Lt. B'Elanna they should resubmit their request. He figured it wouldn't take long to get around the ship. 

B'Elanna follows Harry's eye then tosses the death glare at the people trying to eavesdrop. They got it and moved on. Still, she didn't want to have this conversation in the hallway,

"Come on, we'll go to my place."

Harry just groaned. He kept forgetting to replicate a folding chair to take to B'Elanna's. Since she refuses to actually have any furniture in her quarters now he can't just stash something there. 

[We're gonna have to talk about this minimalist phase. Its lasting longer than a phase and it is so not in the Klingon handbook. I know they love their comforts!]

Once inside she points to the 'guest pillow' and tells him to take a seat.

"Want anything?"

"Nah, I'm fine."

"Ok, what's going on with Tom? Nobody's giving him headaches again?"

"Sort of. Look, he's planning on coming to either you or Seven or both if the first one says no and asking either or both of you to put your name on the proposal and submit it instead of him."

She didn't have to ask why he was doing that.

"What did Tuvok say?" 'Cause she's certain that Tom mentioned it to Tuvok first.

"Oh you'll love this. Tom finally wore him down with some logical argument."

"You're kidding right?"

"He's a Vulcan. He couldn't refute the logic though he did point out the potential for further disaster down the road when they feel he lied after they find out its his design."

"Tuvok's got him there, what's the problem?"

"Tom doesn't want credit for the project. He's used to getting dumped on or over looked. He just wants the thing built so he can fly it. Its all a part of his master plan."

"Master plan? Do I even want to know?"

"Actually you do, but trust me, you want him to tell you. Personally, I think its brilliant but what do I know, I'm not a pilot."

"Enough with the self deprecation Mr. Borg genius. So, what's the deal?"

"Obviously, I came to give you a heads up so you don't get suckered in by his logic. He really has been spending way too much time with Tuvok, he's starting to really get good at it." 

Then he snorted and shook his head cause he thought that was very funny considering how far they'd all come since the trip started. 

"Yeah. I'll say no. Technically, I have to say no anyway."

"Ethics?"

"Heck no. Klingon honor. There's actually a rule for this one."

"I'll take your word for it. I'm still struggling trying to learn the language."

"It gets easier with practice."

"How would you know? You've been speaking it your whole life!"

"Yeah and Korean is a breeze. Who the hell's idea was this anyway?"

"Seven's. Something about exploring our individuality instead of focusing on humanity."

"Yeah, remind me to yell at her about this later. Not really that difficult for her since she already speaks Klingon, Vulcan and I caught her—she was about to down load Korean directly into her neural processor from the ship's data base. Tried to get out of learning it the old fashion way but I put a stop to that. She can suffer like the rest of us. "

"That's one way of doing it. Tom's struggling with Vulcan and I'm sorry but I don't envy him one bit. Those people have never heard of a contraction, they have no idioms and 90 different meanings for the same word depending on the context and inflection. Their grammar is as precise as it gets. Tom shouldn't have given Tuvok a hard time about him probably not being able to learn German saying it's a romance language and requires emotion to get the true meaning across. He's paying for it now. We'll find a way to get back at Seven."

"Alright, you want me to go find Seven and warn her to say no?"

"No, I'll do that. Your job is to cut Tom off at the knees. Vulcans and Borg are completely susceptible to logical arguments. Those don't work on a Klingon. Feel free to whip out your Bat'leth to get your point across."

"I think I'm offended."

"Get over it. Look, the point is that as much as he says he doesn't care, it hurts. The fact that we all know there's a pretty good chance they won't take it seriously just because its his idea means there is a serious problem. Its been 4 years of hell for him and I'm sick of it. This is about taking a stand and supporting him in another way. He needs to know that he has friends who value his worth. I know that Chakotay is your friend but he has allowed his personal—illogical and false beliefs about Tom affect the way he treats a member of this crew in his OFFICIAL capacity as first officer. That is wrong. If we go along with Tom's plan we encourage behavior like that to continue. If Tom isn't ready to do it, I am. Its time to draw a line in the sand. That is the honorable thing to do isn't it?"

She could not suppress the smile that graced her features as she reached over and patted his arm. B'Elanna felt the same way about the general treatment of Tom by most of the crew. She now realizes that Chakotay must be concealing the extent of his true feelings about Tom in her presence. She knew how he felt about Tom when they first arrived on Voyager and how he felt after the nightmare that was Seska but Harry's words make her suspect that there is something else going on. Harry knew he had her hooked from the beginning but making it a matter of honor? [So, Harry Kim isn't above manipulation or emotional blackmail.] She definitely liked that.

"Everything you said is the truth. And yes, it is a matter of honor. Ours, Tom's, and our superiors' even if they do not realize it. Come on, I'll walk with you half way. Tom's gotta be in his quarters practically dancing a jig for out smarting Tuvok. Probably tweaking his argument for Seven. I'll talk to him."

"Thanks."

"Hey B'Elanna, what's up?" 

He's suspicious that he knows exactly what's up and plans to have a little talk with a stool pigeon named Harry when this is all over.

"Nope, leave Harry alone. He did the right thing. He did the honorable thing."

Tom immediately sees this conversation is going down hill fast. He hadn't worked on honor yet. Logic was easier and after getting by Tuvok he felt sufficiently prepared to bypass B'Elanna and simply present his request to Seven. This was putting a crimp in the plan. He exhaled deeply,

"Have a seat."

She takes a minute to size him up before she starts. B'Elanna definitely sees where his head is. He isn't fooling her one bit. 

[Harry was right, it hurts him more than he'll admit. This is his fear. Not all that other crap. This. Being rejected and scorned when he performs at or above his potential. When he allows the real Tom Paris out.]

Tom's shifting uncomfortably in his seat because she's looking at him like a huntress to her prey. He isn't sure what she sees but something in her expression lets him know she saw too much.

"I spent my whole life hiding. I stopped hiding a year ago and I'll never go back. I can't and I won't force you out of hiding. But I won't dishonor you or our friendship by helping you hide. I won't allow others to dishonor you either."

He couldn't speak. He couldn't look at her either because he knew she was right. He just didn't want to deal with the confrontation. He could move onto the next thing and not have to deal with it. That would be easier. Finally, he decided—well no it just slipped out before he could stop it. But for the first time in his life he consciously shared his secret with someone and prayed she'd make the connection and understand.

"I'm empathic." 

Just above a whisper but he knew that Klingon enhanced hearing would pick it up. Then he closed his eyes and dropped his head in his hands to wait for whatever was coming. Logically, he guessed it would be accepted but he never even told Tuvok because he did not want to risk him ending their friendship. What Vulcan would want someone around who could basically blow their cover whenever they got ready?

Both of her hearts clenched as her mind went into over-drive. Everything made sense. Every single thing made perfect sense! Then the overwhelming implications of what he just confessed settled. She didn't think about what harm she might cause as she instinctively reached over an clasped his hand wordlessly. Her mind was still racing super sonic. Finally, she pulled away from her thoughts.

"Forgive me."

That wasn't what he expected to hear. Nor did he expect B'Elanna to take his hand. But what really surprised him was that he picked up nothing. Physical contact always intensified the emotions he picked up from others. She was like a piece of toast. How that was possible for a Klingon he had no clue. They were the most emotionally expressive beings known to exist. Now he wonders what she meant.

"For what?"

"For not understanding the full extent of what you endure or how much you are keenly aware of the true feelings of others. Forgive me for pushing you to a point where you were compelled to admit this. I realize it's a secret. How you managed to keep it a secret your entire life, I can't imagine."

He didn't know what to say to that. So he just stared blankly at her. The only thought that came to him was kind of stupid.

"How come I couldn't sense any emotions from you when you first took my hand? I can now but not then."

"I'm not sure. I think its an engineer thing. Whenever I'm solving a problem, emotions get switched off and all energy is routed to the brain. I was running through all the various implications of this gift of yours. How strong are your shields? Do you think you can make it through the meeting tomorrow?"

"Huh?"

"Which part?"

"How does your mind work?"

"What?"

"You are all over the place. And you just accept it and moved on to shields."

"Yeah, what do I care if you're empathic? That's not exactly something that I should accept or reject. It just is. Besides, you're forgetting that I'm Klingon. We don't actually CARE if people sense our emotions. If you hadn't noticed we aren't the most emotionally repressive specie. Especially surface emotions. Unless we're being sneaky trying to hide something but that's another story and completely not relevant."

Then she takes a breath and looks at him gently,

"Um being an empath isn't the only secret you let slip just now Tom. I know the fear. I can relate and I can understand. But, unlike you, I don't have to feel what others feel. So, how do you want to play this?"

He has been completely thrown for a loop. Scrunching up his face, he just continues to stare at her harder. She figures she gave him a bit much with that one so she isn't going to push the issue. She's sure he's keeping it a secret from Tuvok. But something tells her Tuvok has to know. [Mind meld! Duh, Tom not too bright.] B'Elanna's not worried. This is just another case of Vulcan discretion. Khaless knows she relied on it in order to get leave. She's positive Janeway asked him and she's certain he said nothing. Doesn't take away from the fact that he knows. 

Defeated, he leans back against the couch with his eyes closed and his hands propped behind his head for support.

"What happens if they say no?"

"Then we think of something else. She's the captain. She can say no to anything she wants. It isn't a democracy around here. But, she can't do it without cause. Chakotay can seethe and snort all he wants, but it won't change the fact that this is a very good thing for Voyager and we need it. Harry mentioned something about this being Phase 1. Don't freak, that's all he said except that its something I definitely want you to fill me in on when you're ready. Whenever is good for me.

Don't forget I was in your position—sort of when we first came on board. Captain Janeway did not want me as chief engineer for no other reason than I was Maquis. She wouldn't listen to my suggestions and she probably feared I'd dump the warp core and try to take over the ship when you guys were sleeping. She wasn't the least bit subtle at concealing her feelings. I had to prove myself in the face of her sorely incompetent and inferior staff, I excelled."

Then she cracked up laughing at the look he gave her.

"Try to work on that low self esteem, B'Elanna."

"Seriously, this is a cross roads for you and a decision only you can make. Well, your friends are going to help you make part of the decision because I can guarantee that Harry nor Seven will present this. And you know I'm not. Should you decide to present it, know that we will back you up 100%. We have checked and double checked your figures and the designs. Its air tight and its brilliant. Pilots should design ships, you guys know what you need them to do in a pinch more than the rest of us. 

I cannot control what emotions Chakotay sends off. The only way for me to guess where he's at is to read his body language. But know this, I will personally shut him down and cut him off from any dissent that is not based on legitimate findings. I won't let him get away with any snide comments. 

Honestly, neither he nor the captain are in a position to challenge me or Seven on this. We ARE the experts. If either of them tries to make a decision right then, well we know they aren't doing it on the merits because that wouldn't be nearly enough time for either of them to read the specs. Neither of them can afford to loose credibility like that. Sure, they can say we don't have the resources. I can always point out that we will as soon as the next two standard Starfleet issued shuttles designed for peaceful commutes within the Alpha quadrant and not the random alien attacks of the week out here in the Delta quadrant get blown to hell and we salvage the scrap parts for recycling. How's that?"

"Not helping me with that last part." But he chuckles anyway.

"I know what else you're worried about. Them thinking it isn't your work. That you aren't smart enough to have come up with it. Well, Captain Janeway might not immediately realize the mistake saying that out loud would be but I think Chakotay will."

"Huh?"

"That would challenge my honor. It would accuse a Borg of lying and acting illogical. Neither of those are good things. Now, how do you want to play this?"

"I guess there's no other way for me to do it other than play it straight. Just back me up."

"nIteb Qob qaD jup 'e' chaw'be' SuvwI. A warrior does not let a friend face danger alone. Hey, you know we will stand by you. You should've heard Harry earlier. He is really fired up about this. He was damn near shouting from his soap box about drawing a line in the sand, equality and injustice. Something about honor. And if I were Chakotay, I'd stay the hell away from Harry Kim. He's fed up. Didn't know he had it in him."

Overwhelming. Tom couldn't believe it. Harry has always had his back. Has been with him 100% from the beginning of their friendship but hearing B'Elanna talk about him like this was heart warming considering everything else. 

Harry glanced around the conference table nervously as the time got closer for Tom to make his report. If he'd known his friend was empathic he would have tried a lot harder to suppress his concern. Neelix didn't know what was coming any more than the captain, Chakotay or the Doctor so he sat there in his normal good spirits. Tuvok and Seven were their usual impassive and stoic selves. Though he could almost swear there was a hint of something else that just barely touched Seven's eyes. B'Elanna was a different story. The fire and determination on her face all but assured Harry that she'd loaded her elephant gun and was ready to take down the big game if necessary. That was the one thing to cause him to relax completely. 

If the situation wasn't so serious from a personal perspective, Tom would have laughed at what he was feeling from his friends. Tuvok was calm and in complete control but he knew the man was preparing some logical course of action if he deemed intervention necessary. Seven was a surprise. Nothing in her appearance gave her away but he felt some steely conviction growing in her. He sort of wishes that he hadn't told B'Elanna his secret because she was wound up tighter than a coiled cobra ready to strike. He caught her eye and smiled when she started emotionally chanting, 'courage' in Klingon. And Harry. Truly the kindest person he'd ever met. He was fluctuating between warm fuzzies and some of whatever Seven had going on. Tom decided the two of them were spending way too much time together between him tutoring her in Korean and her helping him learning the finer points of Borg technology.

At the end of his standard weekly report he took a mental deep breath like Tuvok taught him and began.

"Before I finish, captain, I have something else to report."

That caught her attention. 

"Alright, Tom, what's up? Please don't tell me there's going to be a problem navigating our new course. This is the best thing we've come across in months."

"No captain. As I stated earlier, its all mapped out and baring the unexpected hostile alien of the week showing up to take a few shots at us, there shouldn't be a problem. This is a new item."

Then he passed out data padds containing his proposal.

"We're all aware that over the last 4 years we have lost a considerable number of shuttles. We keep replicating parts and constructing replacements. Its been a stop gap measure and in the long run, an inefficient use of our resources."

Neelix, Janeway, Chakotay and the Doctor looked up from their padds almost simultaneously and stared at him in response to his choice of words. Recovering quickly the captain addresses him,

"I'll assume the solution to that is what's on this padd."

"Yes. Starfleet designed those shuttles for Intrepid class ships. Voyager was not meant to be a deep space exploration vehicle. Nor was it intended to be a battle ship. Throughout the majority of this voyage, it has served as both. That cannot be helped due to our situation. B'Elanna and Seven have made significant upgrades to Voyager's shielding, warp drive and weapons with Borg technology over the last three years and that has saved us on more than a few occasions. 

Because we are alone out here, our shuttles are used more frequently than they were intended. Intrepid class shuttles weren't designed to withstand the beating they are taking in various atmospheres we enter that are unlike anything in the Alpha and Beta quadrants. They sustain a far greater amount of damage from foreign weapons fire they were not designed to deflect. My proposal is that we adapt to our unique situation.

Before you is a design for a new shuttle. More fire power and stronger shielding than the others. Faster speed with less strain on the engines or warp drive because of a significant change in the warp core itself. Its shape allows for greater maneuverability than a standard shuttle. The shielding concept is based both Federation and Borg technology. But I expanded the concept to include a type of biotechnology similar to that used by the Ugami. It would basically have a smart hull that learns from its engagements and automatically adjusts itself for the various types of energy based weapons it encounters. It would also conform to the diverse ion and polarized atmospheres it enters unlike our current shuttles. Plus, it is slightly larger than the Intrepid class and specifically crafted to fit our special needs. Think of it as a mini battle ship with all the comforts of a standard shuttle."

The four who knew what was going on sat silently waiting for whatever reaction the others would have. Janeway hadn't expect this. She had no idea Tom was working on anything innovative. B'Elanna was usually the one trying to upgrade something. She knew they had problems with their shuttles. The losses were turning into a morbid joke on board. [ How many shuttle craft accidents have we had in the last 4 years?] But she never thought of designing something different. Apparently, Tom had. Then she wonders why he's presenting the proposal instead of B'Elanna or Seven. Before she can ask the question, Chakotay does.

"I understand your interest in the possible creation of a new shuttle but why are you presenting it instead of Seven or B'Elanna?"

"Because I designed it."

"Not the structure or the interior, I'm talking about the actual concept. The science and engineering behind the cosmetics."

At this point, Harry really isn't feeling so good about the progress of the meeting. He really liked the way Tom laid everything out but he knew this was coming and was prepared to jump in if Tom looked ready to back down.

"That is what he's talking about Chakotay. He designed it."

Chakotay actually laughed. Janeway was stunned by this revelation and was caught up in trying to glance at the figures on her padd so that she could formulate some questions so she missed that. She didn't miss what followed.

"You actually expect us to believe that HE designed a new class of shuttle?"

Impassive as a Vulcan, Harry looked him straight in the eye,

"Yes."

The tone, while neutral, clearly indicated that he was absolutely serious. Neelix spoke up,

"Well, I'm no engineer but I think this is wonderful. Everything you've said is true. How we've managed to make it this far is nothing short of a miracle. I understand melding Federation and Borg technology. We've seen the results of that on this ship. Tom, how does the integration of Ugami technology work?"

Always the diplomat, Neelix can smooth out any situation and put out almost any fire. Tom smiled slightly and nodded at him. Once he finished his explanation, even B'Elanna was impressed and she already knew the plan. Janeway posed a question once he finished.

"Its been over a year since we encountered the Ugami and they weren't forthcoming with any of their technology. B'Elanna and I tried everything. How'd you manage this?"

"I'm a pilot. Pilots talk to pilots. While you and B'Elanna were dealing with the Ministry of Science I was taking a tour of one of their ships. They gave me a copy of their flight manual. In the context of trying to adapt some of their techniques, I realized many of their offensive maneuvers can't be executed by Voyager because of its design, size and engines. Plus, their biotechnology cannot be added to existing ship's functions so I started working on something that could include it from the beginning. Obviously, they didn't give me access to any of their technology other than explaining the basics of what a pilot needs to know about ship's functions. I pieced together most of it by extrapolating information in reverse. The finished product to the drawing board instead of the other way around. Then I incorporated what we know from Federation science and the Borg."

Chakotay still isn't satisfied.,

"Fine, you're a pilot. An accomplished pilot but that hardly qualifies you as a design engineer. How do we know this works? I'm still unclear as to how you actually came up with this when Seven and B'Elanna did not."

"The simple answer is that we don't know that it works in actuality until we build it and it flies any more than the Wright brothers knew they'd be a success at Kitty Hawk until their plane got off the ground and stayed in the air. We know that it works in theory because of the basic laws of science and physics. I created a holographic model. The program is listed at the bottom of my report so that you all can take a look and test it out for yourselves. As for the math, B'Elanna and Seven were kind enough to look over my proposal before I presented it and they say its sound."

That last part gets both Janeway and Chakotay nodding like they finally understand. She did not realize her mistake until it was too late.

"I see. So this was a joint project between the three of you. That makes sense now. The way you presented it initially gave the impression that it was your actual design instead of just your idea."

Tom said nothing to that. He sensed that she was willing to accept the proposal after coming to her own conclusions and that was all he cared about at this point. She and Chakotay were broadcasting their disbelief in breakneck waves up until this point and it was all he could do to keep it together.

B'Elanna had different ideas. She was pretty much fed up with the conversation to this point. She acknowledged that their reaction was expected and that Tom was doing a good job handling himself so she didn't butt in. Chakotay's self satisfied smirk made her want to reach across the table and slap it off.

"Captain, I think you misunderstood Tom. This is his idea. This is his creation. The concept, design and science behind it is all his. All Seven and I did was check what he gave us to see if the numbers were right like he said."

She lost her composure and stared at B'Elanna then turned her head to Tom. That made absolutely no sense. [He couldn't have come up with something like this! I couldn't have come up with something like this.] 

Chakotay went there.

"Tom is, as he said, a pilot. He isn't an engineer. You can't possibly expect us to believe that's all you and Seven did."

Seven's intervention was not only timely it was crucial because B'Elanna was about to shove Chakotay's a-koo-chee up his moya.

"Commander, perhaps you might want to clarify your statement for the benefit of others. If taken out of the context in which you surely must have intended, your words might suggest some dishonorable behavior on behalf of our chief engineer. Moreover, they might be misconstrued to indicate that our chief helmsman was attempting to perpetrate a fraud by failing to acknowledge the work of others. I believe Mr. Paris and B'Elanna stated that I merely verified the validity of the work presented to me and had no part in its conception or creation. It would be illogical for someone who created such an advanced and innovative design such as this to deny their contribution. If I did not know better, I would think I was being accused of acting illogical."

She stared him down with the full force of her Borgness and dared him not to comply. At this point, Janeway looked around the table and realized that at least three of her officers were preparing to circle the wagons around her helmsman. For the first time, she noted that Harry Kim was angry and was about to say something. One glance at Tuvok told her that he was well aware of this project and the mild look of displeasure was an indication of his disappointment in the turn the discussion had taken. Something told her that he was about as unhappy as a Vulcan can get and a good deal of that was directed at her. If she hadn't known him so long and so well she would have missed all of this. She also would have missed the look that passed between him and Tom. That meant all five of them knew this was his project.

Captain Janeway didn't let Chakotay answer nor would she allow the situation to escalate. Honestly she missed a great deal of the looks that must have been passed around while the scientist in her was reading through Tom's proposal. Even Neelix looked dissatisfied. Absently, she noted that Tom seemed to be the least affected by what was playing out. [Figures, nothing bothers him.]

"Of course, not Seven. Chakotay nor I had any idea a solution to the travesty that is our shuttle craft compliment was being addressed so the general proposal might have taken us both by surprise. No one is accusing anyone of anything. As Chakotay mention, Tom, you are perhaps the best pilot I have ever encountered. We've known each other for some time and I had no idea you had an interest or skill in design engineering. That was another surprise. I have not had time to review the information as thoroughly as is obviously warranted but the need exists. If Seven and B'Elanna say the work is sound, I'll take your word for it at this point. We do have to conserve our resources as much as a solution is needed some times stop gap measures are all we can hope for at times. I'll take some time later and review this in greater detail."

Tom didn't say one word. He met her eye casually and nodded. Then she returned to the business at hand.

"Well, if there's nothing else people, this meeting is adjourned."

Tom was grateful that this meeting took place after Alpha shift so he didn't have to go back to the bridge. Honestly, he didn't think he could have manned the helm even if he set the ship on autopilot. As unaffected and casual as always Tom Paris, good time golden boy, rose from his seat and walked out laughing with Neelix about something. Seven nonchalantly took B'Elanna's arm with her Borg enhanced hand in a vice grip and led her from the room before she could do something that would insure at least an overnight stay in the brig once she saw her stalking toward Chakotay like a panther ready to pounce. Seven wanted to pounce herself, but the momentary gratification might do more harm than good to Tom's proposal. She did notice that Tuvok caught Harry's eye and prevented him from following Tom with a subtle shake of his head. This assured her that Tom was more affected than he let on. It also gave her cause to suspect that Tuvok had a greater understanding of Tom than she originally thought. She did not miss the look he gave the captain and hoped that Tom saw it as well. 

In a whisper intended only for Klingon ears Seven spoke to B'Elanna as soon as they were far enough away from Chakotay to assure her that B'Elanna wouldn't snap and lung forward.

"Not one word for the next 6.1 minutes." 

It was a struggle for B'Elanna not to scream at Seven. But she darn near cracked her tooth clenching her jaw so tightly. She had no idea what 6.1 minutes could possibly accomplish, the captain wasn't even around. Even though she finally nodded her compliance, B'Elanna noted that Seven still hadn't released her arm. [She is so gonna pay for this later!] Six minutes later she got the point as they entered the holo deck. Once the doors shut behind them Seven disengaged herself and turned to her recent captive,

"You may speak."

All she got in return was an extensive, yet impressive, string of Klingon expletives. Shortly followed by a battle cry that could have awoken Khaless himself. Seven remained silent as B'Elanna called up a program knowing that she was in for a hell of a workout. B'Elanna did not disappoint.

"Why'd you stop me? It was just an act. You have to know that he's upset."

Harry is not getting this. He's madder than he's ever been in his life at this point and does not want a lecture on logical behavior.

"Precisely."

"Tuvok, you're gonna have to do better than that. It doesn't answer the question."

"Mr. Paris is upset. There is no question that he was merely concealing his true feelings. However, you are upset as well. In your present condition, I am uncertain that you will be of any assistance."

Harry closed his eyes and counted to ten. He knew Tuvok was right. Whenever he was upset, Tom spent all his energy making him feel better. Harry realized that would happen now instead of him being there for his friend.

"You're right. But, I'm not sure he ought to be alone. He was expecting something but I don't think even he was prepared for Chakotay to be such a jerk or the captain to leave him hanging like that."

"Perhaps. We cannot change what occurred. All we can do is be supportive. It appears that Mr. Paris would prefer not to show any indication of his true feelings at this time. As his closest friend, you understand."

"Yeah. I get it. Still doesn't make it right. Nor does it change the fact that he shouldn't be alone."

"I will pay him a visit and assess the situation. I believe that Seven has most likely taken B'Elanna to the holo deck. It would seem the most logical course of action."

"And safest. I think she was going to attack Chakotay in there."

"Indeed, that was a possibility. Might I suggest you find an outlet for your—frustration before meeting with Mr. Paris."

"Ok, that would probably be a good idea. I never get worked up so I have no idea what I'm capable of saying."

Tuvok merely nodded. He was unprepared to see this degree of what could almost be characterized as anger from Harry Kim. On any other human, Tuvok would classify it as extreme irritation. For Mr. Kim, however, it exceeded what Naomi Wildman referred to as 'hoppin mad'. 

As they parted, Tuvok took a few moments to evaluate the situation from all perspectives. His concern over some things he witnessed over the past few months was growing. There was definitely a problem between the First Officer and the helmsman. Personal issues had no place in the chain of command. He was gratified to note that Tom conducted himself admirably. B'Elanna also restrained herself. Though he acknowledges that was with iron will. If he could be proud, he would be of Seven's response. Diplomatic words conveyed with just enough force to communicate the displeasure behind them. Inventive. The captain was another story. Tuvok knew her better than anyone and he knew her longest. She was taken by surprise and the proposal in front of her was distracting enough that she missed one or two of the scenes playing out around her. Tuvok is assured that she is unaware of the extent of Commander Chakotay's true feelings for Tom Paris. He makes a mental note to observe the situation closer as he checks Tom's location.

He really did not have to do that. Tuvok was certain that the public facade would not last long and that Tom would head for his quarters as soon as he could without calling attention to himself. This was an extremely delicate situation. While he remained silent on all of the personal observations and

discoveries he'd made about Tom Paris over the past year or so, he recognized that Tom had no knowledge of this. He also recognized that out of respect for his Vulcan sensibilities, Tom would be careful not to show any emotion or reveal his true feelings. In this respect, one of the others would seem the most logical choice. However, the fact that Tom is an empath rules them out. The emotions of the others, especially Harry Kim or B'Elanna, might cause complete sensory overload. And, Tuvok was uncertain as to how prepared Tom was before going into the meeting. He only had one day since he planned on passing the work off as B'Elanna or Seven's. That was not nearly enough time considering everything else Tom Paris had to keep out. On more than one occasion Tuvok marveled how he did it and managed to retain his sanity. Secretly, that was one of Tuvok's greatest concerns.

Tom sat quietly on the couch in his living room in the dark. That was one of the good and bad things about space. It was always dark so when the lights were out, you were on your own. He thought about that ironically. He'd always been on his own. In the real way that counts. There was only one thing worse than being alone. Being alone in a crowd. The last several months weren't like that. He always had Harry. Now he was able to relax with Seven, Tuvok and B'Elanna. He almost smiled at the thought of B'Elanna. He saw her out of the corner of his eye. If she'd had her Bat'leth Voyager would have one headless First Officer and Lt. Carey would finally get that promotion. While he was glad for his friends, and he didn't miss Tuvok's looks to Captain Janeway or his constant and supportive presence he was sending off, it did not change the undeniable facts. He went out on a limb and it was snapped like a twig. 

He'd almost convinced himself that he'd be taken seriously after he started laying out the reasoning behind his plan. Neelix was a godsend and he'd thanked him as they headed to the turbo lift then immediately returned to some funny story to keep the man from seeing what was really going on. Tom didn't have high hopes for Phase One getting off the ground. The captain's words were neutral, diplomatic and full of everything a captain's should be. Her utter disbelief in his ability and potential cut him much deeper than he thought it would. Deeper than it should have logically because she was right. She didn't know that he had an interest or ability in design engineering. Emotions are rarely logical. It still hurt. And Chakotay. Tom knew that ship of acceptance sailed a long time ago. Why did the man hate him so much? It wasn't even hate. It was what he felt coming from his father. A belief, no a conviction, that he was utterly worthless with no redeeming qualities or value. 

Tom was so preoccupied castigating himself for all his deficiencies and worthlessness that he did not hear the door chime several times. Nor did he hear it open or a see his visitor step in because his head was resting in his hands. It was too much. He was sick of it. Even when he tried to do something right he got kicked in the teeth. He thought the delta quadrant was his salvation. The place to start over and make something of himself. He was stuck on this ship with 179 people all feeling the same things to some degree or another. Then he decided he should amend that to 180 because he was feeling the same things they were. He momentarily considered raising it to 181 but thought better of it as Naomi Wildman still liked him. [Give her a few more months, that will change.]

"Tom."

The voice startled him as he looked up to see Tuvok standing there and wondered how he got in. Then he discarded that thought once mortification set in and he realized he'd been crying. [Way to go Tom. Physical evidence of emotional behavior in front of a Vulcan does not insure their continued acceptance of your presence in their life!] It was kinda hard to be slick about it but he wiped the tears away hoping that the dark masked them. Then he realized that since he was sitting with his back directly in front of the view port, the stars were probably doing a good job of ratting him out. Still, Tom Paris wasn't the Oscar winning performer for nothing. He'd give a really good show and Tuvok could get back to whatever he most certainly wished he were doing instead of subjecting himself to this scene. Hoping his voice wouldn't crack,

"Hey, Tuvok. I didn't hear you come in."

"Apparently."

"Well, humans are known to day dream from time to time. Lack of concentration and all."

Tuvok had plenty of time to evaluate him before he spoke. The fact that his request for entry went unnoticed and not simply ignored spoke volumes of Tom Paris' state of mind. His physical appearance filled in the rest of the story. Tuvok did not miss the casual way Tom attempted to conceal the evidence of his tears. He is almost certain that whatever level of mental shields he managed to erect and fortify were about to crumble. What he saw was someone barely holding on. That was not good for many reasons. If the walls fell completely he would have no protection from any of the emotions expressed by anyone on the ship including himself and the other Vulcans. That kind of unexpected cacophony would be nothing more than a full psychic assault. He knew what that was like from conducting a mild meld on the one of the Betazoid members of the crew. Tuvok almost did not survive the onslaught of thoughts and emotions that crashed into him. He was unable to control the overwhelming images sent to him which provoked violent emotions in him.

It took weeks of intense mediation after medical treatment to recreate his mental barriers. And Tuvok was better trained than Tom with longer experience. As a candidate for the Kolinahr, he practiced intense ritualistic meditations for hours on end in the preparation for learning to purge all emotions from him. True, he abandoned the teaching and left the temple because his true interest lay in space exploration so he joined Starfleet. But his training formed the basis of his expert meditation skills and he was more advanced than most Vulcans his age. Tuvok did not know who assisted Tom Paris in his training but he suspected no one until perhaps later in life. It was obvious that even his parents did not know. He's certain that Admiral Paris would have had Tom training in the diplomatic corps, grooming him for an ambassadorial assignment one day, instead of flying star ships if he knew. 

Tuvok made a judgment call that was logical and necessary. Humans were rarely logical though Tom worked hard at when he chose to. He was not sure how Tom would react but the greater good was at stake. The potential fall out from revealing his knowledge of Tom's secret was outweighed by what would most likely occur if he did not intervene. Tuvok decided that they would deal with that later. Choosing his words carefully so that he could get his point across while assuring his friend that his discretion was secured, he set about mitigating the damage before it became irreversible. He also decided that a more formal address might help Tom retain his pride while accepting that his secret was not a secret.

"Mr. Paris, there are approximately 185 beings on this ship. All of them experience some degree of emotion at times. Even the Vulcans on board. If your empathic shielding is severally weakened or destroyed the resulting psychological damage will be sever and permanent."

Tuvok said nothing else as he waited for full understanding to register. He knew Tom Paris well enough to surmise that he was engaging in fruitless mental backpedaling in an attempt to formulate some argument intended to dissuade him of his assumption. When Tom's head snapped up Tuvok instantly saw that he was about to feign ignorance. He believed it prudent to cut off all denials that would do nothing but waste time that was obviously critical. He could see the struggle within as Tom fought for some measure of control. Admirable but ultimately pointless. He merely raised his eyebrow in response. A Vulcan gesture meant to convey that the 'jig was up.'

"How long?"

He knew Tom would want to know. Though Tuvok thought it served little purpose, he wouldn't lie to him. Plus, he figured that the sooner they got through these questions, the sooner he could be of assistance and Mr. Paris would be strong enough to meditate on his own for a few hours to make up the difference in his own way.

"I inadvertently learned during our mind meld. It was not my intention to invade your privacy but a deeper scan than normal was required to gain all the facts and lead us to the evidence needed to exonerate you."

Tom stared open mouthed. [That was almost a year ago!] He could not believe Tuvok knew for that length of time and said nothing. Worse, he did not discontinue their association. Tom still couldn't wrap his mind around that. Nor could he understand why a Vulcan would permit himself to be friends with a human empath. It did not make any sense. [Wouldn't he prefer not to be around someone who knew he had emotions???] Still he said nothing.

Tuvok took this time to lay out his suggestion for assistance. He would initiate a less intensive mind meld and literally assist in helping to reconstruct his mental barriers. After that he recommended that Tom engage in several hours of meditation to 'even things out'. Then he waited for Tom to agree or disagree. The only response Tuvok got was the continued stare. Finally, he had a mental image of the human idiom, dear caught in the headlights. It was...amusing.

"Tom?"

"Thanks for the offer but I don't think you want to do that."

"Why?"

"Remember Suder? He was Betazoid—an empath."

"This situation is dissimilar. In addition to being empathic, Ensign Suder was schizophrenic and severely unstable. That resulted in the neurochemical imbalance in my mesiofrontal cortex. You are not."

"Still, its not a good idea."

Tuvok was an extremely patient man but time was not on Tom Paris' side. He asked again,

"Why?"

Tom did not want to admit it. To himself or his friend. Or future former friend as Tom mentally rephrased it. 

"I wasn't as prepared for today as I needed to be. I...can feel...more stuff is coming through from others on board. I can't shut them out. It might bleed onto you. I'm not sure I can control it."

Then he closed his eyes as an even greater sense of mortification set in. He just admitted to a Vulcan that not only could he no longer control his own emotions, he was probably going to start broadcasting those of others. It was all starting to take its tool on him and he couldn't suppress the tremors in his hand when he raised it to brush the hair out of his face. When he caught sight of it he immediately dropped his hand and looked up at Tuvok to see if he noticed. Big mistake. He did. [Great! This day is just going to hell at warp 9!]

Tuvok saw and he knew the seriousness of the situation. There wasn't much time and he would not waste anymore on pointless debate. He reminded himself that Tom was not in the best state of mind to embrace logic as he was most probably picking up every emotion within two or three decks from their current location. He said nothing at first then gave him a pointed look and turned his gaze downward indicating the trembling hand.

"You require assistance and I am in a position to provide it. You must realize that time is of the essence. All you need do is accept what is offered in friendship."

Not waiting any longer he moved over toward the couch and sat down.

"The alternative is a visit to sick bay which will require a regiment of medication to suppress your empathic ability. You will also be required to wear a very visible cortical monitor for several days. I do not believe you wish the Doctor to intervene when this can be accomplished quickly and quietly between friends. Do I have your consent?"

For the second time in less than 24 hours, Tom Paris sat back on his couch after being defeated by one of his friends. All he could do was nod hoping that Tuvok managed to survive this.

While all Vulcans can be the recipient of a mind meld, only a small number are able to initiate one. A general misconception exists among other races that all Vulcans possess this ability. It is a rare gift though there was a time in Vulcan history, during the 22nd century when it was outlawed and melders were considered a threat to the very fabric of Vulcan society. All Vulcans are touch telepaths, which is why they do not permit physical contact with others outside of their family or very close friends, especially by members of other species. They are also able to conduct mind probes, or a mind touch as it is often referred to. This does not require physical contact nor does it facilitate the exchange of emotions. That is one reason that type of telepathy has always been accepted in Vulcan society. It is merely a general form of communication. 

Tuvok's psychic abilities are even more rare than most beyond his capability to initiate mind melds. He is one of an even smaller number of Vulcans who do not require touch or a mind meld to initiate or participate in telepathic communication. An extensive amount of intensive training is given to those who possess such gifts. With most, their telepathic ability is much stronger than other Vulcans though their telepathic range is usually limited to short distances. This was one reason he was strongly encouraged to train at the Temple of Amonak longer than others and his success was why he was selected as a candidate for the Kolinahr. His decision to abandon the training in leu of Starfleet led to a schism between he and his father and disappointed all but one of his teachers. 

A true mind meld allows both parties to share the same consciousness. The recipient must open their mind so that the two move together as one. Both persons share thoughts, memories and emotions. 

Tuvok placed his hand on Tom's right temple and began.

"My mind to your mind. Your thoughts to my thoughts. Our minds are merging. Our thoughts are becoming as one."

It might have been accomplished quietly as no one else was present but there was nothing quick about it. There was additional time wasted during the mind meld because Tom's natural instinct was to resist Tuvok once the connection was established. Tuvok was absolutely amazed at the out of body 3D flash of emotions he was witnessing. He immediately recognized a difference between the last time they participated in a mind meld. Then, Tuvok was viewing the memories stored in the neural implant the Banean injected Tom with. It was a deep scan that caused him to access all of the information needed to free him from the charges but it also allowed him to learn that Tom is empathic. But this was completely different. It was also unlike his experience with Suder. Tuvok was safe from the emotions Tom was experiencing from other members of the crew. He was, however, treated to a front row seat and back-draft of Tom's emotions. Tuvok was amazed at the extent Tom actually suppressed. He did not think it possible for a human but he had proof that it was. Because of this Tuvok realized that significant changes in Tom's meditation practices would have to be made. Tom would have to start learning some of the more advanced Vulcan techniques designed to expel the emotions after they were suppressed. It was apparent that Tom was merely piling them on top of each other and moving on. Tuvok suspected this was adding to the psychic strain on his mental shields.

When Tom wasn't fighting Tuvok he was trying to rush him so that the connection could be broken before any damage was done to him. While Tuvok appreciated the sentiment, he had to remind Tom that hastily erected mental shields were defeated the purpose because more time and effort in the future would be wasted correcting what should have been right in the first place. Tom was not amused. 

And then he cracked. Had it not been for Tuvok in his mind or him in Tuvok's mind, he wasn't quite sure, he would have been gone. The equivalent of a complete psychotic break would have been the result. While Tuvok did not relish the extent of damage his friend incurred he could not help admitting that the timing was more than perfect. Tom no longer had the ability to resist and was forced to take refuge in his mind. Tuvok called on all of his experience and training to guide Tom to a secure place and allow him a true respite from the storm of emotions cascading over him. The additional benefit, from Tuvok's Vulcan efficient perspective, was that he could work the way he wanted with no interruption from Tom. 

All things considered it was not too bad. After two hours, enough work was done so that Tom could actively participate. When it was all said and done, Tom got the distinct impression he'd just undergone some Vulcan shield enhancement because he felt a lot stronger. Tuvok did not think it necessary to explain that wasn't technically the case. Because of Tom's fragile condition when they began, Tuvok was a master craftsman and Tom was—playing with building blocks. It would not serve a purpose other than to remind Tom of the extent of his situation when they began. That was the point. Tom was more than capable of maintaining and fortifying his shields but the situation on Voyager was just too strange for any empath. It was like requiring someone stare at the sun. The constant pounding he was taking was a bit much at times and Tom admitted he was not as prepared as he needed to be. 

Once their minds were disengaged, Tuvok did not allow Tom any time to be embarrassed at his need for assistance or to dwell on the fact that his secret was out. He lit Tom's meditation lamp and guided him into the first stage of Rhi-Sia. He stayed for another hour to monitor Tom's meditation and then left. Tuvok knew it might raise some suspicion should the captain attempt to contact Tom, but it could not be helped. He activated a privacy seal on both Tom's quarters and his com badge so there would be no interruptions during this delicate time. Then checked in with the others so that they did not disturb him for the rest of the evening. 

Tuvok wanted to make sure that Harry was in better spirits. He was very curious about Harry Kim's emotional disposition. Never had he encountered a human with such a naturally mild disposition. The only emotion Harry Kim ever expressed—and now Tuvok had to amend that to experienced— in the extreme was joy or happiness. It was definitely an oddity in human behavior. As a Vulcan, however, Tuvok found that refreshing. The dark times before Surak brought Vulcans enlightenment through logic and his philosophy of suppressing or purging emotions, Vulcans were an extremely violent race. At any given time up to 90% of the planet was engaged in clan warfare of one kind or another. Their emotions are much stronger and much more intense than humans or other humanoid species. That is why they have abandoned them. 

Security did not contact him so he was assured that Seven nor B'Elanna misbehaved. Then he planned to return to his quarters and undergo some extensive mediation of his own. He had no idea that something else was wrong.

Captain Janeway left the conference room after the staff meeting and went directly to her Ready room to review Tom's proposal. No doubt about it, the idea was good. They did need something like that. There were some things she was not familiar with including the semi-organic biotechnology. It was still a Federation theory. She had to admit, she was hooked. Then she thought about some of the things that occurred in the meeting. It was obvious that there was a great deal of polarization on the senior staff when it came to Tom. She was not sure what that was all about but it was clear that none of them were happy about the situation. That caused her to consider Chakotay. As far as she knew, the situation was resolved between them after the crews merged. She did detect some resentment after the Kazon mission and realized that she had not considered Tom's feelings in the situation as carefully as she might have. However, it was a command decision and a sound one. She would stick by it. Moreover, that was over two years ago. Chakotay could not possibly still be harboring any resentment from that? She thought it prudent to find out. Granted, she did not believe that Tom was capable of something like this but the way that Seven addressed Chakotay made it perfectly clear that she had a serious problem with Chakotay's attitude toward Tom. Something had to be done.

"Janeway to Chakotay."

"Chakotay."

"When you have a few minutes can you stop by my Ready room?"

"Sure, I'm on my way if that's ok."

"Fine. Janeway out."

He was sure he knew what she wanted to talk to him about. He just wasn't up for the conversation.

"Enter."

Chakotay noticed immediately that she was sitting on the couch and already had the tea out. That meant she wanted to 'chat' and they'd probably be there for some time. She wasn't sure how to start the conversation but since she didn't feel like dancing she figured she'd just hit the ground running.

"What happened in the staff meeting?"

[Ok, that's one way of getting to it.]

"What do you mean?"

"Let's not play games, Chakotay. I admit that I was just as surprised as you were by the presentation and the whole idea. Not to mention finding out that Tom came up with the whole thing."

He relaxed a bit at her words.

"It is unbelievable."

"Not according to five members of the senior staff. Not one of them looked like either of us were staying on their Christmas card list for long. Seven's words were pretty powerful."

"What are you saying, Katherine?"

"As shocked as I was, you were openly hostile and accusatory enough for her to inform you that you were close to crossing some very dangerous lines. Dishonorable, illogical, fraudulent. She managed to put all the buzz words in one statement."

Chakotay really didn't know what to say. He didn't know what the problem was and he wasn't sure why he reacted like that but Tom Paris always got him riled up.

"I guess I just lost my cool. I don't know. It was something out of the blue, completely unexpected."

"I get the sense from the others that they expected your reaction. It was apparent that Harry, Seven, Tuvok, and even B'Elanna expected your reaction or something close to it. Looking back on it, the way they each jumped in they expected something like that from both of us. If you notice, the only time one of them spoke was to assure us that it was Tom's work. That's it. Or in Seven's case, to threaten us."

That made him sit quietly for a few long moments thinking about what she said. Then something didn't add up.

"Tuvok? He didn't open his mouth."

"Didn't have to. I've known the man a long time. He wasn't happy about either of our conduct toward a fellow officer and his look spoke volumes. I'm not sure what the look he sent Tom was about but it was obviously in support."

"Well, you're better at reading him than I am."

Just a hint of snide in that remark pulled her up short. Yeah, she's missed a lot.

"Chakotay, are you still harboring feelings of resentment toward Tom or Tuvok for their role in flushing out the Kazon spy?"

She put it out there and Chakotay had to deal with it. What did she want him to say? He was played for a fool twice by the same two people. Same three if he included Seska. It was an embarrassment. And now he had to put up with them. Tuvok, ok, he could understand that Vulcan logic probably made everything alright for him. And he understood that Tuvok's lack of emotions meant he had no clue how his actions would affect Chakotay. But, Paris was a different story. He knew. There was so much there from before. And it wasn't just about flushing out the Kazon spy, Paris made him look like a fool in front of the entire crew and everybody knew it. To top it off, she gives him a field promotion.

Chakotay was too quiet for too long. Janeway had her answer and realized she should have had it a long time ago. It would not do for the staff to be separated by personal issues when they affect ship's business. She realized that whatever negative feelings her First Officer held for her pilot were the real reason he attacked him during the meeting. Stepping back, she was forced to admit it was an attack on his character, credibility and his general ability. Had Neelix submitted the same report there would have been skepticism but it would not have been a negatively charged atmosphere. This was not something she wanted to deal with. But, she was the captain and she was going to deal with it.

"Chakotay?"

"What do you want me to say? He irritates me. He's a goof off and he isn't serious about anything except flying this ship. Which I admit he does well. Other than that, what's the point. And, I'm still trying to figure out what his angle is."

"Angle?"

"Yeah, what does he get out of this new shuttle? Except getting to fly it."

"Chakotay, did you hear what you just said? A member of the senior staff spent—we have no idea how long—designing something more advanced than Starfleet Corp of Engineers has ever attempted and your only response is what does he get out of it?"

Then she sat back on the couch and stared at him for a few moments.

"He's a goof off who isn't serious about anything? Cite me some examples, please. I'm not saying you're wrong on that I'm saying give me something to back that up. Cause I'm looking at the duty roster and from what I can see something isn't adding up."

That causes him to perk up in his seat just a bit.

"What do you mean?"

"In addition to his regular bridge shifts, he works 2 shifts a week with the Doctor and volunteered to be on call two days a week other than during Alpha shift. I checked the holo deck logs. Only program he's run in the last 6 months is this Delta Flyer. That's the name of the shuttle. Sure, he could be at Sandrines or a guest in someone else's program but I bet he's not. And, I know that you don't like Tuvok. I won't even address that, but we are both aware that the two of them spend time together. Even in your dislike for Tuvok I doubt you could accuse him of engaging in activity one could call goofing off. 

My understanding from Neelix is that Tom is learning Vulcan. I've known Tuvok a long time. I tried. I tried even his Vulcan patience. I can't speak Vulcan. And Neelix says that Tom babysits Naomi Wildman at least one night a week for the past year so Sam can get a break. Free. Nothing exchanged. Just doing it because. What's going on?"

Chakotay doesn't really know what to say to any of that. Fine. He's not a goof off. And maybe he has some redeeming talent but that doesn't erase the past. As if picking up on his thoughts,

"Unless those aren't your real reasons for disliking him. Yes, I'm officially ready to classify it as dislike. And I really shouldn't even get involved in that except that you involved me in it when you took something personal and threw it in the middle of ship's business. Tom didn't say a word and now that I'm forced to sit back and think over things in the last several months, Tom never says a word. He's quiet all the time. Neelix felt compelled to come in here and share some things about his observations of Tom over the past 1 ½ years because he thought—and I quote 'you and the Commander might not be aware of.' Even he sees that there is some kind of prejudice on one or both of our parts. I'm going to take a long hard look in the mirror but I already say that you are out of line.

All these things I listed earlier our Moral Officer thought WE needed to know before we made a decision on the shuttle. That means at least all of the senior staff are of the opinion that WE have some kind of bias against him as an individual that might cloud our professional judgment. What do you think?"

Chakotay's still not saying anything. He didn't think it was this bad. He also figured it could be an act.

"We all see what a good actor he can be when he wants. How are we supposed to know all these things are for real?"

"What does any of it have to do with the fact that we need the shuttle and he came up with the idea? Are you going to go against it just because its HIS idea?"

"You believe its his work?"

She just stared at him.

"Between you and me Chakotay don't ever say that to anyone else. I'll keep quiet but if it gets back to B'Elanna or Seven I am not going to step in nor will I call security. They both put you on notice today. Don't think I didn't see Seven practically drag B'Elanna out of the conference room when she was heading toward you. You didn't just question her honor, you directly challenged her and we both know it. I don't understand much about what's going on with B'Elanna or the changes in her but I KNOW not to go there."

"Katherine, I don't know what to say. I admit that I crossed the line during the meeting. I didn't see it as that and really hadn't thought about it. Things just happened so fast. Seven made me think and I wasn't trying to insult her or B'Elanna it was just a surprise."

He stopped but she knew he had more so she didn't interrupt. After taking a deep breath and exhaling,

"I suppose I have some unresolved issues with Tom. Or at least what he represents. Tuvok as well but he has a better excuse. When we beamed aboard and I saw Tom at the helm—well you were there you know what happened. Then Tuvok waltzes over to tactical and I see another member of my crew is actually a member of yours. But that Kazon thing was too much. I'm supposed to be your First Officer but you didn't trust—at the very least—my acting ability."

She saw the damage in living color but could not understand something.

"Chakotay, that was three years ago. Are you...do you have unresolved issues with me as well?"

His head whipped around and he only stared at her like she was crazy.

"Of course not. Why would you think that?"

"Because I'm the one who went to Tom and convinced him to come on the mission. He didn't want to and he never told me anything about the Maquis or you. I'm the one who ordered Tom to do everything he did to flush out the spy and get on Seska's good side. He did not want to do that. I had to—and I am not proud of it—use every piece of emotional blackmail I could think of to get him to agree. I mean I pulled out stuff from when he was 6 years old. He begged me, literally begged me, to tell you about it. I wouldn't and I ordered him not to either. Looking back on that I should have been suspicious of why he was so adamant that I specifically tell you. Not Harry or anyone else he had to piss off, just you. Any ideas? Or is our ace pilot clairvoyant? Did he see this coming or what?"

After speaking with Tuvok, Harry went back to his quarters to cool off. He really didn't think it was possible for him to get so worked up. Harry Kim wasn't so naive that he wasn't aware of the fact that worked up for him was merely annoyed for everyone else. Didn't matter. He whipped out his clarinet and 10 minutes later he was feeling right as rain. He still didn't know what they could do to fix the situation or help convince the captain that Tom's idea was a good one. He knew Tom's master plan and approved for many reasons. He also knew that Tom didn't have a chance in hell of putting it in motion if he couldn't get over this hump. Harry could see how excited Tom was even if he didn't admit it. He could also see that for a few minutes early on in the meeting, his friend seemed to think he might have a shot. Chakotay dashed all those hopes as soon as he opened his mouth and Harry saw Tom shut down.

Two hours later B'Elanna and Seven stopped by. He could tell that B'Elanna put Seven through the paces. Secretly, he wished B'Elanna had taken a swing at Chakotay. Then he got over that because gratuitous violence really wasn't in Harry's nature. 

"Hey Starfleet. You must have been really ticked. The clarinet and...what's that a banjo?"

Seven smirked.

"It is not a banjo. For someone who spent a considerable amount of time among humans you lack basic knowledge of their musical instruments."

"Duh. So what is it?"

Harry answered after he stopped laughing.

"It's a Vulcan Lute. Also known as a lyrette or a harp."

B'Elanna picked it up and turned it over in her hands a few times.

"Ok. But its pretty small for a harp. Can you play this thing?"

"Yeah, I can play it. I found it in the data base after the travesty that was my last ass kicking at Kaltoh."

Then he turned to Seven with narrowed eyes and shook his finger.

"Don't think I didn't find out that Pleenok is a kid's game. Training tool for primary Vulcan logic my foot. Its for kids 5 and under!"

B'Elanna didn't know that and laughed in his face.

"Well, Vulcan's live a lot longer than humans and they age differently so factor in the differential and you're about in the right range."

"You're not helping. Nor are you funny."

Seven decided to defuse the situation.

"Were you successful at Pleenok? Regardless of the age it was intended, I imagine that the skills it was intended to teach are more important."

"Actually, yeah I've been playing it for a few months. Tuvok already put the Vulcan spin on it with lots of logical advice so you can skip it."

"Good. So how'd you come by the lute or whatever its called? And are you better at it than Kaltoh?"

"Shut up B'Elanna. But to answer your question, I'm very good at it. Not a master but I studied the history etc. Then I took some holographic lessons. I've been practicing for a few months. Music comes naturally for me."

"So, do we get to hear you or what?"

"Yes, I would enjoy listening as well. Your choice of relaxation techniques is less...strenuous than B'Elanna's."

B'Elanna rolled her eyes at that then plopped down on the couch and gave Harry a wave of the hand that said, hop to it. He did.


	5. Starfleet Command

The following day Captain Janeway, stopped Tom at the end of Alpha shift as he was leaving the bridge.

"Mr. Paris, if you have a few minutes I'd like to meet with you."

He really didn't think it was a question or an option so he simply nodded.

"Sure, captain, I don't have to be in sick bay until Gamma shift so I've got some free time now."

She nodded and headed toward her ready room. But not before tossing a mild 'I told you so' look in Chakotay's direction. Tom missed that because he instinctively turned to look at Tuvok before following the captain.

Once they were seated on the couch,

"Tom, I am very impressed by your proposal. I couldn't put it down last night and definitely think we need to start working on it as soon as possible."

Tom didn't say anything. He was preparing himself for the brush off so he processed her words in a delayed sort of way. He had no idea what she was thinking or what she really meant because he kept his shields up and tight the entire shift. After his complete breakdown yesterday he wanted to make sure he never picked up anything from her or Chakotay again. He'd have to take them both at face value from now on. The captain noticed he hadn't said anything initially. She also noticed that he was silent from the moment he agreed to meet with her. She really didn't know what that was about but after meeting with Chakotay yesterday she sat for some time mentally going over their interactions over the past year. She also thought about the things Neelix brought to her attention. Moral Officer was not in the Starfleet handbook but it really should have been. Nothing got by that man. Now she was aware that there was a definite shift in Tom's personality, routine and behavior that hadn't gone unnoticed by the rest of the crew. 

According to Neelix, Tom is still polite and in good spirits but his social time is limited to four members of the crew and Naomi Wildman. That was a surprise. Tom was always the social butterfly. Or so she thought until Neelix laid it out for her. Then things didn't make much sense. But he seemed to notice slight changes in him after Tom and Tuvok started working together on the holo programs. However, Neelix said that the biggest change occurred after they left the Banean system. It seems that B'Elanna was the most vocal in her defense of him to the rest of the crew who openly speculated on the possibility that he was guilty. This caused her to consider her own conduct and attitude at the time. The crew takes their lead from their commanding officers. She did not voice her suspicions to anyone but Tuvok but it was pretty obvious that she wasn't defending him to them either. If the captain and first officer thought he did it, what could she expect from the crew.

"Tom?"

"Yes, captain."

"You're not saying anything."

"I was waiting for you to lay out the plan."

He did not seem upset in the least. Just the same as during the meeting. She decided that it was best not to dredge that up or call either of their misgivings to his attention if he hadn't noticed them. She did not want to put him on the spot.

"Well, the plan is pretty much up to you since this is your creation. Select your team and start putting together a work schedule. Obviously, we'll make reassignments to cover your bridge shifts so you can devote your time to building it. Unless we run into some problems that will require your expertise on the bridge, consider yourself on full time Delta Flyer duty. That includes sick bay. I hadn't realized you were working there as much as you have been. The Doctor can get along without you for awhile."

Then she smiled at him warmly and he returned it. But he was still guarded on the inside. He wasn't going to let himself get sucked in again.

"Alright captain. I'll speak with B'Elanna to see what her schedule is like. And I'll forward you all the information you need. Progress reports will be submitted weekly and you can expect daily updates. I was thinking shuttle bay 3 would be the best location for construction. I'll need a certain amount of holo deck time reserved so that the others can familiarize themselves with the project and I still want to test the changes in the warp coil and cylinder reaction that the Flyer will have. Once I have all that worked out, I'll set the schedule and send you the report so that you can monitor our work."

She tried her darnist not to react to his level or preparedness and simply nodded.

"Sounds good to me. Pull anyone you need and as I said, we'll work something out with their schedules. Really, this is amazing work Tom and I am beyond impressed. I am so proud of you."

Rising from his seat,

"Thank you."

With that, he walked out and headed toward engineering to speak with B'Elanna. He figured that she, Seven and Harry would make up the team and they'd just have to work hard to get it done in time. He thought wrong. Tom still had to speak with Tuvok and wasn't particularly looking forward to it but figured he'd do that before heading down to Engineering. After confirming his location, Tom headed to Tuvok's quarters. On the way he contacted B'Elanna and said that he'd meet with her later to discuss putting together a work schedule because the captain approved the project. That's all he said over the com link and she understood completely.

He wasn't sure where to begin so he really didn't say anything and just sort of stood there looking stupid. Tuvok expected this reaction. He did not know how his meeting with the captain went but he was certain Tom would stop by to discuss the previous day's events. Still unfamiliar with human emotions and responses, Tuvok learned to anticipate their actions over the years. 

"Would you like something to drink?"

"Huh?"

"I offered you a beverage."

"Oh, sorry. Thanks. Um, spiced tea I guess."

Tom had taken to consuming Vulcan food and beverage around Tuvok just to make sure he didn't select anything that would be offensive to him. Some things he liked better than others as they reminded him of many human dishes. Vulcan food was generally bland. Normally, he's certain he'd notice it but considering the outrageous amount of spices and seasonings Neelix loads the food in the mess with, he welcomes it. For awhile, he really didn't think his taste buds would survive. Only the Bolian members of the crew enjoyed Neelix's cooking and eagerly awaited new 'creations'. They were his best customers. 

Tuvok silently prepared the tea and set the tray on the coffee table then sat and waited. He knew Tom was uncomfortable but he also sensed that he should remain silent and allow him to direct the conversation. Tom must have picked up on this because he took a seat and began.

"Thank you. Before you say no thanks is necessary and you merely did the logical thing, I still appreciate it. If you hadn't helped...well we both know I wouldn't be sitting here thanking you."

"You are welcome."

Tom took a deep breath then got to the thing he really wanted to know but wasn't sure he wanted to ask. 

"How come you didn't say anything before."

"As I said, I inadvertently acquired that knowledge. Since you did not tell me I concluded that you did not wish for me to know."

Tom sees the logic in that—sort of. But it still doesn't make sense. The point was to conceal it, not have him pretend he didn't know. Tuvok was fairly certain he was following Tom's thought process but deemed it prudent not to comment. With that answer, Tom decided he should get to the heart of things.

"Then why'd you continue to be my friend? Why still hang out with me?"

This was not something Tuvok considered. He had no clue what Tom was talking about.

"I do not understand. What does knowing have to do with our friendship?"

"I'm an empath. You can say it. And, yeah, I don't understand why a Vulcan would want to spend time with an empath."

Now Tuvok gets it. He finds Tom's reasoning amusing but thinks it wise not to mention that.

"Vulcans experience emotion. We are sentient organic beings like others. We do not express them and we do not allow them to dictate our actions. There are some Vulcan's who have mastered Kolinahr, the state where they completely purge all emotion. They are rare."

"But most people don't know that."

"Yes, but you do. The perception of Vulcan existence and the truth are two different matters. It would be illogical for me to pretend I do not experience emotions when I do. I do not, however,...advertise that fact."

Tom smiled. That was Tuvok's version of a joke and he got it.

"So you don't mind?"

"You are who you are. Your gift is yours. It is a part of you and no more or less offensive to my...Vulcan sensibilities than the color of your eyes."

Then he stopped because he was about to turn the conversation in a different direction and was not sure Tom was ready for it. It was necessary based on the events of yesterday.

"First, my silence is assured. It is not my place or my intention to make public that which you desire to keep private. We should discuss some additional meditation exercises that may be helpful given your...unique situation."

That was news to Tom and he didn't try to hide it. Tuvok noticed that Tom had a habit of tilting his head slight to the left when he was surprised or required more information. He said nothing about this mannerism or that it appeared to be something he'd unconsciously developed over the last 6 months.

"There were significant differences between the mind meld we shared yesterday and the first. While I learned that you are empathic the first time; I was concentrating on gathering information from the memories stored in the Banean implant. Yesterday we experienced a complete unification of thought, memories and emotions while working to rebuild your mental shields and strengthen your defenses."

Yeah, Tom thought a lot about that late that night. He pretty much crawled inside Tuvok's mind and camped out there for a couple of hours in order to retain his sanity. He now realizes that he was as wide open as it gets. And, he's pretty sure that he doesn't have many, if any, secrets from Tuvok anymore. Course he learned a heck of a lot about Tuvok in the process.

"You're a pretty unique and powerful telepath as far as Vulcans go. That must have really made you stand out."

"You are familiar with the various forms of Vulcan telepathy?"

Sheepishly,

"Uh, yeah. After the first time I looked it up. Vulcans keep a lot secret. Or, deem a significant amount of information irrelevant to off worlders."

"You are learning to speak Vulcan."

"In Vulcan and Federation Standard." Then he laughed.

"Then you are familiar with our history. There have been many grey areas in the past."

"Well, the path to enlightenment gets rocky some times. Seriously, I hadn't thought about it until then. I think its generally accepted that all Vulcans can initiate mind melds. The controversy around that is interesting but not important. Personally, I'm glad you can or I wouldn't be here. But I meant your other telepathic abilities. That's pretty cool."

"It seems that you were more aware than I initially concluded."

"No. I was pretty much as gone as you suspected. Completely incapable of defending myself—or controlling the situation. But in your mind, it was a different story. I have no idea what was happening in my head or what you saw for the first couple of hours. I accept that and all that comes with it."

"A productive and satisfactory attitude."

"So, what new meditation exercises do you suggest and why?"

Tuvok took a few moments to phrase his thoughts in his head before speaking but Tom cut him off.

"I think we're past that now and you can just say anything you want to me. I'll deal with it."

"I did not think that it was possible for a human to suppress the depth and extent of emotions that you do. That is commendable. It is also detrimental to your continued existence because of the way you are doing it. Merely stacking emotions on top of one another without releasing them completely is adding to the psychic strain you are no doubt experiencing. It helps that you are no longer...wearing the mask as you did in the past."

Tom saw the logic and the wisdom in those words so he accepted them without offense. There really wasn't any need to hide with Tuvok anymore so he didn't bother playing dumb.

"Ok, lay it out for me."

That did surprise Tuvok. He did not expect Tom to react so logically to the situation. Then again, Tom tried his hand at thinking and acting logically on occasion so Tuvok decided he was not surprised. He took time explaining all that he concluded during their session and his reasoning for the various techniques. Tom didn't object since he really didn't have anything better. That prompted Tuvok to finally ask about his training.

"Yeah, that was informal. As you guessed, it's a state secret so to speak. The only person I actually told was B'Elanna the night before the meeting. She's a little too perceptive some times. She stopped by to tell me that neither she or Seven would submit the proposal and did some kind of Klingon voodoo thing on me because she figured out a heck of a lot of stuff just by looking at me. I didn't give her any details and we didn't really discuss it but she understood why I really didn't want to do it.

As for my training. Funny but that happened by accident. I suppressed a lot of stuff. Always have. You know about Caldik Prime, who doesn't. Anyway, I never made a statement because I never wanted to speak, think about or relive it. Empaths shouldn't be around the dying. Its major sensory overload and can kill you if it doesn't drive you crazy. Anyway, I started dating a Betazoid. I have no idea how I thought I'd keep my secret from her. When two empaths...."

Then Tom stopped because he wasn't sure if he was going to offend Tuvok with this. Vorik's pon far was still fresh in his mind after having treated him in sick bay. It was obvious Vulcan's didn't talk about sex but he wasn't sure if that was for every species or just themselves. After a mental 'whatever' he continued.

"are intimate there are no barriers. Its like standing between two mirrors. I didn't know this ahead of time or I never would have let things get that far. Everything surfaced and there wasn't anyplace to put it so it was like a waking nightmare playing over and over in my head. No one knew what was happening. No one knew anything. The only way for me to purge the emotion was to confess. Or so I thought. I don't regret telling the truth. Well, I hate how my life turned out but it would've come out sooner or later. After I was done with the inquest she showed up. Didn't wait for me to pretend I didn't know what she was talking about. Said I needed to be trained and that she would teach me everything she knew. She never said a word. Kept my secret til the day she died."

Tuvok said nothing during the story. It answered many of his questions but still left a major one unanswered. 

"How did you survive prior to that?"

"Grit and determination. You've probably seen more of me than anyone else. More than even she did so I won't pretend with you anymore. You know things weren't exactly kosher in my house growing up. As a kid I didn't know it wasn't normal to feel the emotions of others so I never said anything. Kids are pretty good at defending themselves when they have to. Pure self preservation instinct caused me to create enough mental shielding to survive. As I got older I realized what I was and taught myself as much as I could. There was no way I was going to say anything. Good thing I didn't or I'd be some diplomatic attache on some boring outpost instead of trapped in the Delta quadrant on a ship full of people who, well, you know."

Impressed. Tuvok found nothing about Tom's situation amusing. But he was impressed that he'd managed to make it through his entire childhood with only the skills he taught himself. Tuvok thought he definitely had potential to learn a great deal. Human empaths were rare. Human telepaths were more common though they weren't the norm either. He knew Tom's abilities were very strong after the first mind meld but assumed that he found a teacher secretly some time during his adolescence. Yes, Tuvok learned a great deal about Tom Paris yesterday but now he realizes he didn't even scratch the surface. The confession that his childhood was unpleasant was news to him. He knew that his father disavowed him after the Maquis arrest but did not know there was something serious during his formative years. He said nothing.

"I am impressed by the level of control and skill you managed to teach yourself. It is a credit to your ability and your strength."

That was the highest praise possible from a Vulcan and Tom knew it. 

"Thanks."

Tom knew that Tuvok was curious about his meeting with the captain but wouldn't ask. He was planning on telling him anyway so it wasn't a big deal. They still had much to discuss about his meditation regiment so Tuvok suggested that they talk over dinner.

"I'm never one to pass up free food. Whatever you're having is fine with me."

Tuvok merely raised an eyebrow in response as he moved toward the replicator. Tom correctly interpreted that to mean, 'be careful what you ask for' and laughed. 

Harry and Seven were hold up in his quarters again and B'Elanna didn't even bother asking about that. For the past two months those two were up to something. Harry was more obsessive than usual about his study of all things Borg. Initially, B'Elanna was happy because she thought he'd be of immediate and useful assistance in engineering or on the occasion Seven needed a tune up. Seven wasn't overly pleased with that phrase. Harry was helpful but whatever he was working on didn't have anything to do with upgrades she wanted to make so she ignored him. It wasn't until late one evening when he, Seven and B'Elanna met at Tom's to discuss the work schedule that she got her answer. Pleased, she agreed to help.

"Gee, is everyone working on upgrading something around here except me?"

"I believe you spent a considerable amount of time last month modifying the deflector array. I am almost certain that you did considering Astrometrics was deemed a nonessential system and shut down while you conducted numerous tests."

"And I believe that Astrometrics benefits from those modifications just as much as the rest of us. The last time someone took shots at us, we were able to defend ourselves quite nicely. Notice no one in your department is dead."

"Whenever you two are finished, can we get back to the reason you guys are camped out in my living room?"

"Of course."

"So, I can count on the three of you right? Maybe you can ask Vorik to help out."

When the three of them looked at each other without answering he knew they were up to something. When they kept staring at B'Elanna he knew they decided she was going to have to be the hammer on it. Whatever, he had a relaxing evening with Tuvok and he one a game of chess. He could take it.

"What now?"

"Nothing like that Tom. Look, this is your project and of course we'll help out. No way I'm not gonna have a hand in building something like this. But, its still your project."

"And?" He has no clue what B'Elanna is talking about. Harry steps in.

"We think everyone should know it."

As if that answered his question.

"First, who cares who knows it? Second, what's this got to do with whatever you guys decided I don't need to know because no one wants to tell me?"

"Fine. We feel you should select the team from engineering and whichever other departments are necessary and that it shouldn't be just us. You need to be the one who is clearly running the show."

"And if it flops, I'll be the one taking the heat?"

"Precisely."

"Seven, that wasn't part of the plan. Nor is it an incentive to convince him to go along with it."

"Mr. Kim, whispering is ineffectual as Tom is sitting next to me. If I can hear you, logic dictates he can as well."

"Borg enhanced hearing, you never know. Seriously, help or go home. And don't raise that eyebrow at me!"

"Tom, B'Elanna and Harry are correct. I, too, have every intention of participating on this project to the fullest extent possible. However, you cannot deny the long term benefit of establishing yourself now. It will pave the way for future projects."

Tom nodded then turned a suspicious gaze on Harry the stool pigeon wondering if he spilled the beans on that as well.

"No, I didn't say anything. Geez, cut me a little slack."

"Fine. Do you guys have suggestions as to who I should select? Most of them would be coming from your department, B'Elanna. You willing to let them go? The semi-organic shielding is gonna take some time to perfect, Sam Wildman's expertise in xenobiology will be crucial so I was going to speak to her department head too."

"Yeah, I thought about that after you sent the all clear. I'll work something out. Besides, if I'm short staffed there are a few people in....oh I don't know Astrometrics I can snag and bring over to the light side."

"Pilfering staff would be unwise. But, should you wish to set a precedent, I will adapt."

Tom and Harry exchanged looks and rolled their eyes at this exchange. 

"Productive people. Let's stay productive."

And that was pretty much all that was needed to set everyone to task. It took less than two hours to work up the schedule and iron things out because Tom thought about this and made some preparations when he thought B'Elanna would agree to present things. It only made sense to raid her staff. After they were done B'Elanna turned to Harry.

"Ok, secret agent number 5, what have you been up to?"

"Ever since we made contact with the Romulan listening post in the Beta quadrant I've been thinking of ways to make direct contact. Haven't actually worked that out because we're not stationary and the ship doesn't have the power to do that. Especially in some of the more dense areas we travel through. But, thanks to Borg technology, obsession and a touch of desperation on my part I've figured out a way to boost our communications signal. Oh, and the modifications you made on the deflector array are coming in handy. It'll also mean taking a walk in negative G in order to implement some of my other changes but the upgrades to internal systems and sensors come first."

Tom and B'Elanna just stared. Then they smiled.

"Way to go Harry! Why didn't you say something before?"

"Yeah, it makes your obsession with unlocking the mystery that is Borg algorithms seem normal. I thought we were gonna have to hire a deprogramer or something."

"Thanks for your support!"

To say the engineering team was surprised was an understatement. They would've expected to be pulled out of shift to work on something like this but 1) they never considered something like this and 2) they did not expect to be reporting to Tom Paris and not B'Elanna or Seven. No one said a word when they caught the chief's death glare of silence as Tom stepped up and started outlining the project in front of them. They couldn't believe it. Then they read their padds and couldn't believe they were going to try something like this. The engineer in all of them came flying out of the closet and the questions were hot on their heels. After glancing through the initial information, they didn't care who came up with it. They just wanted more information. It didn't take long for all of them to realize that there was a hell of a lot more to Tom Paris than any of them expected. B'Elanna, Seven and Harry were on the team but they weren't running things, Paris was. Amazing.

Captain Janeway couldn't stay away. She was just as eager to help as the rest of them and actually asked Tom if she could work a few shifts with the others. He hid his surprise and his fear. Not so well that she didn't pick up on that last one. She should have known he'd be suspicious that she was merely there to check up on him. B'Elanna and Seven worked with her enough over the past few years to know it was the engineer in her screaming for a chance to have a hand in it and nothing else. She amended her request saying that she didn't care which team he assigned her to and that it should be something nonessential since the captain had other duties. She also commented that Harry dragged her into his project so her time was being split three ways. That was enough to ease his mind and he readily agreed after that. This told her that she had quite a lot of repair work to do with Tom Paris and that she owed him a great deal. Both as captain and as his friend.

Harry's super powered communications system didn't take long to upgrade. Janeway took a few minutes to consider her crew and her ship. The later would confound Starfleet Corps of Engineers when they returned. Between B'Elanna, Seven and Harry there wasn't a portion of the ship that didn't have something Borg attached to it. Janeway still did not understand how B'Elanna's mind worked but she counted herself as one of the masses with that one. Her chief engineer did things that Starfleet absolutely said were not possible. That warp core no longer hummed, it sang. The manual said 79% was high efficiency. They never got to know B'Elanna because she already broke 91% and would not stop until she hit triple digits. She wouldn't even comment on the fact that there was no such thing as an Astrometrics lab in Starfleet. They never met Seven of Nine. She was pleased with their work and proud of her crew.

The reward came just a two weeks after Harry worked his magic. About an hour before the end of Alpha shift in a particularly boring area of space something happened. B'Elanna was working on the bridge that day and noticed Harry engaged in strange activity for about 15 minutes. Or strange for him at least. She caught Tuvok's eye but he could not tell what had Harry's attention any more than she could. They'd have to wait. They didn't have to wait long.

"Captain, incoming subspace transmission. It's a Starfleet signature."

Every head on the bridge turned in his direction.

"Come again?" Her heart was pounding. 

"There's another Federation ship out here in the Delta quadrant?"

She did not want anyone to suffer their plight but it would be good to see a familiar face.

"No Mam. This one is coded from Starfleet Command. Hold while I confirm identity signature."

He closed his eyes and shook his head before looking up but everyone noticed that he wasn't looking at the captain and he no longer looked happy.

"Harry? What is it? What's wrong?"

"Confirmed point of origin, Alpha quadrant. Recommend all stop. Time to intercept 42 seconds. Starfleet Command signature belongs to...Admiral Eugene Paris."

At those words Tom turned around and was suddenly very occupied in a navigation systems check. The captain didn't catch that because she was looking at Harry but Chakotay and B'Elanna did.

"We are being hailed."

She practically shouted,

"On screen."

"Captain Janeway! We've been trying to reach you all for some time now."

"Admiral, this is a surprise. We weren't sure if the Romulans would forward the message."

"I am pleased to say they did. Once we had even the slightest hope that Voyager survived the Badlands we got to work. The Pathfinder station was created for the sole purpose of initiating and maintaining connection with Voyager. We wanted to insure you knew we were thinking of you and that you all are not alone."

"You have no idea how happy we are to hear that."

"Any word on the Maquis ship?"

"Actually, yes. We are one big happy crew now."

"I see." He did not seem enthused by that answer but there wasn't anything they could do about it.

"Yes, if it weren't for the Trinity, Voyager would have been destroyed. Her captain, Commander Chakotay is our First Officer. If he hadn't sacrificed his ship we would all be dead. We are one Starfleet crew and have been for over four years."

She was sure to get her point across so that there would be no confusion should a worm hole miraculously open up in the next 2 minutes and deposit them somewhere around Risa or Mars. He got the point and took that time to inspect the crew. His eyes settled on B'Elanna as the most obvious standout. There was only one Klingon in Starfleet and he was not on board Voyager last time Admiral Paris checked. Janeway followed his eye. 

"Voyager's chief engineer. Lt. B'Elanna."

"I see." Then he moved on quickly.

"It will take some time, but we want to be able to establish a mail delivery system. Real time communications will be rare but we need to keep in contact while we work to find a way to get you all home. I taught you well Katie so I know you have four years worth of reports to file as well as your captain's log." Then he laughed.

"Yes you did. And, you'll get the pleasure of reading as much as you like if you send the coordinates."

Just then she noticed the look of horror and fright that crossed his face but he didn't say anything.

"Admiral? Is something wrong?"

"Captain, turn around. Slowly."

She did but when she didn't see anything she wasn't sure what his problem was so she turned back to the screen in obvious confusion.

"Admiral?"

A response came just as the bridge doors closed behind its most recent arrival,

"I believe he is referring to me, captain."

Realization set in.

"Oh, Admiral. This is Voyager's chief Astrometric's officer, Annika Hanson. Thanks to her, we've gotten this far. She's literally been the star pointing us in the right direction home."

Nonplused, he continued to stare at Seven. A few other heads popped into the background behind the Admiral and did the same. 

"I see." Then he shook it off. He was going to have a hell of a meeting with Starfleet Security later but since Voyager's bridge crew, at least, didn't seem to be assimilated drones he wouldn't say anything to her now.

"Well, if you transmit an updated crew manifest we'll be sure to contact all the families to let them know that their loved ones are safe and on their way home."

No one said anything but it was more than obvious that Admiral Paris hadn't bothered to glance in the direction of the helm once. Even when he made his more than thorough inspection of the bridge.

Captain Janeway made two modifications to the crew manifest before transmitting it. The first thing she did was change Seven's name to Annika Hanson, deleting all reference to Seven of Nine. Yeah, she and Seven would fight about that later but Katherine Janeway wasn't stupid. She knew trouble when it was staring her in the face. The second thing she did was check to make sure there were no traces of the name Torres ever being in the record so that they could not track her back to Starfleet Academy yet. She did not like the way Admiral Paris was looking at B'Elanna and didn't want them building a case against her this soon. Then she verified that the manifest matched exactly what B'Elanna listed on the change of name form. B'Elanna, Daughter of Miral of the House of Ko'Thor, place of residence Qo'noS. Let them fight about arresting a Daughter of the Empire later. 

"I'm transmitting the information now."

After a few seconds,

"We've got it. Clarinet? What's this?"

"Yes, I promised Harry Kim's mother that I'd make sure he got his clarinet. In his rush immediately after the graduation ceremony to check in with the ship, he forgot it. That's a special note to let her know that he replicated one and not only has he been practicing but his music has lifted our spirits continuously over the last four years."

When she said that she looked toward Harry and smiled. He blushed and put his head down. Admiral Paris exhaled, relieved that at least someone on the bridge was actually a Starfleet officer other than Janeway and Tuvok, and amused at the situation considering their current circumstances. Really, this was not the way Janeway envisioned her first communication with Starfleet and hoped it wasn't being recorded but knew that it was. She wasn't prepared for this and it caught her completely off guard. She also didn't think that she'd be defending so many members of her crew at once. Yes, now she sees how odd it is to have a Maquis first officer, a paroled ex con as a chief helmsman, a Borg Astrometrics officer, and Klingon chief engineer. It was probably a heck of a lot more than they expected to find. She's just grateful Neelix didn't take that opportunity to pop onto the bridge with a fresh pot of coffee. She wasn't sure how she'd explain a Talaxian Moral Officer/Ambassador Extrodinare. That definitely wasn't in the Starfleet manual!

"Captain, if you would transfer me to your Ready room I need to have a private word with a member of your crew."

Completely misunderstanding his intent,

"Of course, Admiral! That is completely understandable. Tom..."

Admiral Paris didn't let her get another word out.

"Commander Tuvok, a few minutes of your time."

Yes, Admiral."

Tuvok moved gracefully toward the captain's Ready room. Janeway couldn't believe what just happened and her expression was more than obvious. Only then did she notice Tom staring straight ahead with an impassive mask on his face. She could have kicked herself for being presumptuous. But it just didn't occur to her that after thinking his son was probably dead for the past four years he wouldn't want to speak with him! She hated the fact that she just made that crystal clear to everyone on the bridge so she sat down waiting for Tuvok to end the call that she knew was as much about her as it was about the rest of the crew. Tuvok was the only known and trusted member of the crew. He was Vulcan and he served his first tour of duty in Starfleet long before any of them were born. He'd seen it all. 

She knew they were all questioning her sanity as well as the security of the ship and crew at this point. Tuvok was the only thing that would assure them Voyager shouldn't be shot down on arrival. Janeway slumped back in her chair and tried to keep up appearance for the rest of the bridge crew. She was thanking the heavens that only senior officers happened to be on duty during this time. They would have great deal to discuss later and the Admiral's reactions and comments could at least be contained. She caught Chakotay's eye and nodded knowing they had to talk first. Somehow the welcome home wasn't feeling so welcome to more than a few of them.

Once Tuvok re-entered the bridge he took his station without a word. Janeway ordered helm to continue on their present course at warp 4. Even she didn't have the heart for anything faster at that point. B'Elanna knew the day would come. She'd face it like she swore to face everything else. With honor, no matter what happened. That was not her concern. She really wanted to give Admiral Paris a lashing for his behavior to Seven and especially Tom. She knew it had to hurt and she truly hoped that Tom was blocking out as much as he could. After the staff meeting where he submitted his proposal she understood that he had to be alone after something like that so she would not go to him. She'd simply be there when he was ready to talk. Seven said nothing else after addressing the captain then taking her station. She was keenly aware of the eyes on her across the view screen but gave them nothing. She also made sure to keep her face turned to conceal as many of her Borg implants as possible and made sure to keep her hand down. She was not ashamed but Captain Janeway's use of her human name was all the warning she needed. Seven did not want them studying her too closely.

Tom knew Harry was concerned. The expression on his face as he verified the I.D. told him all he needed to begin preparing for his worse nightmare. Yeah, he'd deal with it later. Something else held his attention after Tuvok took the call in private. Tom did not turn around or give any outward sign of his suspicions but he knew what he felt. Something was most definitely wrong and Tuvok was at the center of it.

After Alpha shift Janeway didn't think she had to tell any of them to hold off broadcasting this latest turn of events. No one except Harry was guaranteed to make it out of this alive. Now she understood that Harry had some specific knowledge or understanding that a call from Admiral Paris would not be a good thing for her ace pilot. She'd deal with that later. There were too many layers to it and too much subtext. She knew she'd have to be at the top of her game before even trying to broach the subject with Tom. She wasn't going to request Tuvok brief her on the subject or substance of his communication with the Admiral. Nope. He'd tell her all he could and she's sure he'd edit out the most damning information while leaving her with all the relevant facts. For someone who did not deal with human emotions, Tuvok was pretty good at understanding them. They understood each other. She did tap Chakotay and lean in.

"Let's not do this in my Ready room. My quarters in an hour. I'll spring for dinner."

"The Last Supper."

"Not in front of the children, Chakotay."

Then she laughed. Because she knew she probably wouldn't be laughing later.

Harry said nothing as they all filed into the turbo lift. Really, he couldn't help thinking it looked like a funeral procession. He was trying not to look at Tom. Tom was forcing himself not to look at Tuvok. B'Elanna and Seven were determined not to look at anybody. Harry got off and followed Tom without a word. He'd walk him to his quarters and if Tom wanted to talk or hang out, they would. Otherwise he wouldn't say anything. As happy as he was that his parents and grandparents wouldn't worry or mourn him anymore, he felt guilty about his part in the whole thing. Magnified communication senors and an upgraded deflector dish! Just great. The captain didn't look the least bit relaxed and Harry caught her tap dancing just like everyone else. It was going to be a mess. Once they were almost to Tom's door he turned to Harry,

"Really, I'm alright. I just need some time alone. Got a lot to work through."

Harry looked at him carefully. He just wanted to make sure this wasn't going to be the thing that broke Tom. Things had started looking up for him. Word spread about the project and people were amazed and being really nice to him. Asking him questions and treating him with as much respect as the others. He noticed that Tom no longer seemed to care if he had the good opinion of his fellow crewmates but was still polite and unassuming. He hated that every time something started going right for Tom, their was some cosmic conspiracy poised to knock him down.

"Ok, but if you want to talk or hang out, you know I'm always available."

"Yeah. You're my best friend Harry. The best friend I've ever had. I know."

Harry nodded at that and then walked on to his own quarters. He had a lot to think about.

B'Elanna did not get off on deck 9. She stood in the turbo lift silently. Seven noticed that she didn't request the holo deck either so she said nothing. The doors opened and Seven stepped out heading for Cargo bay 2. B'Elanna was right behind her so she knew her friend was offering some support. Seven wasn't sure what her situation would be when they arrived in the Alpha quadrant. Until that communication, it was all theory and the probability wasn't very high. She never mentioned the exact percentage she calculated to the crew. That would not help their situation. It would probably rank up there with one of those offenses the captain explained could incite humans to start throwing tomatoes at you. She did not understand humanity. Why they would through vegetation at a person citing facts was beyond her. Then she remembered this was also the specie who had a propensity to shoot a messenger so she considered tomatoes an acceptable alternative. Seven had the distinct impression from Admiral Paris' reaction that Starfleet Security and Starfleet Medical would not be waiting for her with a bag of tomatoes.

Tuvok entered his quarters and engaged a privacy seal. He absently noted how many times senior staff did that over the last year. Brushing that thought away as irrelevant he headed to his bedroom and changed. Then he made himself comfortable on a meditation pillow and lit his meditation lamp. He had a great deal of work ahead of him. 

Tom sat silently on his couch for several minutes. He knew there was a lot going on. He also knew that Tuvok was certain he'd picked up on something even if he didn't know the extent or specifics. He thought about all that happened on the bridge and he thought about the man doing everything but looking in his direction. His father knew he was sitting there. That's the only reason he didn't bother glancing at the helm while he was checking out everyone else. He wasn't going to get anywhere sitting in the dark so he changed out of his uniform and sat down to work through one of the meditations Tuvok taught him to help expel his emotions. He was most definitely suppressing a great deal on the bridge. Now it was time to face them.

"Eugene, you can't be serious."

"I am. That's my report people. I saw most of it with my own eyes. You all watched the recording."

"A Borg drone as chief Astrometric officer. We don't even have Astrometrics departments on star ships!"

"Well, Hiram, consider their situation. They're in completely uncharted territory."

"True, Tan'lin. And since the Borg probably assimilated half the species in the Delta quadrant it seems she's the best person for the job."

Sarek interjected.

"She did not appear to be a Borg drone."

"You saw the implants!"

"I saw remnants of implants. It is only logical to conclude that she was, at one point, a drone but no longer is."

"So. She's still a potential threat!"

"She could also be a potential break through in both technology and security. Think of what we could learn from her."

"What are you suggesting?"

"Well, it wouldn't take much to get her on a table and find out how it works."

Sarek is as repulsed as a Vulcan can get though he see the logic in that.

"When last I checked, the Federation did not dissect sentient life forms."

"I didn't say that."

"Didn't you?"

"Dr. Crusher, you are the only one here who's had experience with removing implants. What do you say?"

She did not like references to Captain Picard's time with the Borg. Starfleet Security never let him forget it.

"The situation is different and you all know it. We were in the Alpha quadrant. I had access to a great deal of resources and personnel that Voyager does not. And, we have no proof that she wasn't severed from the collective prior to even joining Voyager's crew. She may have been free from the Borg for years before they met her."

"Or not."

"This is pointless. We've done a check on Annika Hanson. She is a Federation citizen, born right here in San Francisco. Her parents were Starfleet researchers. They tracked what we now know was the Borg for years and were lost. We also know that their 6 year old daughter was on board at the time they stopped communicating with us. Where else would she have been for the last 19 years if not with the Borg?"

"She has legal rights. Captain Janeway made her a senior officer. You saw her expression and everyone else's on the bridge. They had no clue what had you so upset. She had free access to the bridge and no security detail. Its obvious, from the limited information we have, that Voyager does not consider her a threat."

"Voyager is not the Federation. If she arrives in the Alpha quadrant in Federation space, she comes to Starfleet Security for...debriefing."

Sarek, again must point out the obvious. Some times humans were too paranoid.

"She has committed no crime that we know of. No greater crime than Jean Luc Picard and he is the captain of our Flagship."

"You want to offer her a commission?"

"Let's not get off track here gentlemen. Eugene, what about Tuvok's findings?"

"According to him, her place on the ship is secure. She is considered a valuable and trusted officer. She has even had command of the ship on more than one occasion."

"What!" The general response from the entire room.

Paris lays out what Tuvok mentioned about the 4 months Voyager was in the dead zone and all of the crew had to be put into stasis. She was in complete control when they were not.

"Interesting. Sensory deprivation does not affect her as normal humans.

Beverly Crusher is compelled to point out some of the things Paris briefed her on earlier to keep people thinking about her as a person and not a lab specimen.

"184 people trusted her not to assimilate them in their sleep or head for the nearest Borg cube. She also leads away missions, has a staff of 30, and has headed engineering at times when the chief engineer is away."

"And that's another thing. What of this Klingon chief engineer?"

Paris is neutral on this because it really doesn't matter at this point.

"It appears that she is a citizen of the Empire from the crew manifest. I suppose opposition to Cardassia was incentive enough for her to join them. We don't know."

Commander Nelson did his homework as soon as he was briefed on Paris' findings. Maquis and Borg on a Federation ship was too much for him. He started researching B'Elanna as soon as he found out there was a Klingon on board Voyager.

"Yes, but further checking reveals a bit more about her."

"Such as?"

"Three years at Starfleet Academy. Dropped out. She had some adjustment problems. Understandable considering the climate and her being Klingon."

Seems several people had the idea to start digging into B'Elanna's past. Admiral Bates, head of Starfleet Security, filled in the rest.

"She was captain of the decathlon team. According to reports, the coach was irate when she dropped out."

That eased the tension and let everyone laugh.

"There's more. This is interesting. Her problems with her professors seemed to be her inability to conform to Starfleet Corps of Engineer standards. She said they were too...restrictive. That and her unwillingness to limit herself to accepted Federation science principles. There's a letter in her permanent file from Dr. Chapman, head of the Engineering department. It states that if she ever wished to return he would sponsor her reapplication without hesitation. I spoke with him and gave him an update on what we learned. He was excited that she was doing what he always said she was capable of."

"She's 25 years old and chief engineer? That could ONLY happen on Voyager."

"Guess you didn't look at her test scores."

He passed the files around.

"Oh."

"Yes. Had she remained, based on these grades, it appears she would have been 1st in her class with the highest grade point average in Starfleet history. Dr. Chapman said she has one of the most complex and fascinating minds he'd ever encountered. I'm not prepared to say anything about her. I have no clue what she's capable of or what she's done so far. In addition to everything else, she's one of the group of the only surviving Maquis. Charges were dropped because we assumed they all died. Now we have two of them serving as senior officers."

"Perhaps there was some duress or pressure placed on Voyager's crew. Perhaps Captain Janeway felt she had to do it."

"It is unlikely they would have all survived four years in the Delta quadrant if that were the case."

"Sarek, must you always be so logical?"

"Yes."

"This is getting us no where. We'll have to wait for Janeway to forward the reports. Something tells me there is a bit of revisionist history taking place right about now."

Paris does not like that comment at all and turns to his colleague with a stern look.

"Be careful how you speak of my protegee. She's fair and by the book. You also keep forgetting Tuvok. He is not under duress and he's the one I trust the most to be objective and logical. Even considering the information I gave him."

Chakotay needed several minutes to sit quietly and process some of the various things that happened on the bridge before meeting with Katherine. Until today, getting home was the mission but it was still abstract. Making contact was surreal and it was a relief to know that family members of the crew would no longer worry. The Maquis were a different story and he wasn't as prepared for how he would address their specific questions, concerns and fears. Yes, he was ready to use that word now after the twice over Admiral Paris gave them. His rather intense inspection of B'Elanna caused him a great deal of concern. Her current situation is unclear. Before the Academy she was a citizen of the Empire and lived the majority of her life on Qo'noS. He's not sure if that will be significant protection. Seven's situation is critical. He has no illusions that a meeting with Starfleet Security and Medical wasn't taking place at that very moment. He knew they were reviewing that recording for every piece of information they could garner. Katherine's use of Seven's human name was a dead give away that she knew exactly what her mentor was going to do. Now they have to seriously consider the possibility that her life will be in danger should she return to the Alpha quadrant. Federation citizen or not, she has Borg implants and even if they don't cut her into pieces, they'll arrest her as a threat. Of that he's certain.

He also has to assimilate some of the other strange things that happened. It was obvious that Harry knows something by his reaction. Finding out who sent the signal was the thing that caused his entire demeanor to change. 

"You would have thought he was announcing that the entire crew except those on the bridge were recently assimilated."

Then he remembered why that wasn't funny.

Chakotay always assumed that Tom was spoiled and privileged. An Admiral's son getting special favors and never having to work for anything. The man didn't look at him once and it was pretty clear to Chakotay that Harry knew that would happen. Now he realizes that there is a lot more going on with Tom Paris than he suspected and that some of his resentment was misplaced. Katherine's words were not lost on him. He did not know that Tom wanted him brought into the loop but she refused. Now he wonders what was going on back then. He has taken a lot of time since that conversation to really search and evaluate his behavior. From strictly a command perspective, Chakotay has to admit that he's been out of line for the last four years. He is the first officer and he allowed his personal feelings to do more than affect ship's business. He knows that many of the crew take their lead from him. He's certain that the Maquis, especially on the lower decks, really gave Paris the treatment Chakotay couldn't on his behalf. That was wrong. Then he considers how he felt Tom made a fool out of him and ruined his credibility. Now he has to admit that his behavior didn't do him any favors.

Once he enters he takes a whiff of the air and turns around with a quizzical expression but doesn't ask.

"Seven explained that I, in my limited individualistic way, managed to confound Borg logic and prove them wrong."

"Ok, I'd love to hear this."

"She informed me that in the last 4 years, she peeked at my replicator logs, I have burned or otherwise destroyed 27 Yankee pot roasts. She then went on to say that I should abandon my obsession with trying to make it and consider a new dish because persistence is futile."

Chakotay didn't think he'd be able to smile at anything for the rest of the night but those words made him laugh openly and it felt good. Once he finally recovered,

"So what are we having tonight?" [Please don't let it be peanut butter and jelly again.]

"I know what you're thinking. No peanut butter and jelly sandwiches."

"Thank you!"

The captain and Chakotay spent a very long night going over their current situation and trying to come up with some solutions. They both realized Seven's predicament was going to be a lot more difficult than they anticipated. As First Officer, Chakotay serves as the JAG (Judge Advocate General) officer on board. He would have to begin researching Federation law to find some kind of protection from what they both assumed was waiting for Seven should she enter the Alpha quadrant. Janeway reminded him of his own status but Chakotay wasn't concerned.

"Katherine, I'm not worried about me. Unlike B'Elanna, I am a Starfleet Academy graduate and a commissioned officer. I earned the rank of Commander. I also knew exactly what I was doing when I joined the Maquis. Everyone's reasons varied, but I had plenty of experience and a complete understanding of the situation. They'll treat me like all the other Starfleet officers charged for the same conduct. Of course, your little song and tap dance about me sacrificing my ship to save all the lives on board Voyager is sure to earn me a few points." 

Then he smirked and leaned back against the couch.

"Are you saying B'Elanna didn't know what she was getting herself into?"

"You aren't going to trick me into going there." They both laughed and he continued.

"She was alone. She'd recently dropped out of the Academy. She had nothing but her displaced anger, her pain and a brilliant mind that craved the opportunity to work as an engineer. I'm not saying she wasn't dedicated or committed to fighting the injustices of the Cardassians. She was. She was also 20 years old with her own problems. 

Technically, the only thing they know to charge her with is being a member of the Maquis. That's enough in it self, but unlike Tom, they didn't catch her in the act of doing anything."

Then realization crossed his face and he poured himself a another glass of their secret stash of contraband Romulan Ale and knocked it back in one shot.

"Then why are you all of a sudden looking worried?"

"Because I just considered some things that make her situation completely different from the other former Maquis members of the crew. I'm not sure what they'll do to her or how they'll treat her especially when they read the reports and find out about Dreadnaught. She designed and built the ultimate smart missile and until we ran into it here in the Delta quadrant, I didn't even understand just how good she really is. She was 21 years old and did it at one of our camps by herself using the materials we were able to get our hands on. She didn't have access to Starfleet personnel or any of the trappings that go along with a sophisticated Federation research lab.

Think Starfleet Security is going to want her running around loose with a pardon? Or running around period after serving whatever time they give her? Nope. Not to mention that she now has access to a great deal of classified Starfleet information as well as an extensive amount of knowledge of Intrepid class ships. Not that you'd know it by the amount of Borg enhancements she made to the ship. That's another thing. Her knowledge and obvious success with adapting Borg and various other Delta quadrant based tech to Federation equipment. I'm sure they'll consider her almost as much of a threat as Seven if she's allowed to go free."

Janeway hadn't thought about it to that extent or that negatively. She knew they'd have problems but hearing someone else say it out loud just made everything seem worse. In an act unbecoming a Starfleet captain she reached over and picked up the bottle of Romulan Ale, tipped it back to her mouth and took a long swig. [This is going to be a mess!]

They all seemed to recover to some degree or another during the night and assembled around the conference table for the meeting none of them wanted to have. Just as she suspected, her neck was hanging in the noose along with everyone else's. No one, including the captain, uttered a word during his report. No one made any comments afterward. They were simply riding the wave trying to take everything in. After Tuvok completed his report the captain started to speak. It was only then that she realized he was not finished. The pause meant this information was relevant but not connected to the rest of his report.

"I apologize for cutting you off. Go ahead Tuvok."

"As a result of certain observations during the sub space communication, it was deemed—necessary that as head of Voyager's security I be made aware of some specific events that occurred recently so that I prepare to act accordingly."

That was just cryptic enough to raise the tension level in the room even higher.

"Alright." She doesn't want to know this, she's sure. She knows he's stalling so it must be bad.

"Chancellor Gowron unilaterally nullified the Khitomer Accords. The Klingon Empire is no longer a friend of the Federation."

With that last sentence Chakotay and Janeway heard B'Elanna's back door slam shut. Neither had a chance to pull her aside before the meeting to explain their take on her unique situation. The captain wanted to sit both B'Elanna and Seven down to try to allay their concerns and get their input on what can be done about their unusual circumstances. This new twist was not helping. Harry hoped things couldn't get any worse last night. He know realizes that was merely a pipe dream. Neelix is trying to figure out the best way to be of assistance in case she becomes distraught. Tom is still dealing with something else but he figures there's a size 14 shoe hanging somewhere above just waiting to drop.

Everyone turned to look at B'Elanna. She was shocked. But she was also confused. Why, after all these years, would that happen? She knew she was 4 years out of the loop of information but she could not, for the life of her, figure out what could possibly cause something like that to happen. Her mind was racing to solve the mystery with the facts she had. Everyone was looking at her with concern because she's just sitting quietly with a thoughtful yet intense expression on her face. Then she looks over at Tuvok and surprised them all,

"Romulans or Cardassians?"

He did not think she had it in her and merely raised an eyebrow in response. She knew the meaning behind that particular gesture. The Vulcan non verbal for touche. 

"Cardassians."

They seemed to be having their own private conversation so no one interrupted and no one was going to try. B'Elanna nods absently then makes a huge leap that even Tuvok wasn't prepared for. Hey, she can't help thinking of the worse case scenario considering the crappy life she had so its not that big of a jump.

"Am I under arrest?"

Eyes wide and mouths hanging open, everyone was shocked by that question and even the captain didn't have the faintest idea why B'Elanna would ask it. There were the obligatory and customary gasps and sounds of shock and outrage from her friends around the table. She ignored them. Tuvok did as well.

"Not at this time."

"Ok, give me...6 hours warning. I'll need to prepare Engineering and there's some personal stuff I have to do. I promise I won't run."

"Your honor would not permit you to do so. I am not concerned."

Genuinely touched, "Thank you."

Then they both turned back to the rest of the group like they were chatting about the weather. Some times a captain should not know certain things. Some times a Starfleet officer shouldn't know things so that there is plausible deniability in the future. She knew this was one of those times. She didn't care. 

"One or both of you will explain why B'Elanna questions if she is under arrest. She has no connection to whatever political maneuvering has recently taken place in the Alpha quadrant."

B'Elanna threw Tuvok the 'I got this one look' and then turned to the captain.

"This isn't political maneuvering. Many things must be happening in the Alpha quadrant that we are unaware of because the balance of power is shifting or being shifted by several key players. Tuvok didn't say the Klingon High Council. He said Gowron, unilateral, nullify and Khitomer all in the same sentence. That means something very specific has occurred within the Empire. It also means that the Federation involved itself in the affairs of the Empire to a degree that, that interference had to have led to some small scale direct conflict. Whatever is happening was originally between the Empire and the Cardassians. I'd guess armed invasion and occupation of Cardassian territory for expansion or as retaliation. For the Empire to take that step means it believed something significant changed or was about to change within the Cardassian government. 

Federation involvement, ie direct opposition to what the Empire felt was its affair and no one else's, led the High Council to relinquish ALL its power to the Chancellor to do whatever must be done. NOTHING has ever occurred in our history to provoke that kind of reaction. That means every member of the High Council and every Klingon in the Empire is pissed. The Federation must have allied itself with Cardassia against the Empire for the High Council to have moved in this way.

The logical conclusion is that Starfleet Intelligence suspects that the Klingon Empire is about to declare full scale war against the Federation. It is also logical to conclude that Starfleet Command has revoked my field commission or deemed it invalid. They would not have ordered Tuvok to 'act accordingly' had they not officially ruled that I am not a Starfleet officer. This is a Federation ship. I am not a Federation citizen. Congratulations captain, when war officially breaks out, I get to be your first P.O.W."

Then she laughed dryly, shook her head and sat back in her chair. They were all torn between staring at B'Elanna and turning to stare at Tuvok so they did both. No one said anything as they tried to take it all in. This made no sense. They weren't sure which was more shocking—being at war with the Empire or that Starfleet actually wanted Tuvok to arrest B'Elanna as a prisoner of war if it should happen. 

The captain is finally able to speak as she leans back in her seat and closes her eyes,

"This is too much. What ever happened to getting good news from home?"

Chakotay can't believe its happening again. But the Klingons? He just can't see how the Federation would side against the Klingons in favor of Cardassia. 

Harry turns to Tuvok genuinely confused, 

"Tuvok, is she right? The Federation joined with Cardassia against the Klingons?"

"B'Elanna did an excellent job of reasoning through the situation. Everything she said is true."

Seven lost all her composure with that.

"This is illogical! I will not even attempt to address the personal implications of this nonsense because it is apparent that those considerations did not factor into their decision. Captain, you taught me about Federation values and its ideals of inclusion and respect for individuals while in pursuit of a policy of cooperation and peaceful coexistence. Where is this famed Federation commitment to justice and individual liberty I have been studying all these years? 

Perhaps I should remain silent and implement 'don't rock the boat protocol' because I am certain that Starfleet and the Federation powers that be hold little regard for my personal or individual liberties and are likely formulating a legitimate reason for Tuvok to arrest me as well. Perhaps my mere existence will serve as sufficient justification. But I will not be silent on this. If Starfleet will not adhere to its espoused code of honor, I will. 

There is no logical basis for their decision from a pragmatic perspective. The purpose of confinement of P.O.Ws is for military or political leverage. What leverage can B'Elanna give them in the middle of the Delta quadrant? There is no political collateral to be gained from this course of action. The act of singling out B'Elanna specifically and revoking her field commission strikes me as nothing more than malicious contempt and racial prejudice. B'Elanna has done nothing but fulfill her duty to this ship and its crew for over 4 years. Starfleet has not even bothered to learn anything about her contribution, her performance as an officer or her genius as an engineer.

We are 60,000 light years from the nearest Federation outpost or space station and Starfleet Command has ordered Tuvok to arrest our Chief Engineer? That is not logical. We are constantly under attack from numerous hostile species with no support and no allies in unchartered and unfamiliar space and they expect us to incarcerate our Chief Engineer? 

There are 185 organic beings on Voyager and only one of them is Klingon. Starfleet holds the power because this happens to be a Federation ship. With the exception of the Bajoran members of this crew and Neelix, everyone else on this ship is a Federation citizen. But as Bajor is under consideration for membership in the Federation, I suspect those crewmen will be given some special dispensation. B'Elanna has no protection, no outside support system and they know this. pujwI' HIvlu'chung quvbe'lu'. There is no honor in attacking the weak. That is what this is, an attack. What is their recommendation should no peaceful solution to this situation arise? What will happen should the Empire prevail against the Federation in this pending war? Is Tuvok to release B'Elanna so that she can arrest everyone else as P.O.Ws in the name of the Empire? I can find no logic in this. It is madness!"

That is as irate and emotional as they have ever seen Seven and no one says anything for several moments as they simply stare at her. Tuvok's secretly pleased with Seven's response and B'Elanna's rational demeanor. B'Elanna turns to her and smiles warmly.

"Dujeychung jagh nIv yItuHQo'."

Seven is starting to regain her composure but is still visibly distressed. She looks B'Elanna straight in the eye and responds.

"nIteb Qob qaD jup 'e' chaw'be' SuvwI." 

After a few moments of silence the captain stands. She looked around the table sizing up each of her officers carefully then nodded as she came to some internal decision. She placed one hand on Seven's shoulder in a calming gesture before she spoke.

"Harry?"

"Yes, captain."

"Take Norma Rae here to the mess hall for a cup of herbal tea. Chakotay, start working that project. Tom, you have the bridge. B'Elanna—let's take a walk."

Admiral Bates was not as floored as the reassembled group sitting around the conference table stunned into silence because he had time to get over his shock after watching the recording numerous times. He really did not know what to think when he received the incoming transmission. Tuvok's orders to record the briefing and forward it directly to Starfleet Security were clear so he had no doubt that they would be carried out. He was prepared for typical Klingon outrage and some degree of violence. Perhaps a few bloody noses and some broken bones. He was not prepared for this young woman to sit there and quietly piece together the situation or arrive that the correct conclusion on her own. Tuvok was ordered not to disclose that information. How she figured it out was a complete mystery until Bates considered the words of Dr. Chapman. [Complex mind huh?] But the Borg's reaction was beyond anything he expected. Honestly, he did not expect her to have a reaction. This was both a test of Tuvok's loyalty as much as a means to gain insight on Captain Janeway's competency. Her unusual behavior and decisions with regard to the Maquis and bringing a Borg drone onto a Federation ship as crew had everyone at Starfleet Command and Security questioning her fitness for command. This made more than a few people sit back and rethink the situation.

Commander Nelson asked the only question he could think of.

"What was that exchange at the end between the Klingon and the Borg?"

Sarek's patience is constantly tested by his colleagues but he responds nonetheless.

"The Klingon's name is B'Elanna, as you well know. She said there is nothing shameful in falling before a superior enemy. Miss. Hanson responded that a warrior does not let a friend face danger alone."

"So, she considers Starfleet and the Federation the enemy. Then Eugene's original order seems justified."

Ta'lin doesn't have Vulcan patience to contend with, she's Andorian and really does not care,

"Where do you get these things? Did you not just watch the same recording as the rest of us? The use of the term enemy has nothing to do with Starfleet or the Federation and you know it. Aside from it being an expression, it is more accurately directed at someone harboring thoughts like yours. Everything both those young women said is true and we all know it."

"It would seem that Miss. Hanson has unknowingly demonstrated that she is not a Borg drone for those who still retain some doubt on the matter. It would also seem that she has a much stronger grasp of Federation values than others. Any question as to her humanity or sentience should be put to rest. Her commitment to logical interpretation is encouraging. B'Elanna appears to have a unique ability to extrapolate information and follow through to the logical conclusion. Most interesting and most refreshing."

"Don't start handing out IDIC medals just yet Sarek. She's still Maquis and she's still a citizen of the Empire."

"She didn't sound Maquis to me, Hiram. Go back and listen to her last words. I think that uniform means a hell of a lot more to her than we realized. And I should point out that while many of the people in this room have consistently made negative comments and assumptions about her, she has remained neutral in both her assessment and her opinion of Starfleet and the Federation. No offense Sarek, but she was damned near Vulcan in her methodical approach to figuring out the situation here."

"I take no offense, Dr. Crusher. Indeed, it was a compliment."

Bates said nothing up until this point. He still wasn't sure about Annika Hanson but he was also a practical military man. The plans they drew up for both of them were necessary. He does admit that her words have caused him more than a few moments pause.

"Miss. Hanson was impassioned in her criticism of our actions with regard to B'Elanna. Captain Janeway appears to be mentoring her so that might answer some questions as to her—ability to live within the Federation. I find B'Elanna's grasp of political strategy interesting for someone with no practical experience in the area. Her observations were astute and she came to the right conclusion with nothing more than a statement from Tuvok."

"What are you saying?"

"Just what I said and no more. There is obviously more to both women than we originally assumed. We are not the only ones with a copy of this recording. Dr. Pulaski, I think it will be a bit more difficult than you first imagined to get Miss. Hanson on the table once the Judge Advocate General gets a hold of this."

She didn't want to admit it but those were her thoughts as well. She also did not like Beverly Crusher's involvement or knowledge of this matter. Crusher would oppose all her attempts. She is their only expert in this field but Pulaski is the head of Starfleet Medical and she sees the potential for scientific advancement slipping through her fingers.

Ellis Vaughan said nothing on either woman at any point since Bates asked him to return to Starfleet HQ for a meeting on Voyager. He read Eugene's report and watched the recording of his conversation with Janeway with interest. He made no comment on the briefing notes as he prepared to sit in on this meeting. Many times he struggled not to laugh. This was one of the best shows he'd seen in a while. He caught Bates' eye. Yeah, there were a lot of things he was going to have to address in private but he had to say something now.

"Miss. Hanson raised a valid point that we were unaware of. We do not know their situation except that Voyager is alone in the Delta quadrant. If we actually want them to return to the Alpha quadrant should we incarcerate their Chief Engineer? We haven't gotten Janeway's reports so we don't know anything that she may have done. She was 21 years old. There's a reason Janeway made her Chief Engineer at that age. I think we might very well be putting the ship and crew in jeopardy for no valid—dare I say logical—reason other than our own policies here. 

And how long do we expect Tuvok to keep her in the brig if we do go to war with the Empire? Unless they find a worm hole or some other way home, it's a 60 year trip. She supposed to stay in there for that long? She may not have graduated from the Academy but it obviously wasn't because she didn't have the ability. It was because of the prejudice and intolerant climate that we all know exists. Point is, she gave it her all for 3 years. Is this how we treat a former Starfleet cadet?"

Then he sat back in his chair having said all he intended to say on the matter.

Two hours later the heads of Stafleet Security, Intelligence and Command assembled in a secure room with Commander Ellis Vaughan to discuss the particulars of the situation.

Admiral Macleod of Starfleet Intelligence turned to Vaughan to get his opinion.

"Ellis, you haven't said much. What's your take on this Voyager situation?"

"You guys should have called me earlier."

That set off warning bells. They all noticed that he was looking at Paris when he said that. Never one to back down or shy away from anything,

"You've got something to say?"

"I'm just wondering why you gave Tuvok the order on B'Elanna so quickly. You didn't even know she'd attended the Academy at the time."

"Considering the circumstances it seemed prudent."

"Uh huh. And now that you've had more than a 10 second look at her do you think that order was necessary, especially without any of the facts?"

"If you've got something to say, say it."

"This is going to get messy. Legally, there shouldn't be too much of a problem. But if the press finds out it could be a huge scandal."

"Ellis, you have the cat that ate the canary look. What do you know? And what's the press got to do with it?"

"I'm just wondering if any of you researched her background."

Bates exhaled. If that's all he was worried about there wasn't a problem.

"Yeah, you weren't here for the briefing yesterday. Besides, it wasn't that hard. Only two Klingons have ever been accepted into Starfleet Academy. It was easy to check her out."

Vaughan shook his head at their mistake in not seeing the potentially sticky situation.

"Half Klingon. An extremely important fact you all seem determined to overlook." 

"I'm not following you and I'm not liking where this is going."

"Follow this. Her father is Admiral Enrique Torres."

Dead silence after every head in the room snapped around and stared at him in disbelief. That makes absolutely no sense to any of them and it wasn't something they were prepared for Vaughan to say. No one is sure what to think about that. 

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. Fleet Admiral Torres. Commander of the 7th Fleet. The guy who, by the way out ranks all of us, happens to be in charge of keeping the Romulans away. The guy whose daughter you ordered arrested as a Federation P.O.W. Hmm."

Bates and Paris just stare at each other. Macleod is kind of ticked. As head of Starfleet Intelligence he hates how Vaughan shows him up some times but since this is really juicy stuff he lets that slide.

"How do you know that?"

All he gets is an incredulous look in return.

"Never mind forget I questioned your abilities. But it wasn't on her Starfleet application. Her father is listed as John Torres. Nothing in her record connects them and she never mentioned it to anyone."

"Gee, I wonder why. Enrique Juan Torres. Juan is still Spanish for John guys."

Paris isn't going to be taken to task for his decision. And he doesn't like Vaughan's sarcasm.

"She's Maquis. I made no special requests or consideration for...Tom. She shouldn't get any."

"We aren't meeting about a Maquis issue and you know it. We're meeting because you ordered Tuvok to arrest her as a P.O.W. because she is Klingon. Not for anything she did but because of her DNA. Hanson was dead on in her assessment of why B'Elanna's field commission was revoked."

"Its war time."

"Yep, in the Alpha quadrant. But in the Delta quadrant its just 185 people trying not to get blown apart while they take the longest trip in Starfleet history. They have no way of communicating with anyone in the Alpha quadrant except through Pathfinder. Its not like any of them knew what was going on here. You couldn't have waited a day or so to get some more information? Perhaps there was an argument to be made that she is a Federation citizen. But that doesn't matter, its done now."

Bates still has his concerns about Seven but wants more information on B'Elanna.

"I have never seen Enrique with any Klingon."

"Yeah and no sailor ever left a little something extra behind when pulling out of port."

"Now you have something to say?"

Donald Mcleod hadn't really said anything since they entered the room. He just wanted information.

"There was no sorted one night stand or pit stop in port. Enrique was married. That's right, he was married to a nice respectable Daughter of the Empire. Miral was a botanist doing research on Kessik 4. They split up when B'Elanna was 5. The two of them moved back to Qo'noS and never saw him again."

"Well I'll be damned."

"You think B'Elanna knows who he is?" (who said men don't gossip?)

"Only she can answer that and she's obviously not talking about it. You think its just a coincidence that she left Qo'noS—all the way in the Beta quadrant—bypassed a hell of a lot of campuses and came all the way to San Francisco just to attend the Academy? She listed a father on her application then. Now, according to that crew manifest, she doesn't even acknowledge that she ever had a father so what does that tell you? Then again, maybe she doesn't know since he's still alive."

The others laugh. Vaughan doesn't.

"I was serious. Hey, I'm no expert on Klingon honor but something tells me ditching your kid for 12 years and then ignoring her or pretending she doesn't exist while she's studying at the academy for an organization in which he is one of the highest ranking officials qualifies as a dishonorable act. From the way Tuvok spoke to her she follows the code. Heck, she just found out she's about to be arrested as soon as he gets word that we're at war and she wants a grace period so she can make final arrangements with her engineering staff. You heard her, 'there is nothing shameful in falling to a superior enemy'. Sounds like an honorable woman to me.

But the point you're forgetting is HE knows who she is. Deadbeat dad or not, think he'll want his daughter locked up as a P.O.W.? I'm thinking not. But even if he keeps quiet, it could still get out. I know, wonder who else knows? And that's when everything gets messy and public. Starfleet Admiral allows his Klingon daughter to rot in the brig of a Federation ship lost in the Delta quadrant while the Federation is at war with the Klingon Empire. Oh yeah, the headlines, I can just picture them now."

Bates and Macleod aren't looking well at this point. Paris isn't sure what to think about this. He was just so shocked with everything he saw on the bridge, not to mention having to deal or not deal with his son. Maybe it was a bit rash. Watching today's recording confused and irritated him. Katie giving his screw up command of her bridge was too much. Still, he isn't ready to concede.

"Well, it gave us a chance to get some inside information and see how they operate."

Vaughan is remembering why he keeps turning down promotions. He could have been an Admiral 50 years ago but likes what he does and the lower rank conceals his covert activities. He spends more time in the field than all these guys have combined in the last 15 years.

"Yeah. Gave us an up close and personal view of Annika Hanson. Pretty spunky isn't she? I always liked spunky women." 

Then he laughs. The others just stare at him. Macleod is compelled to speak.

"You can't be serious. She's Borg."

"Keep telling yourselves whatever you need to keep the fear and the prejudice alive. You guys know exactly what you heard and saw. She isn't a Borg drone and all we know it. I can't tell you all how to run your divisions but the three of you have to see the legal and political mind field staring you in the face. She read you guys like a book. And I'm going to pretend, at least for the rest of the day, that there wasn't some discussion yesterday about dissecting her. Because that's what it sounded like to me."

"We've taken steps to prepare to assess any potential threat she might be to the Federation. That is one of our responsibilities."

"Hope you calculated the Janeway factor."

"What are you talking about?"

"She's your protegee, Eugene. You know her better than all of us. I don't know her personally so all I'm going on is what I saw."

"And what did you see?"

"Same thing you guys did. Once she got over the shock and Annika came down off the mountain top, I saw a captain loading her guns about to circle the wagons to protect her crew."

"She can hardly defy a direct order."

"Order to do what? And how are you going to enforce it from 60,000 light years away? They have been in the Delta quadrant for 4 years. Think about the knowledge they must have gained. We have no idea about the skills or abilities of the rest of the crew but you guys decided to go after two of the ones I'd lay odds could have been of invaluable assistance to the Federation."

"What do you mean could have been?"

"I think B'Elanna probably won't set foot in Federation space again. I wouldn't if I were her. And, if Janeway can arrange it, I'm sure there'll be a Klingon War Bird or two waiting to pick her up as soon as they get close enough to home. Hmm, Miss. Hanson seems to have a strong foundation in Klingon honor, justifiable disillusionment and fear of Starfleet and the Federation, and a flare for the language. She and B'Elanna seem close. Might be room enough for two on that ship."

Then he leaned back in his chair and propped his feet on the coffee table while the other three men sat silently thinking about the situation.


	6. Aftershocks

B'Elanna changed out of her uniform then put it and all the others into the mini recycling unit. Captain Janeway went out of her way earlier to explain thatwasn't necessary but B'Elanna wouldn't hear of it. 

"I understand that you're trying to help and I appreciate it. But, the truth is that I am not entitled to wear the uniform and this is just another one of those things you'll have to list under miscellaneous Klingon honor if you don't understand."

"No, I understand. I do not like it. I have been given no order contravening your field commission so as far as I'm concerned it still stands."

"Yeah, but we already know they did it. Forwarding the order is just a formality. Probably didn't want to tip us off. I'm alright, captain."

"Are you?"

"No, but I'm gonna be."

She studied the young woman in front of her carefully just to make sure. There was no way of talking B'Elanna out of this so she gave up trying.

"I thought a warrior never surrendered. How come you were willing to be arrested?"

B'Elanna exhaled slowly on that one. It was complicated and she had several different rules to contend with.

"True but there are some exceptions to the rule. The general rule is that I either have to kill all of you or I have to kill myself to prevent dishonor."

Janeway turned white and just stared open mouthed.

"Don't worry captain. I'm not going to try to kill any of you."

"But...what about yourself?"

"That's the tricky part. I can't do that yet because there another matter of honor I have to complete first. Besides, there's a general exception to the P.O.W. thing."

"Which is?"

"A warrior can remain alive in captivity if they feel there is an opportunity to avenge themselves against their enemy later. Basically live, grow stronger and fight another day."

Relieved that B'Elanna wouldn't require ritual suicide watch, she's still not sure about that last part.

"I know what you're thinking captain. No one on this ship is my enemy. Let's just leave it at that."

Satisfied and aware there's nothing she can do about it, the captain let's it go. 

"You realize that the next time you go to the brig it will be for the same reasons you've gone in the past. Because of something you actually did. Not because of some ridiculous order."

"Captain...."

"Nope. That's not up for discussion. My brig is off limits to you, period. Tuvok can file a report with whomever, I don't care. I might not be able to make you wear the uniform if you don't want to, but there is no way you are getting out of being Chief Engineer. I expect you to work your shifts and continue on just as you always have. No discussion on the matter."

B'Elanna couldn't help but smile.

"Thank you, captain."

"Don't thank me. I'm doing it for purely selfish and logical reasons. You are the most qualified for the job." Then she laughed.

"Yeah, I'm gonna have to go see Seven later. She really worked herself up. I always knew she had it in her, just a surprise to see it come out because of me."

"That shouldn't surprise you. I don't know what caused the change in your relationship and I'm not going to pry but it was a good thing. The two of you getting along has really helped my blood pressure."

Tom walked into the Observation Lounge and saw Tuvok staring out one of the large viewers. If it was possible for a Vulcan to look pensive, that one was. Tom didn't say anything as he walked over and took a seat near by. Instead of striking up conversation, he busied himself going over the progress report he was drafting on the Flyer to send the captain. They were almost finished and the production was a head of schedule. All things considered, he was pleased. When they got to the testing phase, if all checked out, then he'd relax. 

After another 10 minutes Tuvok turned around and looked at him. Humans normally did not stay quiet long. While they claimed to love peace and quiet, they were always moving around. Tuvok also noticed that there was some biological imperative within humans to break silence. Something in them made them feel uncomfortable if no one spoke for long periods of time. Tuvok did not understand this when he first encountered humans. It was...annoying if he had to choose an emotional word. He wouldn't admit that out loud, though. It took some time, many decades in fact, before Tuvok understood the cause of it. Humans were not telepathic. They had no way to discern, other than with body language or conversation, if there was danger, displeasure, or fear on the part of the other person. Remaining silent, impassive and unmoving caused humans a great deal of discomfort because they could not tell if the situation was negative or not. 

Tom Paris appeared to be like every other human he'd met in the beginning. Not until after he stopped projecting his false image did Tuvok notice the change. He also understood the reason. Tom was empathic. He didn't need words to discern the motivations of others. So, he was unaffected by large gaps of silence. That helped their friendship. He was certain that Tom was aware of his concerns and some of his actions over the past two days. He appreciated that Tom remained silent on the subject and had not sought him out until now. Vulcans were not versed or comfortable with small talk. On some level, he knew he did not have to attempt it with Tom but he still tried his hand at getting the conversation started.

"Tom."

And that's as small as Vulcan small talk gets.

"Hey, what's up?"

"I was reflecting on some of the recent events."

Tom knew Tuvok did not relish his role in what was going down with B'Elanna. He wanted to talk to her as well but knew she was probably still with the captain. For some reason Tom felt the need to confess or apologize.

"I'm sorry you were put in that position. I know that stuff came straight from my dad. He's a real piece of work."

It was hard to disguise the disgust and contempt in his voice though he did a pretty good job trying. Tuvok would not comment on that last part. He knew Eugene Paris was a source of deep pain for Tom and wouldn't be the cause of him dwelling on it. 

"You are not responsible for the decisions made or given by Starfleet Command."

"Still..."

Tuvok held up his hand to forestall the argument.

"It is not your fault. It is a matter of chain of command and you are not within it. All things considered, it was not as...devastating as it could have been."

"Yeah, B'Elanna shocked the hell out of me. Though I'm learning that she has some really strange abilities and her mind doesn't work like other people's."

That was interesting.

"How so?"

"Well, when I made my little confession a few months ago, she reached over and took my hand but I couldn't feel anything. Not one single thing from her. I asked her about it later and she really couldn't explain. Except something about when she is solving a problem her brain sort of shuts everything else off or down. She's completely emotionless. Detached from all feelings."

That was news to Tuvok and he wasn't sure what that meant but it did fit with the display he witnessed earlier.

"Intriguing. It was fascinating to witness her work through the situation in such a logical manner. She appears to have the capability for extremely ordered higher reasoning when she chooses."

"Don't let her hear you say that. It might offend her Klingon sensibilities."

"Yes, I can see the...wisdom of that."

Tom took a minute to study his friend. He wasn't sure how his next comment would go over. He had no proof but considered that there wasn't much of a need for psycho therapy on Vulcan.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"My orders are classified."

"True, but your impressions of their ramifications on the crew aren't."

That's the best way Tom could get around using the word feelings. No sense insulting the man. Tuvok appeared to consider the matter for a few seconds and then sat down across from him.

"Voyager's situation is unique. We have melded two crews and overcome differences of philosophy and affiliation that our counterparts in the Alpha quadrant have not considered. They have also not had the opportunity to work and live with Seven throughout her growth and development."

Yeah, Tom thought it was going to be bad. He didn't see the look on his father's face because he made sure not to look at him but the silence was deafening. Captain Janeway calling her Annika told him all he needed to know. Tom took a few seconds to phrase his words carefully.

"B'Elanna was right? There's a lot of stuff going on back home that we don't know about. Things have changed that drastically?"

"Yes."

"You know the captain isn't going to let you arrest B'Elanna?"

"Yes."

"Is Starfleet under that impression?"

"No."

"Good." 

Then he considered that Tuvok seemed much more relaxed after Seven's explosion and the captain's way of ending the meeting. He sat back to stare at him hard for a few minutes.

"Would Starfleet now be in a position to consider the way the crews have been melded or have an opportunity to witness Seven's growth since she was freed from the Borg?"

If he could have smirked, Tuvok would have. Instead he merely raised that eyebrow in classic form. Tom, like Harry and B'Elanna no longer found it annoying. Especially since they have learned to read the different meanings behind it.

"Perhaps."

"Uh huh. And if someone had the correct security clearance, would a check of the ship's computer reveal any recent transmissions to—say Starfleet Security? Like a recording of a certain meeting that took place several hours ago?"

Just a hint of hesitation before the answer gave Tom all he needed.

"Perhaps."

"Uh huh. That isn't going to be a regular thing is it?"

"I believe Starfleet has all the information it can handle."

That was as good of an answer as he was going to get. Didn't matter, he knew. When Tom took a few minutes to consider the entire meeting he recognized the potential for serious disaster and fall out if everyone hadn't been so quiet and reserved. Normally, that wouldn't have been the case but each of them were shell shocked. Still reeling from yesterday's events. He unconsciously tilted his head to the left while looking at Tuvok. Tuvok recognized that as the sign that Tom required more detailed information on the subject but wasn't going to ask. They couldn't have that conversation in a public lounge.

"It is almost time for the evening meal. Perhaps a game of Kalto?"

"Sure. Just don't tell Harry you let me play some times or I'm gonna hear about it later."

"My silence is assured. I do not believe it would cause a great deal of dissension as he has found other activities to occupy his time. He has become quite accomplished at the Vulcan Lute."

"I heard. B'Elanna calls it a banjo."

Tom didn't say anything about Tuvok's reaction but he just had one more date to mark on his calender.

Seven reclined on Harry's couch while he replicated dinner. She was much calmer after their visit to the mess hall earlier but he still didn't want to give her too much time alone. Harry knew that Seven wasn't really alright when they left because she didn't seem the least bit interested in heading to Astrometrics. Seven not wanting to work? That was a sign that all wasn't so well. Instead, they spent the remainder of the day together. Harry being Harry didn't push or try to bring up some of the things he knew were weighing on her. Instead, he let Seven choose what they'd talk about and what they did. An afternoon of Flotter on the holo deck with Naomi Wildman wasn't what he expected to do but he had to admit it was kind of fun acting like a kid again. On occasion, a member of the crew is compelled to point out that he and Naomi are the youngest people on the ship. He let's that slide some times. Today it was the perfect excuse if he got caught. Sam Wildman didn't say anything when she strolled onto the holo deck and saw what they were doing. Thankfully, she just covered her laughter with a cough and joined in.

Now, Seven seemed relaxed and they were just hanging out for the evening. She asked him to play something on the clarinet and he was happy to oblige. Any amount of practice time was good as far as he was concerned. Truth be told, while he was making sure that Seven was alright, Harry was still trying to come to terms with everything he'd witnessed over the past two days. When he thought about the emotional roller coaster ride everyone was on, he wondered how they got any work done. Tuvok was Tuvok during the meeting but Harry could tell he didn't like his orders or the way Starfleet was acting one bit. That meant there was more stuff to come. He never completely understood what drove Starfleet officers to the Maquis. Chakotay, he could understand. The Cardassians devastated his home and killed all of his people. Something like that had to cut deep and make one snap. In theory, he understood that everyone had their own reasons. Tom and B'Elanna's seem clear. But, not until this week did he really understand what could motivate a Starfleet officer to throw up their hands and yell, enough.

Going after B'Elanna was a cheap shot. He knew it and it reeked hypocrite. Harry might not have had the words to express himself as Seven did or been able to recover from the shock so quickly to speak them but he knew every word she said was true. He didn't know what was happening in the Alpha quadrant any more than the rest of them [except Tuvok, I'm sure Admiral Paris gave him an ear full.] but he couldn't wrap his mind around the Federation allying itself with the Cardassians. How were the Bajorans handling that??? He was certain of one thing, all hell was breaking loose back home. Many times over the past day, Harry had to admit that life in the Delta quadrant wasn't so bad. Compared to a place where Cardassians and the Federation were preparing the fight Klingons, yeah, the Delta quadrant was looking mighty good to him. Sure, he didn't have all the facts but they'd only been gone four years. Not that much could have changed!

"Thank you for your assistance today. I had not realized my ability to—work myself up. That is a strange expression but it is the appropriate one. Is it not?"

Harry chuckled before responding. Classic Seven.

"Yeah, you got it right. Little feisty there. But, everything you said was true and we all needed to hear it."

He wasn't sure if she was ready to talk about herself yet or if she could only deal with B'Elanna's situation. Seven picked up on that.

"I am well aware, by Starfleet's recent actions, that I am considered a threat to the Federation. Admiral Paris was not exactly discreet during his—inspection of the bridge."

"No, I think we all knew it was going to be trouble. The captain wasn't so discreet herself."

That made Seven smile.

"Yes. She is very good at misdirecting while remaining truthful. She gave me sufficient warning to prepare for their response."

"You have to realize that Captain Janeway isn't going to allow Tuvok to do anything to you. Heck, Tuvok isn't going to do anything to you. He's Vulcan so he'll find a way to get around a direct order."

"That is only as far as Voyager is concerned. The reality of my situation on arrival in the Alpha quadrant is another matter and entirely out of his hands."

"Look, I'm the poster boy for eagerness in wanting to return home. I know that. But even I understand that we could be at this for years. Hell, our grand kids might make part of the trip."

"It will be a tight fit should everyone wish to procreate."

They both laughed at that.

"True, Voyager wasn't intended to be a generational ship but it wasn't intended for exploring the Delta quadrant either. You're always telling us to seek and embrace our individuality and uniqueness. I think this more than counts."

"True. What is your opinion on the supposed changes in the Alpha quadrant?"

"If you're talking about war or this alliance with Cardassia, I'm glad I'm in the Delta quadrant."

She just stared at him.

"Yeah, I said that. Look, I miss my family just as much as I always have but I don't like the rest of this stuff. And, its partly my fault."

"How so?"

"They couldn't have made contact with us if I hadn't been so determined to make the communications upgrades and modifications no matter how great this Pathfinder station is."

"You had no control over the Federation's alliance. Those things were happening with or without us. Starfleet's reaction to me was inevitable. Their reaction to B'Elanna is deplorable but it is better this way."

"Huh?"

"Had we simply arrived in Federation space two days ago without warning of the threat to many of us the results would be much more severe. Now we have time to prepare. And, there are some things we cannot change. Such as the minds and hearts of those making the decisions in Starfleet. But, as you said, our return might not be for years to come."

"Never thought I'd consider that a good thing."

Knowing she couldn't put it off much longer, the next day Captain Janeway made an announcement.

"All hands, this is the captain. Stand down. There is no emergency. This is a general announcement to alert you all of some very encouraging news. Starfleet made real time contact with us. The Romulans forwarded our message and Starfleet has been working diligently to create a communications system for contact. It is called the Pathfinder station. Its sole purpose was to initiate and maintain contact with Voyager throughout our journey and to be of assistance in helping us get home. Thanks to the modifications and upgrades made by Harry Kim, they were finally able to reach us.

I forwarded them an updated copy of the crew manifest and Starfleet is in the process of contacting our families to let them know of our location and condition. This is a good thing and should ease their minds considerably. Pathfinder will be our point of contact throughout the trip. They are working on establishing a regular mail delivery system. It will take time to collect all the letters and then send them through this distance at sub space. They have not given me the particulars but I would imagine every couple of months. Until they made contact with us, they only had hope and the word of the Romulans so they did not know for certain if they would find us. Now that they have and know our current heading, they can get to work on phase two. Let's all be patient while they work. In the meantime, start drafting those letters home. Janeway out."

Later that week, Admiral Francis O'Reilly, Starfleet Judge Advocate General had to watch the recording several times before his legal mind could process what his other senses were picking up. He was surprised when word started spreading that Voyager wasn't destroyed in the Badlands almost 5 years ago just like everyone else. It didn't take long to hear that real time contact was finally established. The first report was shocking and disturbing. Like everyone else at Starfleet Command and Security, he had grave misgivings on Janeway's competency. Seeing a Borg waltz onto the bridge of a Federation star ship and take up a station was too much for him to accept. He lost his son at the Battle of Wolf 357. He wasn't sure what to think but he was prepared for the petitions that would fall on his desk for a ruling on her status upon arrival in Federation space. The legal implications would have to take a back seat to findings from Starfleet Medical and Security over her potential threat to the Federation and its allies. He had no problem with that. Their only precedent was Jean Luc Picard but this situation varied greatly. 

The added headache was the Klingon member of the crew. Obviously, she had to have been one of the Maquis. That was another headache but he tabled it because it really was cut and dried. Paris' report seemed clear and he knew what he saw with his own eyes. Who knew what kind of threat she could be to Voyager upon learning that the Federation was preparing for war with the Empire. Add to that her Maquis affiliation and the fact that the Empire has never had an amicable relationship with the Cardassian Union, everyone felt it was a powder keg waiting to explode in typical Klingon fashion.

This recording shocked him. O'Reilly sat back in his chair in utter amazement. He never thought he'd live to see the day when a Klingon acted like a Vulcan and a Borg was lecturing Starfleet on Federation values and individual liberty. O'Reilly was no expert but when he put aside his personal feelings on the Borg in general he had to admit, the distressed young woman in that recording was no Borg drone. At least not like one he'd ever read about. That was going to be an even greater headache. But, the immediate problem was the situation with B'Elanna. Starfleet regulations on awarding field commissions was clear. Voyager's strange circumstances not withstanding, Starfleet Command had the authority to revoke them at any time. Add to that the truth that she was not a Federation citizen and the laws regarding prisoners of war, the order was sound.

Then he got her file. O'Rielly was an attorney, not an engineer, but what he saw of her transcripts and test scores didn't require a scientific background. It was obvious that Academy instructors acknowledged her ability if nothing else. It wasn't like Voyager could request a replacement Chief Engineer. He wasn't prepared to comment on Paris' actions yet. The official or those that were most likely personally motivated. He didn't miss the way Paris dismissed his son or refused to look at him. That was not his concern. The report he was going to have to make to the Commander and Chief was.

After watching both recordings one more time he leaned forward in his chair and did the only thing he could. Pressing the intercom to his assistant,

"Get me Ellis Vaughan."

The engineering crew during Alpha shift immediately noticed B'Elanna out of uniform. No one commented because they just weren't sure what that was all about. It might be that she was off duty for the day and just stopping by like usual but that wasn't likely. The changes in her over the past year were sever. They were also a boom and a boost to her crew. They kind of missed the occasional flare up between her and Seven because each gave as good as they got. Violence not withstanding. They just liked to hear a good row every once in awhile. But, after word got around the first night she and Seven went to the holo deck, most people assumed she finally came to terms with her Klingon heritage for whatever reason and embraced it. Fine with them. Why she was out of uniform was confusing. Still, they weren't stupid and kept working. Vorik and Nicolette made eye contact discreetly and went back to work.. After three consecutive days of her being out of uniform and in her civilian Klingon clothes people outside of Engineering started to speculate and talk. No one was sure what was going on because she was still Chief Engineer and still a part of the senior staff. A few former Maquis from the lower decks really wanted to know if that meant they didn't have to wear their uniforms either.

The rumor mill was on fire because no one from the senior staff commented or made note of it. Initial stories that B'Elanna and the captain had some kind of falling out were quickly proved false when they saw the two women sitting together in the mess hall a few times laughing and talking during lunch. Still, it was just strange. They'd gotten no word from Starfleet yet on the war situation so B'Elanna never knew when D day would arrive. One evening she and the captain discussed it while having dinner in Janeway's quarters.

"The grapevine is on fire, captain. I'm gonna have to say something soon."

"Why?"

"To preempt whatever negative reaction comes when they find out what's going on back home. Some members of the crew will take greater offense than others."

Maquis wouldn't be happy about it. Bajorans would be incensed. 

"True, I was hoping we didn't have to say anything because it has the potential of polarizing the crew before we have any confirmation."

"Yeah, but if they think I'm out of uniform because of some protest to the Federation, there's no legitimate reason for others not to do the same. You put us in the same uniform to show that we are all one crew."

Janeway exhaled deeply before speaking.

"But the particulars of Starfleet Command's decision is no one's business but yours. They aren't entitled to that information and there's no way for them to get access to it. You aren't going to be a P.O.W. and if Starfleet has a problem with that they can just come on out here and impound my ship."

They both laughed.

"Be careful what you wish for captain. Seriously, I don't want any headaches for you. I don't think Engineering would have a problem taking orders from me when they find out. If so, I'll just tie the first one who says something in the shuttle bay and depressurize it then open the doors. It only takes one and the rest will follow."

"There's a reason you weren't training on the command track at the Academy you know."

"Yeah."

"Its your decision, B'Elanna. I don't want you feeling obligated to explain yourself."

She thought about it for a few minutes then came to a decision.

"They're already wondering and they've seen too many changes in me over the last year. I have a responsibility to let them know this isn't a product of my own change but just something that is. I won't mention anything about the war or the alliance. No sense borrowing trouble."

"That is very mature of you. But, you won't make the announcement alone. Chakotay and I will be there."

"You don't have to do that."

"Yes, I do. There will be no doubt in anyone's mind that your place and your position on this ship is secure no matter what Starfleet does."

"Thanks. Um, not that I'm complaining but how come we're having roast chicken instead of...the other stuff."

"Because someone, who did a lousy job of trying to remain anonymous, used Borg encryption codes to lock out all the ingredients for Yankee pot roast from my replicator."

B'Elanna almost choked trying not to laugh.

"You're kidding right?"

"No. And they went so far as to plant a subroutine in the ship's main computer denying me from accessing those ingredients from any replicator on board. Should someone else request those items there is a verbal command instructing them not to be an enabler to my addiction or allow themselves to be duped into supporting my habit."

"Ok, I'm not sure what to say because I don't want to get into trouble but you have to admit that was efficient."

Then she couldn't hold it in anymore and cracked up laughing.

"Shut up."

For all her tough talk to the captain, B'Elanna was nervous before stepping up to speak to the group assembled in Engineering. Only on rare occasions did she assemble the entire team from all 4 shifts but she felt that they should all get the information first hand. She knew it wouldn't take long to fly around the ship and this was the best way of insuring that a large enough group heard the truth even if they wouldn't retell the story. Chakotay caught her eye and moved closer to speak with her.

"You ok?"

"Just more nervous than I thought."

"You don't have to do this, you know."

"Yeah I do. Besides, its too late to back out now. Beta shift will kill me."

"Ok, but I'm right here."

"You always have been."

She smiled and he pulled her into a warm embrace. This really got everyone's attention and they didn't bother trying to pretend they weren't watching. B'Elanna was shocked to see Seven and Harry walk in followed by Tom, Tuvok, Nelix and the Doctor. Chakotay turned to the captain,

"Who's running the ship?"

"Beats me." Then she leaned in and gave B'Elanna a hug and whispered something in her ear before moving next to Chakotay.

They all stood behind B'Elanna and she felt more confident but also realized that the crew was probably getting worried. Then Naomi Wildman came in and walked up to B'Elanna.

"Hey squirt, shouldn't you be in school?"

"Tom said its alright to cut class some times. We all need a break."

B'Elanna rolled her eyes and laughed but couldn't complain. She cut more than her fair share of classes in the past.

"Ok, why are you here? Not that I'm complaining."

"I'm moral support. Plus, I brought you something."

Naomi handed her a beautiful water color painting. And B'Elanna was genuinely touched.

"Thank you, I'll hang it in my office."

"Great!"

Naomi held her hand and didn't move back with the others so B'Elanna figured close proximity was required as a part of her moral support and didn't say anything.

"Ok everyone, can I have your attention? I called this meeting so that I could make the announcement one time and all of you could get the factual information at the same time. Whether you decide to retell the story the same way is up to you but I'd appreciate not having it blown out of proportion."

Nervous laughter from most of the crowd.

"You've all noticed that I am out of uniform. The short of it is that Starfleet Command has revoked my field commission. That does not affect anyone on this ship except me. Uniforms required for everyone else. I am not a Starfleet officer so you do not salute me—not that any of you ever bothered to in the past—and you do not address me as Lt. Captain Janeway had no knowledge of Starfleet's decision and no authority to change it. This did not come from her. Do not make the mistake of spreading that lie or I will track down the source and show my displeasure for your attempt at dishonoring her or me. Think I'm kidding, try me. The captain made me Chief Engineer and a member of senior staff. Starfleet has not addressed that issue so the decision still stands. That's it people. Sorry to get you out of bed if you didn't think it was worth it. The rest of you, get back to work.

B'Elanna was right. It didn't take long for the news to spread around the ship. In less than ½ hour everyone heard it. She was somewhat shielded from the whispers and stares while isolated in engineering. No one looked at her out of sheer discipline. No one was stupid enough to ask her any questions either. This was just one more thing. But, the former Maquis members who'd grown very attached to their uniforms and truly began thinking of themselves as Starfleet officers were concerned that this would happen to them as well. Tension and anxiety was running high. Some Maquis were confused about how they should best support B'Elanna because they didn't have anyone to take their frustration out on. She made it clear it wasn't the captain's decision. Starfleet officers were stunned. The crew had too many problems and one too many attacks. The strain and the stress was obviously taking its toll on the crew. Two weeks later things were getting worse.

The most uncharacteristic sound came from Ops and it was a warning to all of them to take cover. A deep groan followed by,

"ghuy'cha'!"

Tuvok raised an eyebrow as he turned to Harry but would not censure his behavior. B'Elanna smiled, he really did that justice. Harry's command of Klingon was quite good. The captain was surprised 'cause she didn't know he had it in him. Uncertain as to the exact meaning of the word, she knew what it signified and she knew what was coming. The captain closed her eyes for strength before turning around,

"Harry?"

"Sorry captain. Incoming transmission. Same as last time. 1 minute to intercept."

B'Elanna was starting to wonder if she shouldn't work her bridge station because every time she did, Starfleet called. The captain looked at Chakotay and he just shook his head in resignation.

"Tom, please assist Seven in Astrometrics. I want to verify our long range navigation."

"Yes, Mam."

Tom knew why she did that and really didn't care. He was happy to be out of it and practically leapt from his seat turning over the helm to the secondary relief. He looked to Tuvok as he passed and nodded his head ever so slightly. They'd talk later. It really wasn't a good sign, empath or not, when one feels anxiety from a Vulcan. Seven damn near ran from the bridge but stopped to look at B'Elanna.

"I'm working my shift."

"Then I should stand with you."

"Uh uh. They don't need anymore chances for visual inspection. They've seen me. Perhaps they'll appreciate the new fashion trend they started."

B'Elanna was good at the talk but she did not want to be anywhere near Admiral Paris even through subspace. Preparing herself for a trip to the brig, she channeled the full warrior within. Seven looked hesitant because she felt she had a duty to stay. Tuvok was getting more anxious so Tom knew that meant Seven needed to get off the bridge.

"Captain's orders. Let's go."

The way he looked at both of them confirmed that he was trying to get her off the bridge more so than himself but she still wasn't sure. Time was ticking and Harry was already in a bad mood. He just looked at her sternly and in a most impressive tone which was a cross between Klingon and Borg shut down all opposition,

"Comply!"

That did it. She turned and left. Chakotay looked at the captain,

"What is happening to the crew?"

"Exactly. I have a few words for whomever is on the other end of that transmission."

"We're being hailed."

"On screen."

"Captain Jane...." He was looking around and talking but she cut him off and didn't let him get any further.

"Ops, transfer to my Ready room. NOW!"

The way she growled that out left no doubt in anyone's mind that Admiral Paris was gonna to get it. The last thing anyone saw was both of Eugene Paris' eyebrows shoot up in astonishment along with the shocked expression on his face. 

Once she was seated at her desk and the connection was established she just looked at him and the force 10 glare coming off her could have burned a hole in the hull plating. Oblivious or just stupid,

"Katie...."

"Captain Janeway, Admiral Paris."

"Excuse me?"

"My rank and my name for address. Its Captain Janeway."

Sensing immediately that this was going to be more difficult than usual, he tried to shift gears. He also couldn't explain to her that it was a conference communication and that many others were watching and listening in.

"Yes, Captain Janeway. I trust all is well."

She didn't say anything to that. She just looked at him like he was crazy. Yeah, this was insubordination to a direct superior but she really didn't care. She was also 60,000 light years away so she was really thinking he could kiss her ass but wouldn't say that until it was absolutely necessary. After a few moments of uncomfortable silence, which she could have cared less that she was the cause of,

"The purpose of this call, Admiral?"

"Is there a problem, captain?"

"There are several problems Admiral. There are 185 problems to be exact. Then there are a few additional ones after that. We'll address those in due course. The purpose of this call, Admiral?"

He didn't know what to say and his protegee was making him look bad in front of his colleagues so he moved on after clearing his throat.

"I noticed that one of your officers on the bridge was out of uniform."

He really shouldn't have moved on to that.

"You really want to do this now, Admiral?"

"Do what?"

"You know very well why B'Elanna is out of uniform. You revoked her field commission but have not bothered to transmit that order or inform me of your actions at the time you did so unilaterally when informing Tuvok. Since I was in the next room I don't think that was too much of a hardship. But then again, I am merely a captain so I am unfamiliar and inexperienced in the ways of the admiralty."

"No order was sent, yet she is out of uniform. It must not have been a hardship for her."

She shook her head in amazement and irritation then sat back in her chair.

"Yeah, you want to do this now. Fine. I told her that until official notice came, she could consider her field commission valid. However, B'Elanna is too honorable a woman to skate around with technicalities. She informed me that since she knew she was no longer entitled to wear the uniform, it would be dishonorable to cling to something that was not rightfully hers. That is why my Chief Engineer is out of uniform. The purpose of this call, Admiral?"

"Your tone is bordering on insubordination, captain."

"Are you going to revoke my commission, Admiral?"

"What is the problem? Or the 185 problems."

"My crew is falling apart as a result of your—actions. That is what. For almost 5 years we have worked as a cohesive unit. Sure, it was difficult in the beginning but we came together. I offered those field commissions for a reason. Everyone on this ship was to be an equal. I touted Starfleet principles. Gave them assurances that we could survive as long as we worked as one. Encouraged them to see past differences of Maquis or Starfleet. Put everyone in the same uniform and gave them rank and assignments based on their ability and nothing else. Everyone on this ship got a clean slate. No one was treated differently because of their past actions and certainly not because of their race. A fresh start and an opportunity to start over. That is what I promised them. One crew, one ship, one goal. We were united until your uninformed knee jerk reaction. ½ the crew is scared they are going to be stripped of their field rank and duties. The other ½ of the crew is so confused and they're all wandering around waiting for the other shoe to drop. And this is without learning the particulars of what is happening in the Alpha quadrant. That information, unofficial as it may be because as captain I have had no briefing on the matter, is being held among senior staff. We are completely alone out here and all we had for the last 4 years is each other. Now all of them are scared they don't have that anymore. Thank you, Admiral."

He just stared at her not knowing what to think or say. The next words out of his mouth were going to be difficult and he had no idea how she'd react.

"Captain, its war time."

"In the Alpha quadrant its war time. In the Delta quadrant we're just trying to stay alive. The purpose of this call, Admiral?"

This was not going well at all. 

"Captain, you know that in certain situations there must be sacrifice...."

"Sacrifice? You want to talk about sacrifice from your office at Starfleet Command in sunny San Francisco? I've got your sacrifice. Four years of water rations. Replicator rations. And the only reason we have replicator use is because B'Elanna worked some kind of engineering miracle of epic proportion to do that. Hell, I'm an engineer and I still can't figure out how she managed to make them work again. Four years of searching for planets with non toxic vegetation. Away teams who's only purpose is to go out searching for food for this crew. We have a mess hall. Intrepid class ships don't have mess halls, they have a captain's dining room. Well on Voyager the captain grabs a tray and stands in line with everyone else to eat whatever our cook—yes we have a cook—has managed to prepare. What is the purpose of this call, Admiral?"

He did not know what to say. He had no idea the situation was like that. Honestly he hadn't thought about it that much. Sure, he considered their difficulties with hostile species after watching Seven go off in the conference room. But all of this talk about replicator rations and having to search for food hadn't crossed his mind. None of them sitting in on the meeting thought about that and it was information they needed to have. Now some of them are shifting uncomfortably in their chairs. Vaughan catches Bates' eye and gives him the 'I told you so' look. 

"Captain, there are several purposes to this call. First, I am forwarding official notice regarding B'Elanna that her field commission has been revoked. Second, to inform you that the Klingon Empire has declared war on the Federation. There is notification of that in the transmission as well. Do you have any questions?"

She said not one word and simply stared at him with the 'get on with it' look.

"There is also a order rescinding Tuvok's order to arrest B'Elanna as a P.O.W. that won't be necessary at this time. She may continue serving as Chief Engineer. But, she is not a citizen of the Federation nor is she a citizen of a world with membership to the Federation pending. She is a citizen of a government we are at war with. There is a general announcement for you to read and distribute to the crew. You aren't saying anything, captain."

"Because I'm listening. And I'm trying to figure out how I can spin this disaster to my crew."

"Excuse me? What is the problem?"

"You have caused dissension and division within my crew unjustifiably. Maybe the Bajoran members of the crew would have taken the Federation's alliance with Cardassia a bit easier and with less fear if they didn't already have proof of the way Starfleet treated B'Elanna. Now, I will have to spend a great deal of time trying to assure them that their home world is still free and hasn't returned to Cardassian occupation. Bajor hasn't returned to Cardassian occupation has it, Admiral?"

"Of course not!"

"Well, my credibility is pretty much shot with the crew at this point so hopefully they've got some mail from home and an outside source can verify that for them."

"Perhaps if B'Elanna hadn't...."

"Don't. Please, do not do that. We have known each other a long time, do not do that. Do not show me a side of you that I have never seen in all these years. Do not confirm the fears and doubts of your character that I have pushed into the back of my mind for the last few weeks with words you will regret because they will be the last words you speak to me as anything more than my superior officer and not someone I looked up to like a father for years. Don't shame yourself in my eyes. Not today. Not after everything else you've done. Save it for when my crew is better. For when we are not running low on all essential supplies. For when we haven't just survived a boarding party that put 20 members of my crew in sick bay after fighting off invaders all over the ship. Save it for after we find a warp capable friendly planet so my crew can get some shore leave for the first time in—god I don't even remember. Save it for then, and not a moment sooner. "

"Katie, I didn't mean to upset you."

"I don't know what's going on with you or anyone else in the Alpha quadrant. But I'm concerned with what I have seen so far. Before you make any grand or sweeping decisions affecting me and my crew, think about it. Think about how they would affect you if you were 60,000 light years from home just trying to make it home while adhering to Starfleet principles. You'll get my reports soon. I'm transmitting them at the end of this communication. You will see. If I had violated the Prime Directive, we could have been home 4 years ago. Hell, read the logs there have been 7 opportunities for Voyager to return and each one of them would have been a direct violation of Starfleet and Federation law but I could have gotten my crew home. It would have been so easy. I was tempted; god knows I was tempted. No one would have known. But I followed the law. Do you know what its like to look your crew in the eye and say we cannot do that? Trust me, we can still find another way home if we stick together. They trusted me. Each and every time, they trusted me. They believed in me, Eugene. And every time it looks like the end for Voyager I have to wonder if it isn't my fault because I insisted on following the law. Every time someone dies I'm reminded that they wouldn't still be here in the Delta quadrant if I had just turned a blind eye and taken the easy way out. 

Can you imagine how hard it was, how much strength of character it took for this crew to swallow their desire to get home because they are adhering to Federation law that prevents the means for the one thing they crave? Do you understand how much conviction and dedication that takes for my crew? Do you have any idea how difficult it was for former Maquis members of this crew to sweep aside everything from the past, look their one definite chance of getting home in the face and then say no, it's a violation of Federation law? Its against the Prime Directive. There is no Starfleet and Maquis crew, it is just one crew. There are people on this ship who never attended the Academy for even a guided tour who can quote chapter and verse from Starfleet regulations and know exactly what they're talking about. I didn't require that, they have done that on their own.

I said Voyager is the Federation in the Delta quadrant. We are making First Contact for future ships that pass this way. But even if no one found out, I would know. My officers would know. So we didn't. We upheld Federation laws. We have followed all of Starfleet's regulations. There was no guarantee we'd ever hear from you all. But my department heads and senior staff complete their weekly reports, update logs and store them in the ship's computer waiting for the time that they are supposed to submit them, just as if we were in the Alpha quadrant. They have all done their parts. None of them told me they wouldn't follow regs or adhere to ships rules because they weren't Federation citizens. None of them complained and said they wouldn't do as they were assigned because they weren't Starfleet Academy graduates or traditionally commissioned officers. They said aye captain and they did everything I asked of them. 

You singled out a member of my crew as a cheap shot because you could and drew a line in the sand. You looked at B'Elanna and only saw Klingon then you put Tuvok in the worst possible position with your covert and clandestine meeting. He is Vulcan, he is not made of stone. And he has to live on this ship just like everyone else. Do you all at Starfleet understand that the reality is we might spend the rest of our lives on this ship? That we might never make it back to the Alpha quadrant? All we have is each other and there are no transfers or reassignments possible. Thank you for rescinding the order because it will make Tuvok's life easier. Why? Because you must have been crazy or out of your mind if you thought I was going to let that happen. Yeah, that's insubordination write it up and put it in my file. If we make it back to the Alpha quadrant I'll take the heat for it then. 

Do you understand that Voyager would not be here, the crew would be dead if it weren't for B'Elanna? I have to put her on restrictive duty because she works too many hours in engineering if I don't watch her. She loves her job and she loves working on this ship for this crew but you slapped her in the face. Starfleet said she has no worth and no value because of her race. By the way, Voyager found out what really happened to Amelia Earhart and several other humans missing from Earth during the early 20th century. It was B'Elanna who figured out how to destabilize the force field surrounding the stasis chambers the alien race who abducted them in 1937 housed them in. Technology that is more advanced than anything the Federation has access to. It was B'Elanna who figured out how to bypass the locking mechanisms on those stasis chambers so we could revive them. In case you care, Ms. Earhart is a fascinating woman and the opportunity to speak with her is something I'll treasure for the rest of my life.

There is no one else on this ship who can do what B'Elanna does. I am an engineer and if it were up to me I could not have gotten us out of some of the scrapes that she has. I could not have designed some of the upgrades she has made to this ship to help keep us alive and moving in the right direction toward home. Starfleet Corps of Engineers says that 79% is maximum efficiency for the Intrepid class warp core. Do you realize that Voyager's warp core operates at 103% efficiency? Voyager can cruise at warp 9.9 for 36 hours easily. That is because of B'Elanna. 

She is 25 years old with no diploma and continuously does what all the Starfleet experts say is not even theoretically possible. I won't even explain how she risked her life to contain the Omega we encountered two years ago. If she and Annika had not come up with some off the wall impossible system for repairing ripped space, Voyager and every other warp capable ship in that system would still be creeping along on impulse power. They actually stabilized Omega molecules for 3.7 hours in a controlled environment that they designed and built on their own. That is unheard of. According to Federation science that is not possible. They did it. And Starfleet actually expected me to throw B'Elanna in the brig because of her DNA? 

But she is more than just the Chief Engineer and if she were a crewman from the lower decks I would value her just as much and go to bat for her just as fiercely. I don't care what the political climate in the Alpha quadrant is in comparison to protecting my crew. 

I have a valued and trusted member of my crew who is now terrified of the Federation. I spent the last few years telling her how wonderful Federation values and principles are. The good work of Starfleet as the peace keeping arm of the Federation but that we are more than that. That we are about exploration for growth and understanding while accepting diversity and protecting individual liberty. She believed me. She believed everything I told her. And now she is terrified of the Federation and Starfleet. Terrified of what prejudice against her would lead to because she has seen an up close and personal example of the real Starfleet. This–is–what–you–have–done–to–my–crew."

"Is there anything else, Admiral?" 

Her voice was so distant and intense while she spoke it was painful to hear. He didn't mean to push her this far and he knew he crossed the line. But, he also couldn't go back and reinstate the field commission after that. He still didn't know what to think about Seven. Hearing that a Borg was afraid of the Starfleet and the Federation caused mixed emotions. Hearing some of the things B'Elanna did made him very uncomfortable because he realized that Starfleet Corps of Engineers would be all over them. Not one person watching this subspace conference communication moved and barely breathed while she spoke. 

"Captain, we were unaware of most of the things you've shared."

"That might have something to do with the fact that you did not bother to ask me."

"Yes. As I said, the information and orders will be transmitted to you at the termination of this call. The orders as they are, stand for the time being but are subject to change. I can appreciate the difficulties of your unique situation now but caution you to use due care when considering contravening a direct order."

She's just tired now and no longer wishes to speak to him or anyone else from Starfleet.

"Admiral, you or anyone else from Starfleet are more than welcome to come out here and personally relieve me of command, impound my ship and tow us to the nearest Federation ship yard. In the meantime, we have work to do."

He really should have shut up a long time ago but didn't get it. He just got it.

"Well, if there's nothing else, take care until next time."

"Goodbye."

After terminating the connection she used the piggy back system and transmitted all of her reports for the past four years. She also included her captain's log. The call was much longer than she realized and took its toll on her. Janeway had no idea if Admiral Paris cared about the things she said or if he would lighten up in the future. Her problem was how she would deal with the crew. The incoming directives and notifications from Pathfinder arrived but she didn't have the heart to look at them and got up from her chair. She walked over to the couch and sat down feeling like she'd just gone 10 rounds with a heavy weight. 

15 minutes later the door opened and Chakotay came in to check on her. He was concerned by the length of time she spoke with Paris and had Harry notify him when it ended. After she didn't return to the bridge he suspected she was not in the best condition so he wanted to make sure she was alright. She never looked up, didn't even acknowledge his presence. Chakotay sat down next to her silently. Without a word she simply leaned into him and he put his arms around her. Whatever happened during that call was definitely not a good thing, he was sure. So, he offered her support and waited for her to speak when she was ready or able.

Admiral Francis O'Reilly, Judge Advocate General, sat quietly in his office for several minutes after the conference link was broken. He, like everyone else, was not sure what was going on with Janeway. Everyone thought this would be the best means of determining just what kind of potential liability or problem she and her crew would cause the Federation. They agreed that Paris should be the one to make contact due to their personal relationship but also because he is her direct superior. O'Reilly was not prepared for anything he heard. He thought on how Voyager kept surprising a lot of people at Starfleet and was sure there'd be more to come. After confirming with his aide that the entire communication was recorded properly he retrieved the recording of Voyager's senior staff meeting and made the call that he knew he couldn't put off much longer. This was definitely something that Admiral Irena Khmelnova needed to see immediately. O'Reilly wasn't sure what she'd make of it but he had a pretty good idea. He tapped the intercom once,

"Get me the Commander and Chief."

Until she started laying out the last four years to Admiral Paris, Janeway was able to keep some of those things abstract in her mind on a daily basis. But, the reality is that she fears the backlash from her crew. Not mutiny. That isn't a concern. No, she fears that extra second hesitation when she gives them and order, that sweep of an eye when she tells them something and they are trying to decide if they believe her or not. Cautious reserve in place of open acceptance she grew accustomed to after the crew came together. And, she is afraid for Starfleet and the Federation. She has no idea what the truth of things really are back there but something was going on. Or did it take 4 ½ years in the Delta quadrant to see that Starfleet had always been that way? She really did not feel like testing reality versus any propaganda that she might have bought into at this time. She was just tired. 

It wasn't very captain like. She's pretty certain Starfleet would not recommend this as the ideal position for holding a briefing but she didn't really care at the moment. She was also becoming aware that at some point she crossed the line with her XO or he with her because these was no longer the supportive arms of a colleague. She was quite actively participating in a very non professional embrace. Maybe she could have played it off and talked herself out of thinking that if she hadn't just noticed her fingers running through his hair. Yeah, definitely not the way to communicate with one's XO. This is the very thing she tried to prevent for the last year or so. Besides, she was an engaged woman. At least that's what she kept telling herself because she's pretty sure that Mark mourned her passing then moved on. She also realizes that after 4 years in the Delta quadrant, she's changed so much he wouldn't recognize her let alone understand her. As good as this feels, she's sure she must stop it. She really has no clue why at the moment but is certain the reason will come to her later. Hopefully, before its too late. She moved to pull away but the arms tightened around her.

[Apparently, I am not getting out of it this time.]

Apparently, she didn't really care all that much because that was pretty much the end of her resistance. In fact, she made herself more comfortable and hoped the fallout wouldn't cause too much damage to the ship.

"Are you ready to talk about it?"

She exhaled on that one and shifted in Chakotay's arms so that she was resting with her back against his chest. Hey, she's the captain ALL the time. She figures if she's gonna screw things up she might as well do it the right away and get to just be the girl for awhile. Chakotay must be a mind reader because he obliged and did the guy thing of giving her all the room and then encircling her once again. It really did feel good to take just a little physical comfort and lean on someone else for once. 

"No, but you know we have to. The short of it is, all hell broke loose, orders were forwarded, and I think I told Starfleet to kiss my ass."

Even though there were some very serious things to discuss from that sentence, he couldn't help starting with the last one first.

"Excuse me? You think you told them to kiss your ass?" It was teasing and disbelief at the same time.

"There's not much I'm certain of during that conversation but I...kind of got a little worked up. I do recall mentioning something about him being crazy if he thought I was going to let B'Elanna be arrested. And, um at the end something I said might be construed as a kiss off or a challenge."

He's amused at this side of Katherine though he always knew she was capable of it. He'll worry about potential damage later.

"A challenge? What exactly could you say that could be construed like that?"

When she told him he sat up on the couch and turned her around so he could give her the full inspection. Either she'd lost her mind, which he was almost certain that she hadn't, or things were so screwed up at Starfleet and within the Alpha quadrant hell had more than broken loose. He was going to have to monitor or limit her communication with Starfleet if she wanted to continue being a model officer. It was just this sort of thing that could lead to Maquis behavior. Then he thought about what he just thought about and realized he needed a vacation because...well never mind.


	7. Calling down the Thunder

Admiral Bates did not want to have this conversation. He is the head of Starfleet Security. He had a responsibility to do what he did. He knows what's coming so he tries to head it off. 

"Go ahead. You can said it. I know you're dying for an I told you so."

Ellis Vaughan poured himself a scotch and turned to face Bates.

"No. That would be immature. I am too mature for that."

Bates snorted, Vaughan just celebrated his 103 birthday 2 months ago, he was more than mature.

"Thank you. I appreciate you keeping quiet."

"Oh no, my friend. I said an I told you so would be immature. I never said anything about keeping quiet."

"Let me have it."

"You—fucked—up. All you guys and your master plan. You—fucked—up. Away teams searching for food for the crew, water rations. But worst of all, the ONLY reason they're still stuck out there is because they're adhering to Starfleet regulations and the Prime Directive. You—fucked—up. Now I'm gonna say I told you so because this is a different matter. Didn't I say you guys went after the two who could've been of invaluable assistance to the Federation? I think I did. Omega? Hello! Cruising at warp 9.9 for a day and a half! Wait til Irena sees that recording. So, I told you so and you—fucked—up."

"There is no need to gloat."

"This is not gloating. This is me containing being pissed off. Hell, I can't believe Francis was stupid enough to go along with your clean up plan. Eugene should've just reinstated the field commission and been man enough to offer an apology for jumping the gun and being blindly prejudice. I told Francis this would be bad. I didn't tell him how bad because he is the JAG so I figured even he could interpret what he saw on that recording. But the three of you just had to be right sticking to your original position. Hiram and Nelson might as well have swastikas etched across their foreheads.

You shouldn't have been making your little plan to 'assess any potential threat Hanson might pose to the Federation.' Concealing B'Elanna's whereabouts from her family back on Qo'nos was a bad move. I cannot believe you guys not only thought of something that cruel but were asinine enough to think it was a good idea. You knew it will be another 4 months before Voyager will be in contact with us again. Good thing you kept that a secret from me. There's no way I would have backed you up on that. 

Here's a little news flash for you. A certain high ranking Starfleet Admiral made eleven trips to Qo'noS in the last 5 ½ years. Miral met with him in San Francisco nine different times. It seems that mom and dad have been searching for their daughter together since she left the Academy. Guess he wasn't deadbeat after all. Pray Enrique doesn't find out about your plan. But something tells me he will. You called down the thunder with that one. You'll get it and hell's comin' with it. Yeah, you guys fucked up. And by the way, I told you so about Janeway!

The captain went to Engineering to speak with B'Elanna and was shocked to find that she wasn't there. Vorik was not helpful and only stated that she left but that he was certain she would return. That wasn't like B'Elanna but she dismissed it initially until she tried to get more information.

"Has she gone to lunch?" It was earlier than B'Elanna ever went but still a possibility.

"I do not believe so."

Vorik being Vorik, she still was ready to give up and just come back later but noticed the nervous stares passing between the others. When she tried to catch someone's eye they all suddenly found something more important to look at. That was not the typical reaction so she knew they knew something and were keeping quiet. Considering all that happened in the last 24 hours and the ship wide announcement she was going to have to make later, Janeway thought B'Elanna became upset.

After checking the computer she learned B'Elanna was in her quarters. Had Tuvok or Seven bothered to update her on the situation she wouldn't have been so concerned. But they hadn't so she was. When no answer came to her repeated requests for entry she feared B'Elanna decided on ritual suicide because one of her exemptions or clauses in the code of honor no longer applied. Heart pounding over what she might find inside, she keyed in the over-ride and entered. Then she noticed she was the only thing in the room. How that escaped her this past year was beyond her. It was only then that she realized B'Elanna never put her furniture back—at least not in the living room and that concerned her even more. 

The captain heard a sound and went quickly to the bedroom. The sight of pillar candles lit and B'Elanna kneeling in front of what she assumed was an alter confused her. Shocked, she was not prepared for this and almost jumped in thinking her initial assumption was correct. It took a few moments to process what she was hearing and seeing. 

"Kahless I implore you to remember those warriors who have fallen in your name. Lift them up out of the Cavern of Dispar and reveal yourself to them in all your glory.

Remember Miral, daughter of L'Naan. Remember L'Naan, daughter of Krelix. Remember Krelix, daughter of K'Ehleyr. Remember K'Ehleyr daughter of Shenara."

By the time Captain Janeway gathered her wits it was too late and she realized she intruded on something very personal and very private. She tried to turn and leave unnoticed but B'Elanna stopped her without turning around.

"Captain."

"B'Elanna, I...I'm so sorry I didn't realize and I... you weren't in engineering and I rang the chime and I got scared that...Oh, God, I am so sorry."

Then the captain stopped stuttering and thought about it.

"How'd you know it was me?"

"Only one person can sneak up on a Klingon without being detected. Enhanced senses, captain, remember? I know your scent."

With that, B'Elanna extinguished the incense and the candles then stood and turned around. Janeway was just standing there with her mouth hanging open. She had several major shocks in a short amount of time so she wasn't sure which one was greater. The only thought in her head,

"I have a scent?"

B'Elanna laughed softly. 

"Yes, captain. Everyone does. It pleasant, don't worry. And stop looking so mortified."

"I...really I am so sorry."

"You thought I was going to kill myself?"

Blushing and trying to play off her guilt, embarrassment and fear she sort of shrugged.

"Its alright captain. I guess I didn't explain it well enough for you. Don't worry, I wouldn't do that to you. At least not like this. And certainly not during Alpha shift. I think Vorik's been eyeing my job!"

That eased the captain's tension just a bit and she relaxed.

"Come on, you can walk me back to engineering. If I'm late they'll probably freak out."

"You do this regularly?" Then she thought about it. "Never mind, I didn't mean to pry."

"Its ok. And yes, its mid day prayers."

Genuinely confused, Janeway stops and turns to B'Elanna.

"I thought Klingons killed their gods. Something about them being more trouble than they were worth."

B'Elanna laughed.

"Yes, that's true. The ancestors did that a long time ago. This is something different. It's the Plea for the Dead."

"Oh." She was curious but wasn't stupid enough to ask.

"So this is why Vorik was more cryptically Vulcan than usual when I asked where you were? Why no one wanted to look in my direction and pretty much ran from me like the plague?"

"Wow, I knew they realized my schedule but I didn't know they'd keep it like a state secret. I think only Vorik could figure it out and if he did, he'd never say anything. So, I'd guess that they have no clue where I am and were just trying to respect my privacy."

The captain blanched again but B'Elanna cut her off.

"Its ok. I trust you'll keep it to yourself. Besides, it isn't a major secret, just something private."

"I understand completely and I know nothing."

"Thank you."

"Now, want to tell me why you don't have any furniture? B'Elanna, you can't live like that."

"Yes, I can and I have for some time. Nothing's wrong. I like it like that. There isn't some Starfleet regulation I don't know about requiring the use of furniture is there?"

"Not that I know of and it really wouldn't matter if there were. You don't want furniture, you don't have to have furniture."

"Thanks, what's up?"

By this time they made it back to engineering and B'Elanna was well aware of one or two heads peeking around in her direction but said nothing. She led the captain to her office and sat down.

"The ship wide announcement. Chakotay feels, and I agree, that we should gather everyone in the cargo bay like we did when they voted on whether to stay with on the planet with the 37's or continue the journey. A skeleton crew can man the ship. Tom's going to pull us into low orbit near a moon and we'll be secure. It'll be broadcast ship wide but we agreed that the crew needs to see my face when I tell them the news. I am not reading that stupid message Starfleet forwarded explaining your situation in particular. Just the other stuff."

Then she stopped and leaned her head back against the wall with her eyes closed. 

"They aren't going to be the least bit happy and those messages from home are the only good thing about this transmission. You don't have to be there."

"Is the rest of senior staff going to be present?"

"Yes, but..."

"Well, if I'm still senior staff then I should be as well."

"I told you when this stupidity started that your place on this ship was secure. That has not changed. But you also don't have to be on display."

"Hah. I'm already on display, captain. Besides, they're smart. It won't take them any longer than to get over the initial shock before they realized why Starfleet revoked my commission. At least they'll be able to understand that. As bad as the news is, at least people won't be worried about losing their rank and uniform."

"Except the Bajorans. B'Elanna, this is going to be messy. Chakotay and I will be available for anyone or any group that wants to speak with us in private but there really isn't much comfort we can give them."

"You'd be surprised, captain. When the two of you act like you believe something, everyone else does. It's the command presence I guess."

"Quit buttering me up."

"Thank you all for coming on such short notice. There are several things I need to inform you all of. Do not worry, there is nothing wrong with the ship and our course and heading are still Alpha quadrant bound. We are secure. This is regarding home. I received another real time communication from Starfleet. At the end of the discussion, Starfleet Command forwarded information and directives to me. I also transmitted all our reports and my log for the last four years. I told you guys it was important to keep them updated."

That eased the tension a bit and everyone laughed.

"The information Starfleet forwarded is official notification of some things that are happening in the Alpha quadrant. A copy of their official statement will be updated to each of your personal com units at the end of this meeting so you can read it for yourselves. Also, be patient. Harry, Seven and B'Elanna will be decompressing the other attachments. Mail has arrived and once they sort it, they will upload those letters to your stations as well. It's a large file. Seven informs me that everyone has mail. Even our youngest member of the crew has a letter or two. I meant Naomi, not Harry."

More laughter.

"Now I need for you all to brace yourselves and hear everything I have to say. Once we finish here, Chakotay and I will be available for anyone who wants more clarification or information on the subject. Voyager is in the Delta quadrant and we have our own lives and mission. We are responsible for what happens on this ship and our conduct toward other species we encounter here. That is all we are responsible for.

There are many changes in the Alpha quadrant and I'm sharing with you all everything I know. There is no hidden information or captain's only briefing. A few months ago the Klingon Empire and the Cardassian Union had some dispute. It led to an invasion of Cardassian territory and armed occupation of many of their worlds. The Federation protested this action. As a result, the Federation has allied itself with Cardassia against the Klingon Empire....."

The room erupted at this point but she did not try to stop them. She did notice that people split their focus between B'Elanna and Chakotay for the obvious reasons. Once they settled down, 175 hardened eyes were staring at her waiting for the 200 lbs anvil they knew was swinging above their heads waiting to slam them into the lowest deck. She couldn't blame them.

"As a result of this alliance, the Klingon Empire declared war on the Federation some time last week. Starfleet Command gave me no information about the status of the war or any details or particulars. I don't know what will come through official channels so I'm going to rely on whatever information someone sends me in a letter from home. If any of you find out anything let me know. My understanding is that the letters we received this time were sent to the Pathfinder station prior to the declaration of war last week so we may not have any news on that for the next 3 months. That's when Voyager will be in position to be in contact with Pathfinder again. It isn't a perfect system but its more than we had for the last 4 years and its an amazing accomplishment.

Back to the matter at hand. I'm not going to lie to any of you, especially when its something that affects this crew. You're all smart. You can all now guess why Starfleet Command revoked B'Elanna's field commission. She is not a Federation citizen. While I think its stupid, it is out of my control. I can't make them restore her rank or allow her to wear the uniform. I can control what happens on my ship. As far as I'm concerned, NOTHING about B'Elanna's status on this ship or among this crew has changed. She is still Chief Engineer and she is still a member of senior staff. Do not forget that when dealing with or addressing her.

I specifically asked and was assured, Bajor's membership to the Federation is still pending and they are still working together. Bajor has NOT returned to Cardassian occupation and the Federation has no intention of seeing that happen. The present conflict is with the Klingon Empire, not Bajor in any way. Bajoran members of this crew are not technically Federation citizens but it does not matter since Bajor has applied for membership and is completing all the requirements. Bajoran members of this crew have special dispensation and Starfleet considers you Federation citizens for all intents and purposes. Starfleet is treating you as if membership has been approved. Everything else is business as usual.

Normally, a Starfleet captain should not comment on it. Since I'm the only Starfleet captain in the Delta quadrant, I get to do as I please. I do not approve of Starfleet's decision regarding B'Elanna. Short of yelling 60,000 light years across subspace, there was nothing else I could do. No one has told me, officially or unofficially, why the Federation allied itself against the Empire. We have been gone 4 years so we do not know what has taken place in our absence. I do not know what is happening within the Cardassian Union so I can't comment on that with any degree of certainty. I'm flying blind on this one just like the rest of you. As soon as I get some credible information one way or the other I will share it with the entire crew.

Please remember that we still have a job to do. We have managed to over come some pretty big obstacles and join together as a family. I do not want outside forces to tear us a part. We still have to live together on this ship and we still have to protect and defend each other. My job is to protect and defend this crew from all outside forces and that includes any in the Delta or Alpha quadrant. I will continue to do that. Your job is to continue to support each other while we complete our journey. We are still a Federation ship and we are still Starfleet officers. Each of you who were given field commissions are secure and Starfleet accepts them. You are Starfleet officers and I expect each of you to continue to act like it. I am proud of this crew and the work that you all have done. I am proud of the accomplishments that each of you have made and the growth and maturity you each have displayed. I was very clear on that to Starfleet Command. I was also clear on my intentions toward my crew. They got it. 

I know this was a lot to take in and I thank you for your patience. Take some time in quiet or amongst yourselves to let the information settle. Go to your quarters or stations and download the official notice so that you can read it...."

Then she stopped and turned to B'Elanna.

"Not to rush you guys but how long til you finish sorting the mail?"

"Anxious much, captain?"

A few nervous chuckles from the crowd. The captain laughed openly.

"Yeah, as a matter a fact, I am."

"Well, it should take us another 3 hours. We have to clean up some of the distortions in a few of the files."

"Ok. You guys heard that. Don't rush them so they can get it done right but in about 3 hours we'll all know something from our friends, loved ones, and colleagues. As I said before, Chakotay and I are available for ANYONE who wants to speak to us. We will give you all the information we have. Thanks for being patient and understanding. Thank you for remembering that we are all in this together."

With that the crowed disbursed, numb and shaken by her words. It was dead quiet on the ship for the rest of the night and no one was out and about.


End file.
